klmno
Active Member
I was getting ready to leave work at end of day yesterday, after all that happened that I put in prevvious post and a week where drug boy and boss kept coming into work 5-20 mins late and taking extended lunches- which was one of the four complaints boss had relayed to upper management aboout me. Another complaint was that he said drug boy had reported to him that I was 2-3 hours late on that first business trip where we traveled together and that drug boy had to wait that long for me to arrive. That was BS. I was running 45 mins late, true, but made it up by drug boy going to lunch while I finished driving there and me skipping lunch. Drug boy told me he waited 15 mins. That was also the trip where drug boy had talked about bringing "stuff to party with" along and being afraid to take it to property or leave it in hotel room.
Anyway, to keep this aws short as I can, boss started talking to me as I was about to walk out at end of day. He said it was true that the Fri we had thaqt big blow-up, he had come to work mad and frustrated and did push to bring it up again and bring it to a head with client's rep involved. He apologized then said that I knew he was not the type of boss that cared if people arrive a few mins late or take a little longer lunch sometimes. I said that is true, or it would have been made clear long before I had been working there 5 mos. He agreed. Then he actually told me that when I blew my top after he'd started this that Fri, he got madder and concluded that I just didn't appreciate anything like that so he'd just relay all that to upper management. I said "ok then, you're saying tthat you wouldn't have made issue of these things EVER if you hadn't been mad and we hadn't had that argument?" And he said yes, that''s true. (That was the entire point I wantd upper management to know.) So I told boss then that appeared to be vindictive. He disagreed. Whatever. He apologized and I told him I aprreciated him owning up to it and apologizing and I apologized for blowing my top.
He said I should understand that when people work together, sometimes there are arguments and sometimes arguments are worse than other times and people can and do get very angry. I said I did understand (I've been in the work force over 30 years) and I could have gotten over our argument, particularly since he'd owned up to his part and we have now both apologized. What I still have a problem with though, is that when people have those arguments, it isn't supposed to turn into pulling out a list of everything the other one ahs done wrong the past 6 mos and turning it in as a complaint. If you;d really cared about those things, you wouldn't have waited mos to adddress them. He said "true". And I said after he and I had that argument, the difference is that I didn't call up management the next day and try to get him fired. (Mind you, he had just admitted that he had intentionally instigated that argument to begin with.)
So, he said he didn't want me to leave company and wanted to work things out. I said maybe we could do that but as I had emailed everyone a few days ago, I still feel the need to submit a written statement for my personnel file due to the fact that this list of complaints and 30 day warning from company has been documented and I don't that it accurately reflects the facts. He said if I thought there was one shread iof truth in any of his complaints then I should just let it go. He said "I striongly encourage you to let it go and not pursue making a statenment if you want things to move forward between us". I took that as almost a threat to keep my mouth shut but handled it calmly. I said things could still move forward as far as I was concerned but had to defend myself now that upoper management is involved. He said he''d just rel;ayed to them what had been reported to him- that could only have been referring to the trip drug boy and I took together. I said I didn't know who might have exagerrated facts or misunderstood or even might have lied but I was going to at least present my side of things and I am wooried about any company that pursues firing a person when hearing complaints without even getting the other person't side of the story. Boss tried to get me to commit to not submitting a statement to company but I wouldn't then he started insinuating that all he knew about that trip was what drug boy had told him.
Geez...I was there 1 1/2 hour past normal working hours with him going on and on about this. Finally, I said we are both tired, as far as I'm concerned we can take one day at a time for a while, I will also copy you on my statement, it isn't meant to attack you and won't be written in such a way that attacks anyone personally, asked him if he was ok now, he nodded yes and I left.
I'm thinking my statement needs to recap my understanding of this converstion. That way, boss can either own up to it to company management as well as me putting it in writing, or he can dispute it and keep dragging this along further. He apparently doesn't know that he's bordering on illegal activity the way he's going about things. They can fire without reason, but they can't slander a person or retaliate and cause a person their job and stay within the law, I don't think.
I also heard client's rep tell boss that he'd spoken with someone higher up in the agency because he could solve this and could have prevented it but because the way contract is written, he can't get authority to interfere in this commpany's personnel matters. At least he tried. Sigh.
Anyway, to keep this aws short as I can, boss started talking to me as I was about to walk out at end of day. He said it was true that the Fri we had thaqt big blow-up, he had come to work mad and frustrated and did push to bring it up again and bring it to a head with client's rep involved. He apologized then said that I knew he was not the type of boss that cared if people arrive a few mins late or take a little longer lunch sometimes. I said that is true, or it would have been made clear long before I had been working there 5 mos. He agreed. Then he actually told me that when I blew my top after he'd started this that Fri, he got madder and concluded that I just didn't appreciate anything like that so he'd just relay all that to upper management. I said "ok then, you're saying tthat you wouldn't have made issue of these things EVER if you hadn't been mad and we hadn't had that argument?" And he said yes, that''s true. (That was the entire point I wantd upper management to know.) So I told boss then that appeared to be vindictive. He disagreed. Whatever. He apologized and I told him I aprreciated him owning up to it and apologizing and I apologized for blowing my top.
He said I should understand that when people work together, sometimes there are arguments and sometimes arguments are worse than other times and people can and do get very angry. I said I did understand (I've been in the work force over 30 years) and I could have gotten over our argument, particularly since he'd owned up to his part and we have now both apologized. What I still have a problem with though, is that when people have those arguments, it isn't supposed to turn into pulling out a list of everything the other one ahs done wrong the past 6 mos and turning it in as a complaint. If you;d really cared about those things, you wouldn't have waited mos to adddress them. He said "true". And I said after he and I had that argument, the difference is that I didn't call up management the next day and try to get him fired. (Mind you, he had just admitted that he had intentionally instigated that argument to begin with.)
So, he said he didn't want me to leave company and wanted to work things out. I said maybe we could do that but as I had emailed everyone a few days ago, I still feel the need to submit a written statement for my personnel file due to the fact that this list of complaints and 30 day warning from company has been documented and I don't that it accurately reflects the facts. He said if I thought there was one shread iof truth in any of his complaints then I should just let it go. He said "I striongly encourage you to let it go and not pursue making a statenment if you want things to move forward between us". I took that as almost a threat to keep my mouth shut but handled it calmly. I said things could still move forward as far as I was concerned but had to defend myself now that upoper management is involved. He said he''d just rel;ayed to them what had been reported to him- that could only have been referring to the trip drug boy and I took together. I said I didn't know who might have exagerrated facts or misunderstood or even might have lied but I was going to at least present my side of things and I am wooried about any company that pursues firing a person when hearing complaints without even getting the other person't side of the story. Boss tried to get me to commit to not submitting a statement to company but I wouldn't then he started insinuating that all he knew about that trip was what drug boy had told him.
Geez...I was there 1 1/2 hour past normal working hours with him going on and on about this. Finally, I said we are both tired, as far as I'm concerned we can take one day at a time for a while, I will also copy you on my statement, it isn't meant to attack you and won't be written in such a way that attacks anyone personally, asked him if he was ok now, he nodded yes and I left.
I'm thinking my statement needs to recap my understanding of this converstion. That way, boss can either own up to it to company management as well as me putting it in writing, or he can dispute it and keep dragging this along further. He apparently doesn't know that he's bordering on illegal activity the way he's going about things. They can fire without reason, but they can't slander a person or retaliate and cause a person their job and stay within the law, I don't think.
I also heard client's rep tell boss that he'd spoken with someone higher up in the agency because he could solve this and could have prevented it but because the way contract is written, he can't get authority to interfere in this commpany's personnel matters. At least he tried. Sigh.
