This seems very odd to me. Have you discussed the results of your neuropsychologist testing with them or something? I would think HIPPAA would prevent them from getting this info with-o your express written permission or a court order - and I am SURE that you would have to know about the court proceedings. Other than knowing about this, and thinking that the "dementia" would have you doing dangerous things with/for the tweedles, I cannot fathom why they thing that this is a "good" idea.
I am assuming that TPR means terminating your parental rights. If it is something else, please let me know.
Exactly WHAT message are the Tweedles to get from this legal action?? They had abusive birth parents who damaged them horribly and then they were taken away and I assume in foster care for a while. Then they were adopted and the work began to help them heal. You developed severe health issues that were/are very scary for them - at times they were unsure if you would live or die and they still have to handle your continuing handicaps and health issues. Your husband went off the rails and then died. This left them feeling even more abandoned and scared.
NOW they are supposed to have no or little lasting damage done by having their legal connection with you terminated??? Simply because you have ongoing health problems??? WTF are these people smoking??? Can they pass the crack pipe so this makes sense to the rest of us??
Regardless of whether or not you want to or are able to be their guardian after they are 18, terminating your parental rights will damage these children unspeakably. How are they to NOT feel abandoned by this?? How is this to NOT send them both into major problems??
in my opinion this is a time when you need to get your advocates involved, as well as your attorney. This is being done because you have ongoing health problems and handicaps that impair your ability to function. They need to provide supports for you to continue to parent the Tweedles, NOT a time when they need to abuse you and the kids by severing your legal connection. If you had been born with these issues they would have had to provide supports and accomodations for your children, and possibly GAL's, but severing your rights would NOT be considered because your parental rights are usually paramount in legal matters.
in my opinion this is a way they are attempting to take advantage of you and your current health issues. I do NOT think it is a good idea, nor would I trust ANY guarantees they make about kt staying with you or you being allowed contact with either one of the Tweedles. They surely would stop providing supports in your home - and most likely would move kt somewhere with more kids who receive services so it would be 'cost effective'.
This raises SO MANY red flags in my mind. How would you advocate for the kids after your rights are terminated, should they need your help? You would have no legal rights, and they could not give you permission to see records via HIPPAA or anything else because they would not have the right to do so as someone else would be their legal guardians.
PLEASE contact your advocate(s) and your lawyer ASAP regarding this. in my opinion this needs to be quashed ASAP before the kids hear about it because it will do HUGE damage to them. Heck, it would harm ANY child to have their parents legally taken away out of the clear blue sky.
I am so sorry they are trying to do this to you.