no TV ??

jannie

trying to survive....
I was just reading the post about the tv special on Sunday p.m. Some of you replied saying that you had no TV...just wondering...

Did you get rid of TV because of difficult child? I know many of our kids are influenced by bad TV, however I don't think I'd want to live without it....

How many of you are without TV? Does this mean no video DVD players or video games??

We just have regular TV...and I feel like we are the last ones on the street without a flat screen and/or plasma.
 

tiredmommy

Well-Known Member
Jannie,
We have satellite, a vcr & dvd player. This can sometimes make it difficult to pull Duckie away to do more meaningful activities. I'd have to say, though, that she'd probably be considered a easy child in this area. We pick and choose movies, plus she's allowed up to an hour a day but only if her other stuff (school work, music, chores, etc) are caught up. I found that her tv viewing has easily went down since I banned eating in front of the tv.
 

Janna

New Member
Jannie,

We have televisions here, but we have NO cable. We don't even get local channels.

The boys are limited on their television time. ALL movies they watch have to be approved and watched by SO and I first (or rated G).

They do have a Playstation II, a VCR and DVD player. The way it works here is they are allowed either 30 minutes PS II time each per evening or they may watch one movie. However, before they can, all homework, dinner, chores, showers MUST be done first. There is no bending this rule, no exceptions.

On weekends, the TV is not allowed on until after dinner. This forces them to find other things to do.

We do bend this weekend rule if it's raining outside. That is the only exception for that.

Yes, we're horribly mean to our children.

You know what? My kids have all calmed down alot since the removal of all the television. Yeah, hard for them at first, but now, they don't even seem to care.

Janna
 

timer lady

Queen of Hearts
Are you kidding???? Television is respite in this household. I use parental controls on what can be watched. However, when all else fails with either of my difficult children, I can count on Nick or Disney channel for at the very least one half hour of calm.

I just do what works here.
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Well, we have tv.

But when my kids were growing up tv was strictly regulated. Not so much because of gfgdom per say, as I think kids as a whole now days spend way too much time watching tv or playing video games.

My kids never watched more than a couple of hours of preapproved programs a day. They never saw any prime time shows til they were in mid teens. Video games were strictly a weekend activity and lasted only an hour per kid. All this was subject to whether homework and chores were done.

My kids wound up watching very little tv and not playing video games much. They spent the vast majority of their time playing outside and with their toys or on craft projects. easy child still rarely watches tv, same with N. Somehow T became my tv/video addict. lol
 

mum2JK&TH

New Member
:blush: I am somewhat embarrassed but I can explain! :blush: We have a tv, dvd player, xbox360, wii and computers. During my daycare hours none of this is played and husband is the culprit for most of these. However, we don't watch much of the tv, mostly hockey games which is a family affair as we all sit together and watch. I do not agree with all the games that husband allows difficult child to play but I pick my battles. We have agreed any games that trigger tics are off limits, therefor I did get my wish as this takes away all 1st player games which usually are the ones I don't agree with. All game systems and computers are in the living room so we are always together or we are playing with them (well more husband, I'll do the Wii though). Mine spend most of their time playing games on the computer (Webkins being the game of the month for now). We don't really have a time limit for any of these because both have sports that take up a lot of time (easy child especially) and we balance it with other things. I am sure difficult child would probably be calmer without the video games but to be honest...there are times when it's nice that he is busy with it as it gives me a few minutes peace. As long as they are still active, work is getting done and they are polite and respectful, I don't worry too much...
 

Liahona

Active Member
I'm one of the ones without tv. Its not because of difficult children. We just don't like the regular tv and can't afford cable. We do have a dvd player and love to watch the same movies over and over. We also have gameboys. Gameboy time is limited because difficult child 1 gets upset if he loses. I try to limit movie time, but it depends on how much of a respite I need. I've found that difficult child will work hard to get movie time ONLY IF the movie is already going and he can hear he is missing it. Sometimes I turn on a movie just for that reason.
 

Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
I'm with Timer Lady on this one. Sometimes tv is used as respite. My husband is a huge tv/movie buff. As we speak we are watching his DVD of That Girl. I think husband watches more tv than any of us. difficult child will only watch for awhile unless it's a movie he is really interested in. We also have game cube but he goes with spurts on that and will only play usually if one of will play with him.
 

DazedandConfused

Well-Known Member
We have three TVs (one big screen) and when our masterbedroom addition is done, we are getting a big flat panel TV with DVD entertainment system for husband because he loves to watch NASCAR and drag racing. Also, we have two DVD players, gamecube, and gameboy.

TV watching is not a big issue, or a problem in our house. Son would much rather play outside with other kids than watch TV. Sometimes, I will even TELL him to watch a little TV, or play video games, when he claims there's no one to play with and he won't stop whining.

I like to watch TV and I like my shows. However, I do like to do other things while I watch. Like posting here (on the laptop)while I watch a show. I also like to crochet while I watch TV, or a movie. Then I don't feel like I'm "wasting" my time.

With Daughter, it's computer time that is argued about most of the time. She could spend all day on the computer chatting and posting on Myspace. So, I have to make sure the computer is logged off or she's right on it as soon as she gets up.

There was a family in the neighborhood that for religious reasons did not have a TV. When their kids would come over to play with Daughter they would come in and be GLUED to either Nick or Disney. Poor daughter would be begging them to go play outside and she would have to turn off the TV to get them to go out with her to play.
 

Marguerite

Active Member
Christine, we're with you. We don't have cable, although we have just about everything else electronic. As I type this I'm babysitting difficult child 3's menagerie of Tamagotchis. We have computers everywhere, of varying ages. Three laptops, one electronic word processor (for difficult child 3's schoolwork), one main BIG computer for the majority of our work/play and various other still-working computers for different (mostly recreational/educational) purposes around the house. We're not wealthy. difficult child 3's first computer was an old Mac Classic we found on the local nature strip, waiting for the rubbish collection. husband rescued it, found it wasn't booting up and booted it from an external hard drive. This helped us diagnose a simple fault which was cured by reformatting and reinstalling a new operating system, as well as lots of lovely educational games for our baby. As it had cost us nothing, we didn't mind if difficult child 3 destroyed it. But he didn't, and we discovered some wonderful things in our tiny tot as a result. Since then we've allowed the younger ones to always have access to our old computers. We limit what games are installed (we insist on only educational stuff, but fun stuff, on them) and we've found that the kids have often learnt more from their computer games than they did at school.

We got a DVD player very early, and we have a massive collection of classic and educational DVDs. We listen to a wide range of music in various situations, and so the kids have very eclectic tastes in music, movies and general knowledge.

We have rules on what can be watched when and by whom, the rules varying according to individual requirements. The main TV is near the kitchen and whoever is cooking gets to choose the program. All computer games must go off at 8.30 pm. Any chores needing to be done after 6 pm - games go off if chores aren't being done. No gaming or recreational activity during school hours, even if a child is home sick. Educational computer games are the exception, once all book work is completed. Or, if the child feels too ill, they can sleep. But even a feverish child has to study during school hours if they're awake enough. If they're too ill to hold a book but too awake to sleep I'll let them watch a documentary.

For us, gadgets and technology are a huge assist and help us provide an enriched environment. In most other areas we're minimal technology. No air conditioning. Only two heaters. No clothes dryer. No pre-packaged or instant meals.

But we do have TVs. difficult child 1 found his on a similar scrap heap to difficult child 3's computer. difficult child 3 has other computers which he uses to learn programming. We adapt, re-use, modify and learn. Our walls are covered with educational posters, Escher prints and puzzles. The house is a mess but we can generally find what we need as well as what we don't. There is a recently-shed python skin on the buffet in the dining-room. It's right underneath the geology and palaeontology collection. difficult child 3 has a collection of small cube puzzles. Immediately outside is a wilderness full of ever-changing life-forms. If we want more excitement we go for a short walk to the beach or deep into the bush. Our neighbours are world-class artists (some) and others are very ordinary talents (like us). A chat over the fence is sometimes very boring, or sometimes exciting. We never know ahead of time.

I guess it's not what we've got but what you do with what you've got that counts.

Marg
 

Pam R

New Member
We've had no TV for 24 years now. But, we do have a "neutered" TV that serves as a monitor. It does not, and never has or will, get channels.

We have hundreds of educational videos and recently entered the 21st century and got a DVD player. :rofl:

So we have both video and DVD players. We also have a computer each. But no game cubes, PS2's, etc. Never have had, never will. There are very few games on the computers, just solitaire.

The reason we don't have a TV is we felt most of what was on did not promote good values. Also far too much sex and violence, even in "children's" programs.

It was also an effort to stem the tide of the advertising, another pervasive evil, in our mind.

I quickly found that DS would copy the violence he saw on a screen and so we were careful about what he watched. Just telling him that behaving like that was not acceptible and why had no effect. I now realize it was the severe EDD that kept him from understanding this, as it did in most other areas of his life.

We very recently acquired a collection of recreational videos when my sister converted all of her's to DVD to save room. But these were also screened.

If we heard about a good program on TV, we'd ask someone to tape it for us. But mostly we found our own things through libraries, tag sales, etc.

For us, we found TV addictive and we had lots better things we wanted to be doing with our lives. Like reading, being outside, using our imagination (something I noticed long ago many kids seem unable to access on their own) and being creative.

I've also learned that there are studies that show that kids who watched TV or spent a lot of time in front of a screen showed less development in parts of their brains. It seems some necessary pathways are not developed in some areas.

I've never regretted not having a TV. I never missed what I consider could have been a much less than positive influence in our lives.

Pam R.
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
We have no cable. The kids are allowed to watch "The Nanny" (I'm not kidding!) and very few other shows, and basically not allowed any TV on weeknights. I got rid of cable yrs ago because husband was addicted and the noise bothered me.
Now we rent movies, or buy the classics. The kids have watched Singing in the Rain and My Fair Lady so often, they have them both memorized. We have most of the old I Love Lucy collection.
Some of the reason is difficult child... no Game Boy, because speed and lights make him crazy, as do some of the TV commercials. (They give me a headache, and some of the computer ads do too, but at least I know enough to x-out.)
If we got cable/satellite, we'd subscribe to Animal Planet and Disney and History. "IF."
difficult child just earned back his computer yesterday. He is allowed to play Backyard Football and Backyard Baseball, and Solitaire (the old card game). Other games make him crazy. He is highly sensitive to lights, etc. and explodes. I can always tell when he's snuck over to a friend's house and played GameBoy because he storms in the door, starts badmouthing me, and breaking things. It's nice to know one of his main triggers!
 

Fran

Former desparate mom
We have several TV's.
Tv watching was not an issue in our home and I'm not making it one. It was respite when difficult child was younger and it was family share time frequently.
My husband loves movies and I like a lot of the shows on tv. I follow them in the evening. I find many good things to watch and intend to keep watching them.
We have some limits. It's personal though. When I gave up working outside of my home, I was afraid to get sucked into stereotypical behavior of being a tv watching mom. No TV until 5PM.
The kids were pretty good at self limiting TV. Like I said it just wasn't an issue. If I saw they were watching a little more than we were comfortable with, it was easy enough to pull them away.

I did not allow tv in their bedrooms so I had some idea of what was being watched. It wasn't even a request on their part so it wasn't an issue. It was just common sense on my part and their part.

I figure if all of us who say our kids don't watch a lot of tv is true that the statistics are not accurate. LOL. There were times when difficult child watched more tv than I would like to admit but it was the lesser of the two evils and I don't really care what the experts say. I'll use my own common sense and judgement about tv and allow it in the house.


2 hrs of PBS is preferable to 1hr of some of the action hero movies with the violence and poor behavior. Common sense.
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
We have always had at least one tv. Now that the kids are older we have more than one. Now I think everyone has one. Well that would be more of a DUH! comment wouldnt it...lol since they are all grown up now.

When they were younger they didnt have a tv in their rooms and it simply wasnt a problem for any of the kids except my oldest. He was our couch potato. The younger two you couldnt tie down to watch a complete tv show unless they were sick or it was raining so badly they simply couldnt go outside. We had the video games but the same was true for them too. They would play with them for a bit but grew tired of them and wanted to be outside too much. They were active boys!

Maybe it helped that we lived in the country and there was room to run, ponds and rivers to fish, trees to climb, forts to build. By the time my kids got out of school all they wanted to do was be outdoors. They would watch some tv at night but they normally fell asleep once they got still.

I am a huge tv watcher. I have the tv on 24/7 and cannot sleep without it on. Now Jamie is a video game junkie. He has a gamecube and uses it to relax. He is also a movie buff but I figure since he is an adult...as are all the boys, it is their right to watch what the want.

We have noticed that the baby is becoming a tv freak. She loves watching the action on the tube. She especially loves sports like football and NASCAR. I did go out and get her some age appropriate videos...lol. She likes those too. Somehow I am not thrilled with hearing "do you know the muffin man" 100s of times a day...lmao.
 

totoro

Mom? What's a difficult child?
We have 2 tv's but no cable, no channels at all... we do have internet... husband works from home when he is here. I would go crazy with-o the internet.
We do have dvd,vcr and kids have leapster's from in-laws that I really like.
They watch very limited movies and we try to stick to educational animal shows and the like. difficult child does do her exercise videos alot yoga, kickboxing...

Her school is very anti media, and we have found tv was winding her up more and more, (this is our second stint with no tv) we have also found her anxiety was so bad that she was getting scared over most shows on tv... she really can not tolorate any violence, drama, scary material etc. (even hinting at a scary theme).

So our life is much easier with-o tv... we netflix and do the intenet..
 

Andrea Danielle

New Member
Hi there, I have put a lot of thought into this topic myself. I had posted about this a few months ago. My 5 year old difficult child is a sponge for everything he sees on TV, he repeats lines of things he sees constantly. He doesn't forget a thing, it is scary. Nothing gets past him, he especially remembers anything negative. The other issue we have with TV's is that there are explosions over turning off the TV or fighting over what to watch. So, we have tried a few different things, we "broke" our TV's, and e said we couldn't afford to fix them. So for 2 months they watched no TV at all. It was great but there was no respite, which we all really need. So, we brought back the TV's but now say that we have the kind of TV's that only work on weekends. So, FRiday night to Sunday difficult child can watch TV but during the week, we just unplug them - he hasn't figured it out yet. This seems to be the best way for us. During the week we avoid all of the battles which TV's bring. And on the weekends, we can do housework or just relax while he watched some G rated TV shows or movies. We also have him in activities on the weekend, like swimming and circus class so that he isn't able to just lie on the couch and watch TV all weekend.

We all do what works for us!

Andrea
 

hearts and roses

Mind Reader
I believe in moderation - everything in moderation. Niether H nor I have ever been tv junkies and we never promoted it for the girls. We prohibited some shows for various reasons and I blocked many channels, such as MTV, VH1, E!, etc. (too much filler crap and inappropriate ads).

Whether or not a home has a tv is obviously a personal choice, and one we considered - we've only had one tv in the family room since recently. I do not feel that tv is all evil. I think there are many programs on many stations that are educational, thought provoking and controversial in such a way that it promotes discussion and understanding. There were a couple of shows that my daughter's had argued for the right to watch and after I watched it with them several weeks in a row, I agreed to allow it. Turned out the show wasn't what I thought it was.

All throughout thier childhoods, into thier teens, into the present, we've also our bi-weekly visits to the library; we've promoted reading for personal entertainment and education; we've promoted personal interests in music & arts; we've tried to balance out various exposures to 'real life'.

I can probably count on one hand how many times I've used tv as means of respite...it never held that allure for difficult child. easy child now uses her tv as background noise and it's always on the Food Network!
 

jamrobmic

New Member
I think tv has done my difficult child more good than harm. He doesn't like to read, but does like to watch a lot of history, science, & nature shows. When he was younger, he didn't spend a lot of time watching tv, simply because he was busy doing other things. So we never felt it was necessary to limit his tv watching. We did censor content by putting a password on shows with s-e-x, bad language, etc., but that didn't always work-a couple of times he outsmarted us and rented some porn. That's why we still have a password for any pay-per-view shows, even though he's 18.
 

LittleDudesMom

Well-Known Member
I enjoy tv and so do my kids. difficult child loves the History Channel, it's his fav along with Animal Planet and Cartoon Network. For my difficult child, it's a great unwinder. easy child watches mostly with me and we don't watch that much. Evenings are pretty busy and we all usually mosey upstairs between 8 andn 8:30 which doesn't allow for evening programs. I only follow one show and that's All My Children which I tape and watch when I have time. I don't really watch much tv during the day other than the morning news. I'm a satelite radio fan and I have a receiver that I can move from the car to the house which I listen to as I'm working around the house.

difficult child is a big gamer and we have more than one game system.

Common sense is the rule in regards to tv, gaming and computer in my house. Not too much, mom has final say on content and amount and a definate cut off time. easy child's laptop has to be off at 10 and her phone has to be turned off and charging at the same time. She has a Sidekick 3 so that has internet access and iming.

So, yes we have tv and it is enjoyed by all but not to the point of distraction. It is relaxing and something we enjoy as a family.

Sharon
 
Top