hi. i have a 5 1/2 year old son and also a 10 year old daughter and 12 year old son. thank god only the third one is difficult to live with. we have just started the process of having him assessed at an anxiety clinic at a children's hospital and the indications that i have been given is that there is no real underlying diagnosis to his explosive/inflexible behavior at this point in time. this leaves me feeling slightly reassured but overwhelmingly helpless with the day to day fighting/anger/not compliance. my son has hurt a few children in the school setting in very impulsive/explosive ways in retaliation from feeling insulted or invaded (physical boundary issues). he is no longer in that school because the daily anxiety became too much for me and it was more of a supplementary school rather than his main one. he is now being 'shadowed' in his morning school and that has helped but we still have daily battles regarding waking up, getting dressed, going to school, separation at school, eating meals, going to bed and the list goes on. we all walk on eggshells around him for the fear of setting him off. he can be unrelenting in his begging for something, destructive in his retaliatory behavior, verbally threatening to all of his family members. sometimes it feels as if i am in an abusive relationship that i cannot get out of because i am his mother! i have concerns about things like; sending him to camp, which school would be best for him for grade one (public/private/Montessori?). he is bright and very articulate about his feelings. he has said things like 'my brain makes me do bad stuff' and that 'my brain is more powerful than me'. it makes me feel so sad knowing that he probably has limited or no control over his reactions and super sensitivities. because he is so sensitive we never know what we will do or not do to set him off. not too much of consistency in his reactions. i just know that when i hear 'HEYYYYY!' i have a new battle on my hands.
i have read dr. greens book but not word for word. some of the material sounds too grown up for application to him. there is not much reasoning with him. constant power struggles.
i look forward to any suggestions, stories , questions, etc. i would also love some tips on understanding the language on this site. ie. gdg? and how the threads work. this is a very new and unfamiliar process for me. thanks
me: 35, mother of three, stay at home , married, have good support in general but not with people that really have experienced an IEC.