I'll share what happened since my last past, since it's a classic case and may be instructive to others. Peter Pan went to his therapy appointment yesterday and called me to "pick him up." I said I would meet with him in a neutral place but I would not bring him home. We met for an hour, during which he said almost nothing except that he needed my help, and when I said I was willing to help but not to house him under the circumstances, he bared his teeth at me, like a threatening dog. So I got up and left the coffee shop where we'd met. Forty minutes later, as I pulled into my office, he called again. This time his voice and attitude were completely different. He was on his way to look at a house share, walking distance from the town center. When he got there and met the housemates, he was really excited about living there. Called me to come over, which I did. It's not a house I'd want to live in--run-down, incredibly messy, pit bulls in the back yard--but I'm not going to live there; he is. The rent was the exact amount I'd agreed to pay for a month of getting him back on his feet. We went to the bank; went home to get Peter Pan's clothes and a small microwave; stopped by the grocery store to get a few starter items; and by 5 p.m. he was in his new place. This is not the end, of course--he still needs to get a job, find a car, start supporting himself--but it shows that when I stand up and walk away, he does manage to take the initiative that he couldn't/wouldn't take before. Hope y'all are doing the same! Thanks for the support!