(((((hugs)))))
I am sorry. It all sounds pretty stressful. Why not let he who is out of clean underwear throw a load in? Your kids are old enough to do some chores, though it can be a hassle. Getting them to do the chores is a hassle I mean. There are ways to make chores less work for you, and to get them to help more. I would start by having separate laundry baskets for dark, colored and white laundry. Then when a basket is full they get thrown in the laundry. It made a HUGe difference for us when I did this. OF course husband and the kids didn't want to sort their clothesi nto the right bins. SO I made sure MY clothes were washed separately and let them wash theirs all together. It didn't take long for pink underwear to make difficult child unhappy and for a stain on a favorite white tshirt to make husband unhappy. So then the clothes were sorted and I never yelled or fussed. If it didn't get into the baskets? I didnt wash it and if it went too long not n the basket? I threw it away. Uniforms for sports or whatever I would hold hostage and the ransom was usually an hour's worth of chores. The kids offered to just pay me instead but when I wanted $20 they daughter the chores. They whined and fussed and drove me nuts with all of the above things, and when it got bad I made them run laps around the house. That used up a lot of energy, esp wth mom sitting there with a cup of coffee yelling "Faster, that one didn't count because this isn't walking laps! Good Job!" in my opinion this is a key to surviving with adhd kids because it uses up some of that energy.
Those are suggestions that worked for me. As for meals, if they like hot dogs and mac and cheese, that is fine. Otherwise, I found throwing stuff in the crock pot to be a big help.
What would your kids like to learn to cook? Ten or eleven is when my kids started their cookbooks. They periodically wanted to learn to make something, and cooking is a lesson that they will need for survival later. So I started having them make the hot dogs and write down the directions. As they got better in the kitchen, they made more elaborate stuff. I don't know if your kids are developmentally ready to use the stove, but they could make ham and cheese sandwiches and serve them with applesauce, carrots and ranch, and chips for dinner. Yes, it is simple. Call it a picnic at the table.
These are techniques to take the load off of your shoulders. Ones that worked for me when I was ready to use them. This might not be the right time to use them for you and your family. SO maybe they will sit in the back of your mind and in a few months or years you will be ready and you will think of them. Just remember that if the whole load goes on one set of shoulders you can't carry even half of what the family needs. The load has to be spread over the shoulders of the entire family, not just on Mom's shoulders. There is nothing wrong and everything right with having your kids do chores to help the family.
For an immediate lift, go for teh B vitamins. D vits may help if you have seasonal affective disorder and the lack of sunlight is a problem for you. B vitamins give you an instant boost of energy and are super helpful. I knew a bunch of engineering students in college and they didn't drink more coffee or cokes for finals, they took vit B. It gives you neon yellow urine, but it also gives you a ton of energy without the caffeine jitters. It is part of what makes those little energy boosters work, and a bottle of vit B is a ton cheaper than those things. Look for something with more than one B vitamin in it, either a B complex or even "super B" on the label. Most vit brands used to offer a mix of B vitamins called super B and they were different for each brand but they all worked pretty much the same.
I hope you feel better soon, and that maybe one day soon the ideas I suggested will be something that can help.
(((((hugs)))))