Wedding Question

[susiestar]

If a family friend type 'relative' has a grandchild getting married, and you won't be invited to the wedding, are you obligated to send a gift? Family would like me to make something, but I don't know the girl, or her intended/baby daddy, and honestly couldn't pick her out of a crowd of three.

I probably would not mind stitching something, but her dad and mom did a LOT to keep me from even knowing their kids in spite of my parents treating her dad like their child for most of his life. It feels phony to invest so much of my time in something for someone who's parents purposely kept me out of their lives for zero reason that I know of.

Last time I saw her she was six, and she wanted everything to be either pink or purple. That is ALL I know of her.

Would you bother? I don't even think she knows my name, to be honest.

 

[DammitJanet]

My answer would be no but as i have been repeatedly told i know nothing about families...lol. I do know Tony felt no need to send anything to his sisters son when he got married even though we got an invite after we hadnt seen him in years.

 

[hearts and roses]

No gift. But for the sake of goodwill, perhaps a congratulatory card?

I probably wouldn't bother with anything at all. And not because of anything other than the fact you hardly know the girl.

 

[pasajes4]

A note of well wishes should be more than enough.

 

[Bunny]

I would not stitch her something. It's someone that you hardly know and you don't know if she will appreciate the work that goes into it. Send a nice card.

 

[InsaneCdn]

are you obligated to send a gift?

Obligated? NO.
When we got married, we received small gifts from people I hadn't seen since childhood... but they were still good friends with my parents, and the gift was recognition of THAT relationship rather than anything with me/us.
But that was their choice. There is definitely no obligation.
And doubly especially no obligation to MAKE something.

 

[AnnieO]

I agree with everyone else. No obligation whatsoever. Even a card, although nice, would be stretching it.

 

[muttmeister]

You are definitely not OBLIGATED to send anything. I card might be nice. Personally, I'd probably just skip the whole thing.

 

[rejectedmom]

A gift is what yu choose to give and you absolutly can choose to give nothing. I would probably send a card. -RM

 

[susiestar]

Thanks All! I am not going to stress over it any more. I spent about 3 hours looking at samplers online before I posted. That is more than enough time. If my mom wants me to make a sampler, she can give me some idea as to what the bride is like and some cash to buy the supplies and for my time.