The Golden Rule of difficult child Parenting...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by AnnieO, Nov 20, 2013.

  1. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    ...Ignore at your own peril! And that is... TAKE CARE OF YOU FIRST!

    ...Because if you don't... Who will take care of the others?

    A few weeks back I had a funny jaw-popping pain, with an earache. After a few days, it went away. But I felt like I had water in my ear. Then that too went away. A week or so later I had one night where I felt HORRIBLE and then I was fine again. Then... about 2 weeks ago Rose's nose started running, and she got a cold... I was about a day behind. She started getting better - I started getting worse.

    I finally went to the doctor yesterday. Double ear infection that had healed on its own but drained into my bronchial tubes... Leading to... Sinusitis, bronchitis, and I was wheezing... And if I'd waited a few more days, I could've gone straight to the hospital with pneumonia! (According to the lecture I got.)

    So reminder... Take care of YOU first. Always.
  2. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    Oh My, I hope you are feeling better. And a great reminder. And one I need to remind myself.
  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Oh, Annie, I'm glad you are finally better at your house. And what good advice!!!
  4. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Yup, much better. Amazing what that first dose of azithromycin, a bit of codeine and phenergan, and an inhaler will do!

    Seriously, though. Our difficult children always seem to ramp up worse just when we can't take any more... And we ignore our own well being for theirs... And then? All hell breaks loose.
  5. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Ummm... you can drop the "difficult child" out of your title, in my opinion.
    This is "The Golden Rule of PARENTING"... difficult child or otherwise!
  6. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Very good advice. It's something I still haven't put into practice but need to. I hope you are feeling better.
  7. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Very good advice; I really hope you are feeling better soonest!
  8. Star*

    Star* call 911

    And WHERE is MUSTANGs GET THE TO A PHYSICIAN??????? (lord have mercy I leave for one little sabbatical to fall apart and I return to this......mumbles off with cup of coffee and looking for coupons for Kleenex to send to the Queen of Rosey Noses)
    Feel Well Dear............thou needest strength to holdest thine family together when it falleth aparteth...Although not being able to hear 1/2 of what's going on could have it's advantages.
  9. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Not everyone has physical pain with an ear infection. Now you know that from experience.

    Glad you finally did go see a doctor. (I'm one to talk right? lol ) Hope you're better soon.
  10. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Feeling a LOT better, however the codeine/phenergan cough syrup isn't doing its job... But the sinuses feel better and therefore I don't cough as much because they aren't draining as much.

    The inhaler thing? OMG that powder tastes HORRID! I got a tiny taste last night and I know why they say to rinse your mouth after! UGH!
  11. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    I'm glad things are taking a turn for the better. Good advice!
  12. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    The up side is at least you weren't feeling miserable for your ear infections. Glad you got to a dr before it got worse.
  13. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Very true Liahona! I had an earache about a month or six weeks ago... Lasted a few days then my jaw popped and I was fine. Odd, eh? Then I had one day, late October where I felt positively horrid. Fine the next day.

    So that was probably it... Likely why I went downhill so fast when I caught Rose's cold. (by the way, Shari, Flutterby, Steely and Buddy told me to go to the doctor with the earache and I didn't... So they get to say "I told you so".)
  14. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    The main reason to rinse after inhalers is NOT the taste. That is a benefit because it makes you rinse. You need to GARGLE for 30 seconds (20 seconds is one round of old macdonald had a farm) or it will tear apart your vocal cords. I have an aunt who likes to sing at church an darn near lost her ability to sing or speak at any volume because she also has asthma and refused to rinse after using her inhaler. It isn't good enough to just rinse, gargling will get it off your vocal cords and areas where just rinsing won't. It took a very short time to create big problems for her.

    Your main point, to look after yourself first, is more critical than you know. I didn't do this for years. Even right after surgery I didn't take the full amt of time to recover before I was doing with kids, or back at work when working, or down and dirty having to restrain Wiz in a rage. About six years ago my body said NO. NO NO NO I WON"T WON"T WON"T. and it quit. doing almost ANYTHING was incredibly, excruciatingly painful. My muscles would spasm for weeks at a time. Think of the charley horse that wakes you in the middle of the night. Now imagine your body doing that all over and staying that tight for weeks. My skin practically disintegrated in spots, and in other places the nerves freaked and I itched down deep in the bone to the point I would scratch so deep it took WEEKS to heal and sometimes was so deep they wanted to do stitches but couldn't because it was so long and wide. I would go to sleep with socks taped on my hands and wake up with them off and bits of tissue under my nails. Even walking out to the car was a true ordeal, and the motion of the car made me vomit. Try dealing with a ride to a doctor 75 miles away like that.

    It has taken six YEARS to get my body to sort of calm down. I can now go out maybe once a week or so, and once a month I have to go to get my medications from my doctor's office and I do a sam's run. It still takes five to eight days to recover. And all of this is without the migraines.

    If I had paid more attention to me, taken better care of me, I firmly believe that much of this would not have happened. Heck, my body would not even tolerate clothing much of the time. any band that goes around my body, like a waistband or socks or even sleeves that are not super loose, makes my body freak and start to swell. I have not worn a bra in five years because twenty minutes in one and I have swollen up six INCHES. If I wear a waistband, I not only swell, my digestive tract freaks out and will spend days in a spasm like you would not believe. I almost ended up in the hospital at one point because I spent over eight HOURS on the toilet because getting up or moving meant it freaked out again. I swear it felt like it wanted to just crawl out of me from both ends. husband and my mom wanted to take me to the hospital but I refused because I couldnt be away from the toilet for even five minutes.

    PLEASE remember to care for yourself. I hate that I pushed my body so hard it kept me from my family, from things I truly enjoyed, and from the world. If I had taken better care of me, pushed others into taking some of the things onto their own shoulders, then my body probably would not have collapsed the way it did.

    The infection is a WARNING. Listen to your body and care for it. One of the things my body did during that time was get cellulitis. By the time I got to the hospital, they thought it might have progressed to sepsis, and they thought that I was very very close to either dying or losing my leg. They kept me on quarantine for five days and in the hospital for a total of seven days. I got LUCKY in that my infection responded to medications, but it cost me my teeth. the heavy doses of IV antibiotics ate my teeth from the inside out, and combined with the vit D deficiency that I have, well, I have no teeth now. I am adjusting fine, but let my body be a warning, please.

    I don't talk about all of this to anyone really. But I am telling you so that you can hopefully take better care of yourselves and you can avoid a reaction this bad.
  15. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Anytime anyone says "earache" I just cringe. If I so much as get a twinge I am at the doctor's. I only had an earache for a day and a half before I ended up near death from that meningitis and I still dont remember the fall of 2008. Well I do remember some of the I still say I got pregnant with the Trinity's monter tots and somehow magically sent them to her!

    Glad you are feeling better but about the inhaler...try and see if your doctor wont prescribe you a nebulizer. They work so much better.
  16. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Janet, I am forever grateful that you dreamed up those Monster Tots for me!

    Annie, I'm glad you're feeling better. And I reiterate everyone else's advice. A warrior with depleted resources has already lost half the battle. We can't be warrior parents unless we're in the bet possible shape, physically, mentally and emotionally. And if you let the physical stuff slide, the emotional and psychiatric stuff is not far behind, rolling down the hill and turning into a giant snowball that will sweep us under. (How's THAT for a mixed metaphor?)