Up & down....back & forth

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by timer lady, May 27, 2007.

  1. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    As you know, we've been on quite the roller coaster ride with kt. All over the place emotionally, mentally, etc.

    This past week has been hell on wheels.

    Having said that, I woke up to kt making breakfast this morning; my coffee was made & she had a batch of oatmeal cooking in the microwave.

    Who is this kid? Very calmly & matter of factly I said "so I see that 13 year old part of kt is here this morning".

    "Yup, mom. I'm here for the week. Little kt is sleeping. And we're all still kt." :surprise:

    In my mind this is pretty scary stuff. And it's how we've been asked to deal with this complex PTSD stuff.
  2. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    How do you keep your head from spinning so hard that it just flies off?
  3. Alisonlg

    Alisonlg New Member

  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    At least you've gotten a heads up on which kt you'll be interacting with this week. :wink:

    Now, how do I go about getting my kids to put my coffee on and make me breakfast???? :biggrin:

    My humor is a bit weird this morning. Scarey indeed. Hopefully this will help kt see that her overall growth is stunted in certain areas so she can recognize and work on them. (I'm guessing that's the point of addressing it that way?)

  5. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    sounds sorta like my oldest and my husband. I no longer even acknowledge ttheir "differents" - I simply live with whatever part of them is in attendance. What I have been having most difficulty with lately is my easy child.......she seems to be fragmenting. ACK! SOme days I spend my time with the 4 legged family members as best I can, LOL.
    Enjoy the 13 yr old kt while she is there. Oatmeal sounds good!

    adding: Maybe I get "even" with my husband and kids- some days they call me manic mmommy, some days they call me Hippie mommy, sometimes I am Nazi mama, so maybe I keep them guessing as much as they keep me guessing?
  6. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Hugs-it must be scary.
  7. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Lisa - I find your humor refreshing!

    It's been a good day with 12-13 y/o kt today. She was delightful & appropriate for the most part of the day.

    It will be interesting to see what happens tomorrow.

    by the way, the parts talk & such is all about the PTSD & kt developing a sense of self along with "integrating" all those parts. "They are all her parts & they make up kt. All her parts can be together at the same time & she will still be kt."

    At least, that's what we've been told.
  8. On_Call

    On_Call New Member


    At least she said "we're all kt". I know it must be scary, though. Enjoy 13 year old kt while you've got her.

    Hugs to you.
  9. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Now that it is late in the day...and not early on a Sunday morning...when it would have been inappropriate...

    I have to say, the title of your post made me think "hmmmmmm..."

  10. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    I think it's great that kt is recognizing the difference. That's huge, in my opinion. But, the whiplash from the rapid shifts our kids make....OY!
  11. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    Great idea. I will have to use that. "deal with who ever is in attendance." Instead of trying to make the same kid be present each day and reacting to who isn't there, I need to deal with who IS there. Great advice. Thanks.

    Kt sounds like she is maturing. Noticing the differences. That's a great step.
  12. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    I think it's great that kt said, "we're all kt."

    Some years ago I had to deal with a secretary who was Multiple Personality, and belonged to an organisation for those suffering the after-effects of childhood abuse and ritual abuse. It was scary at times not knowing who was running the office. She WASN'T integrated; nor did she seem to be making progress in that direction. I got the impression that our secretary was almost enjoying scaring co-workers because of the attention it brought her - nobody was game to criticise her in any way. Her MPD went way beyond different ages or personality; what I saw was extremely bizarre, almost outrageous in every way. While I know a lot of people really suffer with this, looking back I wonder if this secretary was playing with us in some way. Apparently dangerous personalities would emerge just when we'd asked her about progress on an important ongoing task, so we would be forced to drop the subject. It COULD fit, but...

    Kt certainly sounds much further along the road than our secretary. I hope 13 yo old kt is around for a while!

  13. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    We've been using the "parts" language with kt for 3 years now. It's almost a mantra "I'm still kt"; no matter if she's in the midst of a dissociative state or meltdown or using her happy "part".

    therapist uses all sorts of visual props to help kt realize there are many different parts of any person; that they can maintain their sense of self & permanency.

    He has a gorgeous set of geodes that are ugly & rough on one side & beautiful & gemlike on the other. Stuffed caterpillars that turn into butterflies; a nest of eggs that turns inside out into baby birds, etc.

    It all has to do with integration along with a strong sense of self & permanency.

    Personally, my worried part sometimes overtakes my cheerful part & I'm still mommy. :flower:
  14. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member

    Linda, I can not pretend to understand what you are feeling or when you worry or not. To me, this seems like proof of the interventions working. Kt being so self aware is a wonderful thing. I think it is hard for everyone to be self aware. Kt being forced to be so self aware at this young age is the scary part. But, it is not shocking given all that she has been through in her short life.