All good advice, and we'll see how it goes. Naturally, he came home last night, at a reasonable time after getting off work. Another thing I should mention is this: I do have an RO against him. It happened last May, when he kept coming over and demanding money and finally, the last time, refusing to leave and blocking the door so *I* couldn't leave either. This is one reason he was all over the place from May-November. Then, in Nov., he got kicked out of the place he was staying, with his former foster parents, and after a couple days of hanging out on the streets he called me and asked to come home.
husband and I agreed, and these were difficult child's conditions:
Enroll in, and attend, 15 hours of college classes; at the end of the semester you will have options such as military, EMT school, or continuing college.
Get a job.
Get your own cell phone/plan when you turn 18.
Pay us for the car and repairs; $1000 when you get your school refund, and $300 a month.
Be respectful, no violence, follow the rules, be a part of the family, curfew after work/midnight.
Pay rent, which we'll hold for you until you move out, $300 a month.
I typed up two agreements, which he signed after he turned 18, one for the car and one for rent.
He enrolled in school, got his refund, and blew it. No $1000 for us. He has been kicked out of two classes for never attending, as of two weeks ago, maybe the others by now. At the very least, he's down to 9 hours, have never seen him study or even seen his books, etc. He did make one payment for the car, out of two, and his first rent payment is two weeks overdue. No violence, but way less than respectful, staying out till all hours, overnight many nights, lying about everything, partying all the time (not here). He did get a job, two in fact, but not sure he still has one of them; and he did get his own cell. Pretty sure that his car insurance is past due, tho. And yes, we put the car in his name right off the bat so we couldn't be held responsible for anything.