Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by crazymama30, Apr 30, 2008.

  1. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    difficult child is a pain this morning. He is arguing about anything, can't or thinks he can't do any thing for himself, and is just too irritable. I finally sent him to his room and told him I would take him to school. This is a punishment for him, as he hates it when I take him. Unfortunately it is a punishment for me too!!!

    He has a girlfriend now, and a real one not a pretend one like he has had before. She has been coming over with some friends and they all walk to school together. This is just making me nervous. Am I being paranoid? He just seems off lately. He forgot his bike helmet yesterday, and I got in the car and took it to him. His buddies little sister came up to the car and his buddy kept telling her to be quiet. I wonder what she wanted to say?? I asked difficult child about it, but he said his buddy just wanted to hear what I said. Whatever. That has made me more suspicious.

    I want to get difficult child into counseling, but think he would do better with a male. None of the people psychiatrist reccomended are male!! I am just ready to pop.
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I'm not sure I understood your post...but your ten year old has a "real" girlfriend??? Although I know kids say "he's my boyfriend or she's my girlfriend" at ten, actually being a "real" one would scare me to death. I wouldn't allow it.
  3. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Hmmm... maybe there is something going on, especially with what you sensed about his buddy's lil' sis getting shushed. Can you contact the girl and find out what she wanted to tell you?

    And I agree that he's too young for a girlfriend! Real OR imagined!
  4. serviswithasmile

    serviswithasmile New Member

    So, I am not alone. 12 y/o "mack daddy the man" lives here and he has a different "girlfriend" every week. He's better lookin, smarter, and more popular than anyone in the whole school, dontcha know? (Or so he tells me!)

    We also, do not allow girlfriend at this age, but he continues to say that it is his girlfriend calling, etc. Thank goodness the middle school that he attends has no tolerance policy for PDA's (public displays of affection). No smooching or hugging or even hand holding. Works for me. I have enough to worry about when he is at school, I don't want to have to worry that he's making out with someone's daughter on the playground!
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I'm fine with hearing "I have a boyfriend" from my twelve year old as long as they stay in large groups where adults are around and there's no touching. I always check up on my daughter and give her surprise visits. All her friends say they have "boyfriends." But it's so innocent. When I pop in, usually at the rollerblading rink, the girls and guys are skating seperately or sitting at the tables, the same sex people next to one I also check her computer, e-mail, etc. with regularity. I know it's sneaky, but after having a drug abusing daughter, this one is monitored more carefully. If she "really" had a boyfriend, to me that means kissing and if that happens, that's the end of even the friendship. Of course, I can't know for sure, but so far, from what I've seen and read on her Messenger, it's pretty innocent. It's more like they're friends, and she has a lot of boys who are friends.
  6. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    difficult child does not use the computer, he has access but finds it boring. He does not have a cell phone. The only time they are unsupervised is when they are walking/riding their bikes to school. I guess that is why I wonder if I am being paranoid. When his friends want to play they come over here, or go on a bike ride for 20 minutes or so. I make difficult child take a watch so he knows when to be back. I asked him today more about his girlfriend, and he said they hug. That does not make me happy, but he denied any kissing or anything. He is only 10, and I am not sure if this is a "real" girlfriend or not.

    What it all boils down to is I do not trust this friend. The poor kid has an interesting family life, not good, and I think he sees more than he should. I know he is allowed to play the ps2 game grand theft auto. i do not allow difficult child to play that game, as I have heard it is very graphic. I have not seen it and do not care to.

    I think earlier I was too frustrated with difficult child and easy child, as they both had horrible mornings, and should not have posted. I was not thinking clearly so I am sorry if I confused anyone. Sometimes I confuse myself.
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    We ALL have mornings like that. I would worry about the girlfriend too. I know at the middle school my daughter (who did NOT have a boyfriend, and did NOT want one) was being groped. fully and completely. The school kept saying they could not monitor the halls. in my opinion - thendon't let them out in the halls!!

    BUT on the way to school, if the time is limited, maybe you should talk to him about choices?? And saying NO to friends?? Not sure what else to tell you but keep checking up on them!

  8. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Things are very scary nowadays. When Tink was in Kindergarten last year, she told me that she kissed the neighbor kid, who was in second grade, and described how they used tongues! My heart absolutely stopped.