Well, I am feeling simply desperate, and hopeless today. More and more, my difficult child is turning into a lump, a coach potato, and an unmotivated being. He has no desire to do anything, but watch tv and play games, and I am freaking out. How am I going to get him out of the house in the next couple of years when he has no desire to get a job, do school work, or even help a bit around the house??? Consequences, don't do anything but fuel him into a rage, and rewards are only minimally effective. He has been kicked out of every private and public school I can think of, with me homeschooling him between times. It has almost been a year of homeschooling now (actually an online HS), and he has developed a phobia of even the mention of going to "a class", not to mention getting "a job." I know some of this is due to his repeatedly failures in schools, his repeated rejections from his peers, and his overall issues - but it also seems as if he has just given up on life in general. Other variables in this scenario are that in the last month he has completely titrated off of his Effexor, and my Dad, (his grandpa) was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer, with a very short time to live. The Effexor seemed ineffective, but now I am wondering....and of course how does anyone deal with the impending death of a loved one, especially a difficult child. His grandpa and him always had a rocky relationship, which I think makes it harder for difficult child. He has said he is mad at him for the rocky parts of the relationship, and mad at him for dying, but yet he really loves him.....it is hard......and he was the "father figure" for many years. Anyway, any advice would be so appreciated! Yes, I have read Explosive Child, although I am considering re-reading it - and yes, I do think some of this has to do with being a teenager.........but good golly, I think it SO much more than that. He refuses to talk to a counselor, but I am working on changing his mind about that as of late. Besides that how do I get him motivated when he feels like his whole life he has failed, when he hates everything, and when he says he just does not care? It was so much easier when he was little and I could just scoop him up, put him in the car, and take him where I felt like it was he needed to go.