Hello everyone. This is my first post here. I am sorry this is going to be long. I am desperate. Sick to my stomach with worry. I will start off with this. I am the aunt of 3 kids. The mother was neglectful, the kids now live with my mother (their grandmother, of course), and my stepfather (who has been around my entire life). The oldest, saw the most growing up and remembers the most. Without getting into details, there was drugs, a mother that paid little attention, possible abuse from a boyfriend, and a father in and out of jail. A little more background- My mom now has legal custody of all three. All three improved in school and behavior wise (except for my niece- behaviorally). My nephew has a lot of behavioral problems, used to kick, scream, etc.. but he seems much, much better now that he is in a stable environment. He has episodes but nothing like he used to. He is on medication for ADHD. He is 10. My other niece is 8, and is as sweet as can be. She does misbehave, but quickly learns her lesson when told NO. My oldest niece is jealous of her because she thinks she is treated better.. but she just isn't reprimanded as much because she behaves better. This was the same situation for me growing up- my sister was jealous of me because she said I was "spoiled", but it just seemed so because I didn't cause so much trouble so I wasn't always in trouble... My mom is home with them full time. She has chronic headaches and is having medical procedures to try and fix it.. with time she may get better. She has depression also, but she sticks it out and is caring for three kids after she has already raised her own. My niece is 12, and will be 13 in a little over a week. She is exhibiting the same attitude and behavior as her mother, who was a very troubled teen and had my niece just before she turned 16 years old. The more my Mom tries to reprimand her, the worse she becomes. She listens to Grampy sometimes, she loves him, but hates my Mom. There is a no contact order from the courts against their biological Mom, the only time they can see eachother is at a visitation center. She is a horrible influence. However, a of last night they are "Facebook friends". And to top it off, my brother's girlfriend (who has also caused my family and my Mom a lot of problems) is reinforcing my niece's negative status posts, calling my Mom (Grandma) horrible names, saying she will go to hell for all she's done in her life, etc. Seriously. Because both my sister and my brother's girlfriend do not like my mom, they are cheering on my niece's name calling and threatening towards my Mom. Now, obviously this means my niece has Facebook- I know- too young. I didn't sign her up. But she is closely monitored and my Mom has her password (until niece changes it, then Grandma gets it from her as soon as she can get it from her). Facebook allows 13 year olds to have accounts, and niece reminds us of this constantly. Grandma deleted niece's Facebook last night, but neither of us realized it sent an email to the email address one logs in with until it was too late. The email told niece how to reactivate it which she did promptly. Now she has Facebook again. I've explained to my Mom (Grandma) how to block websites entirely, and install a keylogger to get her passwords if niece won't give it to her. Problem is she needs the password for both niece's email and Facebook in order to effectively deactivate it. Niece's best friend is a bad seed. She's already had sex and gotten drunk. She is 12 years old. My niece has had three boyfriends in the past four months. We worry she will be trying to do the same thing as her friend has. I live 1600 miles away. My niece was just here for the summer. She got home a little over a week ago and she's already causing trouble. I am ready to have her come back here and strip her of any privileges, find new friends and get away from her mother and other "adult" that is cheering on her poor behavior. Everyone says to take away her cell phone, internet access, etc. But myself and my Mom worry that will cause her to rebel even more. Long ago my Mom did the same thing with my sister.. my sister even went to a juvenile detention center. She moved in with my dad 1500 miles away and had to move back because he caused her more problems.. when she got back she behaved worse and 2 years later, got pregnant at 15. My niece is ADHD, is on Vyvanse and Intuniv... as well as birth control to regulate her periods. She has counselors. She lashes out. Calls my Mom names (Like the B****, C***), says the same things my sister says (like, suck my imaginary d***)...... What can we do? Please help. We're desperate here. Thank you!