Hi, I'm new here. Our son is 24. He works for our small family business and occasionally customers will pay by cash or make the check out to cash. We suspected he's been stealing some of the cash by giving customers alleged 'discount's and recently we found that he's also been cashing some of the checks made out to cash. We got proof today from 2 customers which really made it hit home to us. Our son is a thief, and he's stealing from us now, and probably has been for a long time. All along we've sort of been missing cash from my purse, or my husband has been missing cash out of his wallet but we always explained it away, or thought maybe we just spent it. Looking back I remember my son asking me where he could find a check cashing place. I asked him why he needed it but he said his friend was looking for one. He also mentioned one time that he found jewelry and sold it to one of the places that buy gold.. Now I'm wondering if any of my jewelry is missing. I don't wear my jewelry and I really don't even remember what I had so I can't tell if anything is missing. I recently put my grandmothers/mothers wedding ring in the safe so I know that's secure and that's all I really care about anyway. We asked our son (not accused) if he took any checks and he looked me straight in the eyes and said no, he wouldn't do that. We've asked him about missing money all along and he's denied taking it. He's so believable when he tells us that I feel bad about asking him. But he's been lying to my face all along. It makes me wonder what else he's capable of. I really screwed up with him. He was so dyslexic when he was a child and so anxious that I felt I had to protect him all the time, from the school who put him in regular ed. classes at first, and from life in general. I should have let him tough it out. He went into Special Education and all his teachers loved him and he did well but he never graduated. He used to suffer such severe anxiety attacks in school. When we asked him about the checks missing he denied it of course and then got very angry. At one point he left and texted me about how we'll be so much happier without him. I got scared because I thought he was going to kill himself. He held a knife up to his neck last year when he got angry at me because I insisted he sell his car for a higher price . We buy our kids their first cars, but it's up to them to supply insurance and gas etc. He could never afford the insurance so he sold it cheaper than what we paid for it. After he put the knife up to his neck I told him to go ahead and sell it. With the money he bought a lap top even though we already had a computer. I threatened to call the police when he had the knife but I didn't. I probably should have but I live in a small town and was afraid people would find out. He sort of holds us hostage with his threats and we keep giving in to him because of them. Honestly, I'm afraid of him but I don't know if my fear is legitimate. I lock my bedroom door at night and put something in front of it so he can't sneak in when I'm sleeping. I just don't know about him anymore, or know him. If we're nice to him he's a pleasant person to live with, but if we make too many ( what he feels are too many) demands on him he flips out and gets angry. The only demands we make on him are to put the garbage twice a week and mow the lawn. We're lucky if he puts the garbage out once a month. We're only 'allowed' to remind him once to put the garbage out or he gets angry and he'll do it when he's ready, but of course, he forgets. We try not to push him so he doesn't get angry. We're hostages in our own home. It's ridiculous and it's embarrassing to even write that here. I'm babbling on here.. I just don't know where to start. I read on here where at some point you tell your kids they have to leave. Is that what I should do? Should I try to get him to go to counseling first? I really don't know where to start. I'm sorry this post is so disjointed. I'm crying as I write it and I'm trying to make sense of everything.