Hi. I came across this group when I was looking for answers to my 3 1/2 year olds behavior. My husband and I got custody of him at 2 (the day before we got married) and just gained permanent guardianship. Mom is very much in his life, although in jail right now. We have recently been seeing some very defiant behavior, "I don't like you", bad words just for shock value, tantrums if there is a change of routine or if we leave him with sitters. Poor little guy has been through so much, and I understand his issues with abandonment, but because of his mom's drug use (meth) I wonder if we're starting to see behavior problems? Or is this normal at this age? He's extremely smart and advanced, a very loving child when he's not having a "melt down". Any thoughts?