Wow what I day or the few hours have seemed like a full day.
I show up at the camp and they are in a Christmas show - he gets to come and sit with me outside and visit until the show is over.
I gave him his congratulations on getting to the next level and his new watch, as he was promised once he made this level.
Then the "What do I need to do to come home" stuff started up again... it would not die... he wants exactly what he needs to do to come home... He is doing so well, and of course everyone is saying to him how proud they are, but you have these little things to work on, just continue to work the program...
He wants a date... he wants a time frame, and exactly what he needs to do to get me to take him home... His attitude is good and he was being respectful and allowing me to talk... I just keep repeating, Son you will know when your ready to come home for good, and the first sign is when you do not ask me what you need to do to do so.
Then the counselor came out and saved me.... phew
He said he got his Christmas pass a full 12 hours for sure now. So he decided he wants to do his home pass for the 12 hours on this Sunday and then I can come and do a Christmas visit with him on Christmas day, Since most of the other boys parents will be here then as well. He said that way I can see you two times Daddy... I agreed to this, it was OK with the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and he is not only one doing it this way.. per the counselor.
In the office to talk... he has a long sad face, I could tell holding back tears... She asked what he was thinking.. and BAM
What do I need to do to go home??? I have done this and that and it just seems that no matter what I do it is never enough you always want more... (tears are screaming to come out) I keep my mouth shut... she explains just about same thing I have each visit.. this goes on for almost the whole hour!!!
I finally explain to him that my rule for Sunday will be none of this... I am not able to answer with a date on when you can come home... (I compared it to Bush not giving a date to bring troops home) it is not something I can do that will be a benifit to you Son.
We have another 20 mins to talk, and hang out, sad once again, I ask him Honey why are you so sad when I am here with you.. he says because I do not like it when you have to leave -
We walk out to the parking lot with counselor to say Good bye... such a sad boy... I felt an extra tight hug and I had to just walk away saying, I love you Justin.. I will see you Sunday...
What a long drive home this was...
I just can not seem to say the right thing... to ease his mind..
And he is trying so hard... and doing SO well - but still I know a baby in the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) we have more to go before "real World" would be managable
Add: Something else is STRANGE.. he does not seem to care about Christmas presents... he is asking for NOTHING not one thing (but a pair of boots a few weeks ago) not one word -
I show up at the camp and they are in a Christmas show - he gets to come and sit with me outside and visit until the show is over.
I gave him his congratulations on getting to the next level and his new watch, as he was promised once he made this level.
Then the "What do I need to do to come home" stuff started up again... it would not die... he wants exactly what he needs to do to come home... He is doing so well, and of course everyone is saying to him how proud they are, but you have these little things to work on, just continue to work the program...
He wants a date... he wants a time frame, and exactly what he needs to do to get me to take him home... His attitude is good and he was being respectful and allowing me to talk... I just keep repeating, Son you will know when your ready to come home for good, and the first sign is when you do not ask me what you need to do to do so.
Then the counselor came out and saved me.... phew
He said he got his Christmas pass a full 12 hours for sure now. So he decided he wants to do his home pass for the 12 hours on this Sunday and then I can come and do a Christmas visit with him on Christmas day, Since most of the other boys parents will be here then as well. He said that way I can see you two times Daddy... I agreed to this, it was OK with the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and he is not only one doing it this way.. per the counselor.
In the office to talk... he has a long sad face, I could tell holding back tears... She asked what he was thinking.. and BAM
What do I need to do to go home??? I have done this and that and it just seems that no matter what I do it is never enough you always want more... (tears are screaming to come out) I keep my mouth shut... she explains just about same thing I have each visit.. this goes on for almost the whole hour!!!
I finally explain to him that my rule for Sunday will be none of this... I am not able to answer with a date on when you can come home... (I compared it to Bush not giving a date to bring troops home) it is not something I can do that will be a benifit to you Son.
We have another 20 mins to talk, and hang out, sad once again, I ask him Honey why are you so sad when I am here with you.. he says because I do not like it when you have to leave -
We walk out to the parking lot with counselor to say Good bye... such a sad boy... I felt an extra tight hug and I had to just walk away saying, I love you Justin.. I will see you Sunday...
What a long drive home this was...
I just can not seem to say the right thing... to ease his mind..
And he is trying so hard... and doing SO well - but still I know a baby in the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) we have more to go before "real World" would be managable
Add: Something else is STRANGE.. he does not seem to care about Christmas presents... he is asking for NOTHING not one thing (but a pair of boots a few weeks ago) not one word -