kt has had a few really positive days with good choices being made & a lot of "stop & thinks". It's been a lot of hard work getting her to slow her little body down to think things through. Having said that, she is beginning to ask some very specific abuse related questions - therapist prefers that we call him when she starts asking these questions & he will talk to her. I have no problem with this as I have no answers for kt. therapist asked kt what she remembered of her last incident where she had to go to the hospital & have her hand & head x-rayed. He asked kt if she remembered what started it, if she was aware that she was hurting herself & when she first starting remembering again. As usual, kt has absolutely no memory of the incident & the hour or so before it began. He's pushing for kt to learn body awareness before going to that level of dissociation. While using EMDR, he's very gently trying to teach kt to recognize the feelings in her body when she feels that anxious & scared. Then to ask for help before she begins to start self harming. A lot to ask of an almost 13 year old; but the fact that kt is questioning the abuse that occurred when she was a baby is a good indicator. therapist said she wouldn't ask if she couldn't tolerate the answer. It's an intrinsic survival technique. On a side note, kt went out with Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) worker last evening after dinner & made a couple of "normal friends, mom". Cracked me up. Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) worker faded into the background & let kt play, ready to step in if necessary.