Ok, so this is long lol. You werevwarnef.
Pink, i was more like you once, although about different issues. I am also very much my own person but the older I got the more tolerant I grew and the less I felt that I was right and others wrong, with the exception of kindness and caring issues.
I dont define class. Class means something different to everyone. Class can mean money, nice clothes, a college degree, the ability to hold ones tongue (which I am better at now but never so great at), and some like me feel class, if it even exists, is the ability to be very kind, not gossip, quietly keep your controversial opinions to yourself, to react with a smile and grace. My mother in law to me had more grace and class, if you will, than anyone I ever met. She was beloved by all until her death. Never a cuss word, a mean comment or anger came out of her mouth and people were drawn to her. I feel people like her change the world the most, a parcel at a time.
Her ability to deal with a hard life ( her husband died suddenly at 46 of a rare disease and then she found out that her son, my ex, had inherited the same retched disease,) would have made most people either bitter or at least wondering why. Victomlike. Sad. Why me?
Not my Mother Grace, her real name. Nor her wonderful mother Ruth. They were poised, calm, spiritual women who never acted up. Ever. Who were so wonderful to all. I tried to copy them as to how to interact with adult children. I felt, even back then, that they were angels on earth. Never did they criticize how somebody dressed or spoke or behaved. Never did either call anyone a name, such as stupid, crazy, lazy etc. No namecalling in their worlds. They always had that look of peace and serenity.
To me that is as close as one can come to being a puzzling word to me, classy.
So i learned a lot from them. None of us can judge who has a high IQ and who is worthwhile. I cant condemn an entire person that I dont know because the person left one dirty diaper behind. We dont know the circumstances. It is dirty if done on purpose but that still does doesnt define the unknown person who may have a mensa IQ and be very nice. Maybe the baby suddenly got very sick...we just dont know. Not for sure. If we dont know, we cant truly judge fairly. Being messy does not mesn stupid anyway.
About clothes, never would I, and I have a mouth on me, EVER tell somebody they were dressed stupidly. Maybe people think I dress horribly I think there is a difference between having opinions and stating them in ways that hurt people. I wont do that. Just because I think somebody looks out of whack with my world doesnt mean everyone agrees with me nor is it my business to let them know how I feel. I believe strongly that grace, which is my word for class, is more about holding one's tongue than telling it like it is to me, especially if it hurts somebody. I deliberately try not to dot that What I think of somebody, if its not nice, it is none of their business. I am very accepting in general and this makes ME happy because I dont get annoyed by people who are different from me (unless they blow smoke at me lol).
I dont feel contempt for most people, not even my sister who called the cops on me. I hate nobody. I live and let live and know that one act of perhaps insensitivity does not mean that the entire person is a moron or stupid or below me. Nobody is below or above me. I believe we are all precious and equal. We all have gifts.
This is a big part of who I am or try to be. Am I as good as my mother in law? In my dreams...lol.
But I cut a lot of slack for people, even if they have a habit I dislike. To me this is the best way to live. To smell the flowers. To love all the flowers. To not put myself above another. To give generously, even in my thoughts. Can I always do this? No, of course not. But I try. I dont always succeed. But I do feel that what is wrong in this world is a lack of kindness and acceptance and love for one another, not that we need to belittle those we feel are not the way WE would prefer. That in my opinion causes nothing but anger and division. I also dont think life is awful right now, although there are many things I wish would be different. To me that would be war, bigotry, hatred, greed....but I cant change anyone else but me so I just try to practice my values in my life. That is all any of us can do.
Pi k, this not a potpshot at you otat all. It is just my own opi ion, which is hatdly u iversal or better than yours. To me, the things that make you feel somebody has a low IQ, well, i would never go there. The only issue I truly judge is those who have no empathy for the disadvantaged, the downtrodden, the needy. I care deeply and have never been close to anyone who did not care about needy people and animals. I also dont trust people who dont like animals and nature. I would have nothing in common with any person if he or she didnt have a heart for the less fortunate. We would have nothing to base a friendship on.
I dont think I am better than people who dont share those values important to me. I just am so strong in my heart space about these things that I have no desire to become close to somebody who does not share these values. Is that judging? Maybe. That is how and what I judge. It is not about little habits. I am different. I have always been very sensitive.
I do not feel my way of life us better than yours or anyones. We are all equal and wonderful. Yes, you are beautiful and irreplaceable and the best ever!
I am far, far from an angelic person but my wish is to be as kind as I can in this life and to return as a better person in my next life. Long ago I stopped being so outspoken that i could be offensive. Yes, I was like that long ago but I changed...for the most part. (Not perfect)
Ok, so I wrote another novel and changed the topic...lol. i will step off the soap box now. I am very much my own person and never followed the crowd and I never will. Not even the crowd here
i am me. This is me.
We all have great thoughts to contribute.
Light and love!