Hello,
My son might have Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. He will be tested, but the behavior therapist watching him at the school used to be part of an autism clinic and recognizes behaviors. I am nervous about posting mostly because I feel like others go through so much more than I do, but I guess I feel like I need some comfort that it's ok.
Another thing is that as I go through his diagnosis, I realize it's my diagnosis as well. I am constantly feeling like a failure as a mom because I feel like I can't stand up well enough for my kids at school. Emotional conflict leaves me very stressed, worn down, and shivering even though I might not have uttered a single angry word. So now, I feel like I'm a possible Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) parent raising a Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) child and there are moments where I wonder what made me think I could raise kids.
To my son's story:
He is extremely gifted. Last year he was in a one day pull out gifted program and he loved it. He was behaving really well in regular class. He would melt down now and then, but I didn't think anything of it because his younger brother was the one having behavior difficulties.
I had been noticing that he had sensory overload issues when very stressed, but I do too, so I just tried to keep him calm and get him away from those situations until he calmed down. When he is not stressed, he can handle sensory input for long periods of time.
This year, I moved him to an environmental charter school, because the regular public schools could not accomodate him academically and they promised that he would progress at least a grade level a year, which is huge for a gifted child.
This year he has progressively gotten worse in school and better at home. Before, his meltdown lasted a long time, now he generally gets himself under control in about 5-10 minutes and apologize to me and we will talk. In school on the other hand, he has been disengaging from almost all group work, has been reading continuously, has melted down spectacularly a number of times, and the teachers are having a hard time getting him to re-engage. The school has a behavioral therapist starting to create a plan for him, an Occupational Therapist (OT) working with him, and we have a diagnosis test in the works for him...but it really scares me to see my child going downhill at school.
I feel like he's in a spiral. He's learned that he can get out of group if he disengages, because the teachers are not going to handle a meltdown well, but because he gets what he wants, he disengages more and becomes more likely to have meltdowns when reintroduced to a situation he doesn't want. So...suddenly he is not handling situations that he would maybe have been uncomfortable in last year, but he would have been able to deal with. It really worries me, and despite the reassurance from the behavior therapist that when he puts together his plan and helps the teacher implement it, my older son will be worse off than he ever was.
I feel like maybe I made a horrible mistake in choosing this great school. They are supportive and really wonderful, but he misses his gifted center and I think that maybe I took him from the one thing that made school palatable for him.
I know this might not really be as bad as many of you have to deal with stress wise. I feel very sheepish asking for support, but I feel very lost and worried.
Thank you.
Lya
My son might have Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. He will be tested, but the behavior therapist watching him at the school used to be part of an autism clinic and recognizes behaviors. I am nervous about posting mostly because I feel like others go through so much more than I do, but I guess I feel like I need some comfort that it's ok.
Another thing is that as I go through his diagnosis, I realize it's my diagnosis as well. I am constantly feeling like a failure as a mom because I feel like I can't stand up well enough for my kids at school. Emotional conflict leaves me very stressed, worn down, and shivering even though I might not have uttered a single angry word. So now, I feel like I'm a possible Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) parent raising a Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) child and there are moments where I wonder what made me think I could raise kids.
To my son's story:
He is extremely gifted. Last year he was in a one day pull out gifted program and he loved it. He was behaving really well in regular class. He would melt down now and then, but I didn't think anything of it because his younger brother was the one having behavior difficulties.
I had been noticing that he had sensory overload issues when very stressed, but I do too, so I just tried to keep him calm and get him away from those situations until he calmed down. When he is not stressed, he can handle sensory input for long periods of time.
This year, I moved him to an environmental charter school, because the regular public schools could not accomodate him academically and they promised that he would progress at least a grade level a year, which is huge for a gifted child.
This year he has progressively gotten worse in school and better at home. Before, his meltdown lasted a long time, now he generally gets himself under control in about 5-10 minutes and apologize to me and we will talk. In school on the other hand, he has been disengaging from almost all group work, has been reading continuously, has melted down spectacularly a number of times, and the teachers are having a hard time getting him to re-engage. The school has a behavioral therapist starting to create a plan for him, an Occupational Therapist (OT) working with him, and we have a diagnosis test in the works for him...but it really scares me to see my child going downhill at school.
I feel like he's in a spiral. He's learned that he can get out of group if he disengages, because the teachers are not going to handle a meltdown well, but because he gets what he wants, he disengages more and becomes more likely to have meltdowns when reintroduced to a situation he doesn't want. So...suddenly he is not handling situations that he would maybe have been uncomfortable in last year, but he would have been able to deal with. It really worries me, and despite the reassurance from the behavior therapist that when he puts together his plan and helps the teacher implement it, my older son will be worse off than he ever was.
I feel like maybe I made a horrible mistake in choosing this great school. They are supportive and really wonderful, but he misses his gifted center and I think that maybe I took him from the one thing that made school palatable for him.
I know this might not really be as bad as many of you have to deal with stress wise. I feel very sheepish asking for support, but I feel very lost and worried.
Thank you.
Lya