Very Lost and Helpless

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by BroncosGal, Feb 24, 2014.

  1. BroncosGal

    BroncosGal New Member

    Hi - This is my first time posting here, or on any other forum site. I have been struggling to find answers to no avail, so I thought I would seek out some advice/help from here.

    My DSS is 10 years old, and I have been in his life for almost 4 years now. He was recently (last year) diagnosed with ADHD, and is currently taking medication. Some aspects of his ADHD include; forgetfulness, unable to multi-task, unable to concentrate, etc. He is in no way hyperactive, in fact, it takes a great deal to get him moving. Everything is done super slowly, and you typically have to remind him of what he should be doing as he is doing it.

    My concern is I think there is much more than ADHD going on, but everyone we have taken him too isn't really helping. DSS is doing well in school (A's & B's), and he NEVER is a discipline issue at home or in school (I know, I know, what am I complaining about, right?) Here are my concerns; He is very socially awkward, he lacks basic critical thinking skills, he is unable to perform tasks a 10 year old should be able to (tie his shoes, cut up his food, rake the leaves, get dressed properly), everything is a struggle. His fine and gross motor skills are very behind (can't throw or catch a ball, runs is a weird pattern, can't carry more than 1 thing at a time, etc.). I know the repetition is really good for him, and we show him everyday he is with us how to do these things and walk him through it, but he does not get any better. Most recently, the biggest issue is the bathroom. He took a long time to potty train and continues to have BM accidents to this day. He either waits too long to use the bathroom and ends up going in his pants, or he doesn't wipe well enough. When he shows me how he wipes it is very awkward and seems like a challenge. His dad has showed him the proper way to wipe, we have wet wipes in the bathroom, we take bathroom breaks, and we have added some fiber to his diet. We currently have him in Occupational Therapist (OT) to help with some of his fine and gross motor skills, and they have given us some at home exercises to do with him. I should also mention he has very low muscle tone and it is hard for him to sit still or stand up straight.

    I feel like there is so much more that he has struggles with, but I have already written a wall of text, and don't want to ramble on much more. I guess, I just want some perspective. Does this seem like more than ADHD? What other conditions should I look into? Am I over-reacting? His mom and step-dad seem to think he is 'just lazy', which, yes, he is lazy, but there seems like there is more going on. I love this boy with all my heart, and I will do whatever it takes to help him in this world. I just don't know where to start...

    Thanks for any thoughts
  2. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

  3. BroncosGal

    BroncosGal New Member

    I'm so glad you mentioned this! I have researched dyspraxia a bit and have brought it up with the pediatrician and Occupational Therapist (OT). So many of the symptoms fit my dss to a T. They both weren't able to provide a referral to a professional that could actually diagnosis him with this condition. Is there a specific professional that I can contact to get a diagnosis?

    Thank you for the link
  4. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    I believe that it is diagnosed by a neurologist or developmental pediatrician. Start with your pediatrician and ask for a referral in your area.