Off to get Q again...sigh
- Thread starter buddy
- Start date
I hope you day gets better ...
buddy
New Member
Luckily the principal and psychiatric stayed well out of my way. mr sp ed said he was calm, they had just given him medications when i got there. He said that Q spit on the teacher aide and then when teacher tried to redirect him he kicked her. While I went in to get him mr sp ed came too. Every time I have done it myslef I have had him out of there in 15-30 minuts..... he kept trying to talk nicely to Q and every time Q talked he had an answer, I tried to lead by example but that never works, they think you are just letting them get away with something.
Q started perseverating about his samsung galaxy and I had it in the car to tempt him out. I told him but then it came to none of this would have happened if you would have let me bring it to school every day....(obviously not connected but it was an issue NOW). finally an old aide he loves from his elementary school went by and I said you go in, he LOVES you...and mr sp ed said what would happen. She opened his door and asked and he said yeah she could come in.... she talked to him (she is super calm, works with very very disabled kids) and next thing I know they went to get a drink together. Q had said, mom just let me bring it to school and they can tell me I can't have it... I asked mr sp ed and he said, fine we can take care of it here. He said normally we take it away but for him I will say he can't ever bring it again. he said I can see he is just stuck. I said if you say that I bet he will jsut get his coat on and walk out.
Guess what, I was right again. By this time the table was turned over, two chairs, papers ripped up, the computer was on teh floor(he didn't smash it kind of pushed it, caught it and set it on teh ground, lol..... stepped on the key board but it is fine.
Thank heaven mr sp ed was the only one involved. psychiatric walked by but just hung out and stayed quiet. I think he has been warned.
Here is the thing.... I have to see what set this off. Q says he didn't mean o spit. I doubt that, but I do not doubt that he did not think it would hit her. He said they were gooing around when it happened and he wasn't trying to be mean but he was trying to be mean when he pushed/kicked the teacher becasue she was so mad about it. SInce he was honest about that I do believe that the spit was not fully meant to hurt her, but while i was there he spit all over me many times . I finaly told mr sp ed we had to leave and just let him be.... he had just gotten his afternoon medication so was calming. sure enough... at 1/2 hr after medication, he was able to handle the bringing it to school thing just fine and he put his stuff on and walked out with me.
Are we at 10 days yet??? problem is, I know they will just push for a transfer when we hit 10.
Q started perseverating about his samsung galaxy and I had it in the car to tempt him out. I told him but then it came to none of this would have happened if you would have let me bring it to school every day....(obviously not connected but it was an issue NOW). finally an old aide he loves from his elementary school went by and I said you go in, he LOVES you...and mr sp ed said what would happen. She opened his door and asked and he said yeah she could come in.... she talked to him (she is super calm, works with very very disabled kids) and next thing I know they went to get a drink together. Q had said, mom just let me bring it to school and they can tell me I can't have it... I asked mr sp ed and he said, fine we can take care of it here. He said normally we take it away but for him I will say he can't ever bring it again. he said I can see he is just stuck. I said if you say that I bet he will jsut get his coat on and walk out.
Guess what, I was right again. By this time the table was turned over, two chairs, papers ripped up, the computer was on teh floor(he didn't smash it kind of pushed it, caught it and set it on teh ground, lol..... stepped on the key board but it is fine.
Thank heaven mr sp ed was the only one involved. psychiatric walked by but just hung out and stayed quiet. I think he has been warned.
Here is the thing.... I have to see what set this off. Q says he didn't mean o spit. I doubt that, but I do not doubt that he did not think it would hit her. He said they were gooing around when it happened and he wasn't trying to be mean but he was trying to be mean when he pushed/kicked the teacher becasue she was so mad about it. SInce he was honest about that I do believe that the spit was not fully meant to hurt her, but while i was there he spit all over me many times . I finaly told mr sp ed we had to leave and just let him be.... he had just gotten his afternoon medication so was calming. sure enough... at 1/2 hr after medication, he was able to handle the bringing it to school thing just fine and he put his stuff on and walked out with me.
Are we at 10 days yet??? problem is, I know they will just push for a transfer when we hit 10.
T
TeDo
Guest
So, do you have any idea what STARTED the whole thing? Has Q been able to "backtrack" with your help to figure it out? Did they follow the Behavior Plan? Are they considering all these as OSS? My social worker told me they had to be marked as Excused Absences if I chose to pick difficult child 1 up. They would call me to calm him down but if I saw that it was going to be pointless, I told them "I am taking him home for a mental health break" per the social worker's instructions.
I can see where his new "obsession" with the galaxy player and wanting to bring it to school could very well have been in the back of his mind all day and just got thrown in the mix when something else came along to add stress. He had a "plan" that didn't work and he was mildly stressing over it and decreased his stress level. difficult child 1 has done that MANY times before.
{{{{(((HUGS)))}}}} to you both and I hope you can get to the bottom of this. SOOOOOO glad the "idiots" stayed out of the picture but I would still be irritated that the psychiatric stayed and observed. Something is bound to get twisted in there somewhere.
I can see where his new "obsession" with the galaxy player and wanting to bring it to school could very well have been in the back of his mind all day and just got thrown in the mix when something else came along to add stress. He had a "plan" that didn't work and he was mildly stressing over it and decreased his stress level. difficult child 1 has done that MANY times before.
{{{{(((HUGS)))}}}} to you both and I hope you can get to the bottom of this. SOOOOOO glad the "idiots" stayed out of the picture but I would still be irritated that the psychiatric stayed and observed. Something is bound to get twisted in there somewhere.
StressedM0mma
Active Member
Ugh. Sorry. Is there a full moon somewhere around here or what? It seems as if alot of our difficult child's are having a rough time.
I have no clue how you stay so calm. I would be spitting nails, but at the school staff not my child. My first thought when I saw the thread was "how did they trigger him NOW?"
WHY is it that they have to be the "boss" of the kids every second, that the kids have to be punished THEIR WAY even if it is well known that their way makes things worse? Seriously, didn't we stop using leeches as medical treatment because we figured otu they didn't work? in my opinion there is a LOT in a traditional school that is about as effective as using leeches as medical treatment.
Keep counting up these days out of school. They DO count even if school doesn't want them to.
WHY is it that they have to be the "boss" of the kids every second, that the kids have to be punished THEIR WAY even if it is well known that their way makes things worse? Seriously, didn't we stop using leeches as medical treatment because we figured otu they didn't work? in my opinion there is a LOT in a traditional school that is about as effective as using leeches as medical treatment.
Keep counting up these days out of school. They DO count even if school doesn't want them to.
Buddy, sorry I might have missed something......were your children on holiday.....did your school just started?
Dont know how your system works.....they dont switch teachers and stuff in January like we do?
Anyway...where I am going with this: I am assuming his galaxy player makes him relax.....calm down, switching of from background stuff? I know my so is like that with his PS 3 and then he will play his repetitive skate game all the time.....If he so desperately want to take the game to school....it might be that he is giving a hidden message that he was feeling very stressed at school that day? Maybe you can start the conversation in that direction......asking him why he would have liked to take his player with.....what it meens to him? Does it make him relaxed? Was he feeling a bit more stressed than usual.....and then the golden question....what does he think caused him to feel more stress than usual.....did something in the program changed, was teacher in a misrable mood, what type of activities did they do, new kids moved in class, .....I think you see where I am going with this?
Good luck for today....
And yes I so IDENTIFY with you regarding people thinking you are being soft soap by not reacting to kiddos unexceptable behavior! Hugs!
Dont know how your system works.....they dont switch teachers and stuff in January like we do?
Anyway...where I am going with this: I am assuming his galaxy player makes him relax.....calm down, switching of from background stuff? I know my so is like that with his PS 3 and then he will play his repetitive skate game all the time.....If he so desperately want to take the game to school....it might be that he is giving a hidden message that he was feeling very stressed at school that day? Maybe you can start the conversation in that direction......asking him why he would have liked to take his player with.....what it meens to him? Does it make him relaxed? Was he feeling a bit more stressed than usual.....and then the golden question....what does he think caused him to feel more stress than usual.....did something in the program changed, was teacher in a misrable mood, what type of activities did they do, new kids moved in class, .....I think you see where I am going with this?
Good luck for today....
And yes I so IDENTIFY with you regarding people thinking you are being soft soap by not reacting to kiddos unexceptable behavior! Hugs!
buddy
New Member
I still dont know what set him off. i think having his galaxy player only came up once he saw me. He sometimes doesn't know what set him off...it can just be a jolt of electrical activity and he will eventually say, when asked why, some dumb thing that doesn't make sense. They just dont get it that his emotions get triggered by these ongoing extra electrical impulses.
disability law advocate called me. said she talked to the sp ed coordinator who basically agreed that they should never have said anything about swimming without a meeting to talk about it. advocate told her that they really blew it because they took the most cooperative mom she has ever seen at meetings and lost her trust.... i felt a little weird that she told them that but it is true. She said she put them on notice that it didn't matter if I ever agreed to or was in on a discussion about his going home... a dismissal is a dismissal.
disability law advocate called me. said she talked to the sp ed coordinator who basically agreed that they should never have said anything about swimming without a meeting to talk about it. advocate told her that they really blew it because they took the most cooperative mom she has ever seen at meetings and lost her trust.... i felt a little weird that she told them that but it is true. She said she put them on notice that it didn't matter if I ever agreed to or was in on a discussion about his going home... a dismissal is a dismissal.
Way To Go, disability law advocate. Sounds like she's really calling them on the mat, play by play.
I get it that they don't get it... as in, schools don't even "get" the more normal issues we deal with - like Developmental Coordination Disorder (DCD). Problems that are obvious, physically measurable, with known interventions... I know schools where they don't even "get" the concept of "visually impaired" (as in, either you are 100% blind, or you are "not blind"). SO... if its any consolation... I don't think they are just picking on you - they really don't get it. (caveat: this does not apply to the principal and the others on his direct page... that's a different story!)
T
TeDo
Guest
Good for the lawyer on ALL counts. It is only fair they hear from someone besides you what is OBVIOUS (you being a cooperative mom). They are blowing it BIG time. You have to admit, what she told them has to feel good on some level....rrrriiiiigggghhhhhtttttt?!? Give yourself a pat on the back!!
