judeegreeneyes
New Member
Hello-brand new to the sight, and not sure I am in the right spot so bear with me please. I have an 11 year old son who was accused of "initiating a clap chant" in the cafeteria and given a half day in school suspension by the new principal of his elementary school. While my son admitted to clapping, he was very adamant that he did not start it. No one else received any disciplinary action other than my son even though the principal confirmed other children were clapping. My concern is when the principal called to inform me of the incident on March 21st, she on the phone said that he would come home and say he didn't do it, but she is telling me he did. No other information other than how the act was inappropriate and he needed to be disciplined before heading off to middle school next year. When my son came home, he told me he admitted to clapping, but not starting the clap. He also informed me that his teacher who was informed of the incident asked him in the classroom in front of his classmates- what happened and why did he do this. My son said he didn't, it was started by someone else. To which the teacher replied- so what, I'm supposed to believe a student over an adult? And then his classmates (not just one, but the class) defended my son and said no, he did not do it. i confirmed this with several parents of children in my son's class.
I immediately contacted the principal and she was 1. annoyed at my call 2. beligerent informing me he did it while raising her voice during our conversation. The principal admitted that no further investigation was done despite my informing her of what I found out.
My son out of "respect" for the principals authority served his suspension the next day, which I now regret.
I since contacted the Board of Education (March 23rd, the day after his suspension) bc my son informed me after coming home that day he overheard the principal talking outside her office to another adult female about my phone call to her. My son was serving his suspension in the principals office. My son said the principal was talking to the adult and said "Can you believe his mother called and wanted to know what was being done to the other students?!? I said Ritchie is my concern. I'm concerned about Ritchie and what he did- he should be punished for his behavior!"
The Board of Education played the phone tag game with me and several days passed since the incident occurred. I finally spoke to a Board Member a week later and he was very indignant telling me how sometimes kids do things they shouldn't and can't "fess up" to their parents bc they are afraid to disappoint them. The usual child psychiatric. mumbo jumbo.
In any event, I went to the Board to discuss the matter and was told on 3/28 they would look into the matter and report back their findings.
Long short of all this, that was March 28th. As of 4/16 I had no response back. I sent a certified/'registered letter to the Superintendent which was unaccepted/refused, so I hand delivered a letter requesting a personal meeting.
I finally me with the Superintendent on May 3rd to which an amazing amount of "new information" came forward. The principal now claims that my son admitted to starting the clap (although no mention of this in either of our 2 conversations or written notification), was identified by two adults as having seen him do it and was a result on an ongoing history of disrespectful behavior towards adults (to which I had no "reporting" of this questionable behavior from the principal).
The Superintendent stands firmly behind her principal making it seem as if my son is "trouble" and this was a long time coming. She also told me that since I am his mother, it is understandable that I would believe my son and that "adults don't lie". She wanted me to inform my son that while his mother believes he didn't do it, this should prove a lesson as to what could happen if you partake in inappropriate behavior.
I am fuming mad! I know I will get no where as they are all in my opinion covering themselves and their acts. To say that two adults wouldn't lie, but a classroom full of children will is absurd!
Wondering if anyone out there has any suggestions as how to handle this.
There are a few other details I've left out. My son also had a personal item of his taken away last year in the lunchroom. District school policy is to return the item if it is taken away. My son had the item taken away and then watched as the teacher threw it away as well. She deemed it inappropriate and threw it in the garbage.
You tell me it doesn't appear that my son is being singled out & treated differently than other children.
Oh & another incident re: bullying. My son was cleared of any charges, but was brought up on potential "bullying" of a classmate. The classmate wanted to meet my son at a local park and fight. The classmate called my home phone and my son put it on speaker phone so I overheard the whole conversation. The boy asked to go to the park and fight and my son said he couldn't bc my mother is standing right here. The principal got wind of it and called to inform me of an investigation that would take place. The minute I informed her of the conversation and my hearing it, and that I could produce a phone record of the call, the charges got dismissed.
And get this...........the boy who was accusing my son had to go to counseling for anger management. He was in therapy after the incident and had to carry around a squishy ball and squeeze it during times of overwhelming stress and anger.
Am I the only one who sees a problem here?
Looking forward to hearing back from any one with suggestions!
I immediately contacted the principal and she was 1. annoyed at my call 2. beligerent informing me he did it while raising her voice during our conversation. The principal admitted that no further investigation was done despite my informing her of what I found out.
My son out of "respect" for the principals authority served his suspension the next day, which I now regret.
I since contacted the Board of Education (March 23rd, the day after his suspension) bc my son informed me after coming home that day he overheard the principal talking outside her office to another adult female about my phone call to her. My son was serving his suspension in the principals office. My son said the principal was talking to the adult and said "Can you believe his mother called and wanted to know what was being done to the other students?!? I said Ritchie is my concern. I'm concerned about Ritchie and what he did- he should be punished for his behavior!"
The Board of Education played the phone tag game with me and several days passed since the incident occurred. I finally spoke to a Board Member a week later and he was very indignant telling me how sometimes kids do things they shouldn't and can't "fess up" to their parents bc they are afraid to disappoint them. The usual child psychiatric. mumbo jumbo.
In any event, I went to the Board to discuss the matter and was told on 3/28 they would look into the matter and report back their findings.
Long short of all this, that was March 28th. As of 4/16 I had no response back. I sent a certified/'registered letter to the Superintendent which was unaccepted/refused, so I hand delivered a letter requesting a personal meeting.
I finally me with the Superintendent on May 3rd to which an amazing amount of "new information" came forward. The principal now claims that my son admitted to starting the clap (although no mention of this in either of our 2 conversations or written notification), was identified by two adults as having seen him do it and was a result on an ongoing history of disrespectful behavior towards adults (to which I had no "reporting" of this questionable behavior from the principal).
The Superintendent stands firmly behind her principal making it seem as if my son is "trouble" and this was a long time coming. She also told me that since I am his mother, it is understandable that I would believe my son and that "adults don't lie". She wanted me to inform my son that while his mother believes he didn't do it, this should prove a lesson as to what could happen if you partake in inappropriate behavior.
I am fuming mad! I know I will get no where as they are all in my opinion covering themselves and their acts. To say that two adults wouldn't lie, but a classroom full of children will is absurd!
Wondering if anyone out there has any suggestions as how to handle this.
There are a few other details I've left out. My son also had a personal item of his taken away last year in the lunchroom. District school policy is to return the item if it is taken away. My son had the item taken away and then watched as the teacher threw it away as well. She deemed it inappropriate and threw it in the garbage.
You tell me it doesn't appear that my son is being singled out & treated differently than other children.
Oh & another incident re: bullying. My son was cleared of any charges, but was brought up on potential "bullying" of a classmate. The classmate wanted to meet my son at a local park and fight. The classmate called my home phone and my son put it on speaker phone so I overheard the whole conversation. The boy asked to go to the park and fight and my son said he couldn't bc my mother is standing right here. The principal got wind of it and called to inform me of an investigation that would take place. The minute I informed her of the conversation and my hearing it, and that I could produce a phone record of the call, the charges got dismissed.
And get this...........the boy who was accusing my son had to go to counseling for anger management. He was in therapy after the incident and had to carry around a squishy ball and squeeze it during times of overwhelming stress and anger.
Am I the only one who sees a problem here?
Looking forward to hearing back from any one with suggestions!