B
Bunny
Guest
difficult child had his appointment with the therapist tonight. We were there two weeks ago and at that time the story was "no one loves me and no one ever has." Tonight that changed to "mom loved me to death until I was 5 and then her love started turning to hate and by the time I was 7 she just hated me." Anyone want to guess what happened when he was 5? easy child was born!
therapist thinks this is all about jealousy (which, of course, difficult child denies) because easy child is younger and, in difficult child's mind, gets more attention. He said that I spend 75% of my time with easy child, 20% of my time on my needlwork, and that he and husband each get 5%. Even the therapist thought that was amusing. According to difficult child, I do everything with easy child. We're always together. I pointed out that alot of the time that easy child and I are together we are out and about running errands and that he is always welcome to come, too, but he chooses to stay home. His reply was that he can't go on errands with me because then he has to go with easy child and easy child is an idiot that he refuses to spend time with. But, he'll spend time with easy child playing video games. It's not that he doesn't want to go with us, it's that he has to share me and he's not happy about it.
Again, the therapist is telling me that I need to be patient and that we are going to get his thinking turned around, although he did say that unless difficult child is willing to change the way he looks at things and unless he is willing to admit that I actually might love him, which at the moment he is refusing to believe, we're in for a long haul.
therapist thinks this is all about jealousy (which, of course, difficult child denies) because easy child is younger and, in difficult child's mind, gets more attention. He said that I spend 75% of my time with easy child, 20% of my time on my needlwork, and that he and husband each get 5%. Even the therapist thought that was amusing. According to difficult child, I do everything with easy child. We're always together. I pointed out that alot of the time that easy child and I are together we are out and about running errands and that he is always welcome to come, too, but he chooses to stay home. His reply was that he can't go on errands with me because then he has to go with easy child and easy child is an idiot that he refuses to spend time with. But, he'll spend time with easy child playing video games. It's not that he doesn't want to go with us, it's that he has to share me and he's not happy about it.
Again, the therapist is telling me that I need to be patient and that we are going to get his thinking turned around, although he did say that unless difficult child is willing to change the way he looks at things and unless he is willing to admit that I actually might love him, which at the moment he is refusing to believe, we're in for a long haul.