We really need help

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by SleeplessIN, Jun 21, 2010.

  1. SleeplessIN

    SleeplessIN Guest

    Hi all. I will keep this short because I could go on and on. Our 14 year old boy has only been home two days out of the last 12. Keep filing police reports, they find him, then he runs in the middle of the night again. Loving, stable home here. difficult child says he just wants to be able to do whatever he wants to and hang with whoever he wants. (We don't approve of his new found "friends"). We are sure he is doing drugs but can't get him to pee in a cup and he shaved his head so it is difficult to get a hair sample!

    We need intervention fast. Can anyone suggest a boot camp or program that is safe? Have you sent your difficult child and how is it/did it work out? Please private message us because I know that you can't post facility names on the forum.

    Any info would be appreciated. Thanks!!!
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Hi there. A boot camp in my opinion is useless. I had a daughter who did drugs and she would have run away. Plus they don't really want problem kids there. I suggest a long term drug rehab. That will give him the chance to reflect as well as clean up. He could be addicted to something. My daughter was taking meth and I had no idea...I know, how naive of me...I believed it was just pot. But if he is always running away...it's much more most likely. You don't act that way because of pot or booze.

    I have just finished reading a really scary but informative book "Beautiful Boy" by David Sheff. You may want to pick it up. Every resource availble to you is in that book. I suggest you go to N/Anon meetings for in person support. What state do you live in?

    So sorry about your son, and you have lots of understanding friends here who have been there/done that.
  3. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Hi Sleepless, welcome.
    the advice and info from MWM is great. I just wanted to lend support.
    Others will respond later.
  4. graceupongrace

    graceupongrace New Member


    So sorry you're going through this. While a boot camp sounds tempting, it may not provide the help he needs. From what you describe, it sounds like you may be dealing with a dual diagnosis -- mental health issues plus substance abuse -- which can be difficult to treat because it's hard to determine where one issue ends and the other begins. I would look for a program that specializes in dual-diagnosis kids. Just my opinion.

  5. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    My son went to an excellent wilderness program last summer, and there were some kids there who had substance abuse issues. The program opened him up to the fact that he needed therapeutic intervention (which he never would have accepted before he went to wilderness). Following the wilderness program, most of the kids, including my son, went on to RTCs or therapeutic boarding schools. Since the end of August, my son has been in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) in Utah, where he is thriving. We found both programs through an educational consultant.

    I will PM you the names of my son's programs.

    Hang in there.
  6. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    I tried to send you a PM, but you don't havethe ability to receive PMs enabled. You would need to change that through your settings.
  7. SleeplessIN

    SleeplessIN Guest

    I changed my settings so I think you can PM me now. Thanks so much to everyone that has responded. I am trying to save our son's live and we appreciate your input...