Active Member
Nice to “see” you again!

How did school go this year?

His “Normal” amount of kicking, screaming, flopping but we made it :D honestly he didn’t even log that many hours of work compared to the endless hours it took but he’s so far ahead academically I didn’t even push it. We were busy preparing for the move and repairing the giant old house we bought. He defiantly has plenty of life skills hours for the year. He learned TSA has no sense of humor when you pack nerf guns and metal cars in your carry on :overreactsmiley:, that all the trees for 1100 miles on the highway look basically the same and just because candy is sugar free doesn’t mean you should eat the whole bag at once because stopping to :poop: every 15 mins is no fun lol


Roll With It
Well, that sounds like a LOT of life lessons at a young age! For the years where I had a child between 3 and 6, any time we left the house was referred to as "Potty Tours of America" because whichever child was in that age range just HAD to use the bathroom in EVERY store/town/place that had one. I got to know the bathrooms on the route between OH and OK VERY well. We would drive to visit family and we figured out which places had decent restrooms FAST!

As far as TSA, they are pretty humorless. In EVERY country. At least your son is little. My folks took Wiz to England when he was 16 or 17. He got searched extra carefully in the airport in London because one of the bomb sniffing dogs was just fascinated by him (ALL animals except horses are). The dog got sent back to training the third time it saw Wiz and wanted to go "visit" him. Of course Wiz got kicked out of the Tower of London because the crows followed him and landed on him. Some superstition about the monarchy falling when the crows leave the Tower resulted in Wiz being asked to leave. He didn't feed the birds or have food or anything.

I hope school is better in PA for you and your son. I have not heard NEARLY the amount of complaints about PA than TX when it comes to special needs kids. And I have been here a LONG time! I also live closer to TX, but have relatives and friends who live/lived in or near PA. Some had to work to enforce an IEP with a specific teacher or aide, but NONE who had the level of active efforts against an IEP that my TX friends have seen.

It is good to hear from you!


Active Member
It’s been a while! I didn’t even bother with the public school here and I’m glad I didn’t. My nephew is a year older then my son and is high functioning autistic. He the text book example of an autistic kid actually. He made it 3 weeks here before his parents pulled him out. The level of bullying is INSANE for an elementary school and sadly the teacher he had wasn’t any better. They were all informed before school started about his issues, where to get his IEP etc. and never made the attempt.
As for mine I signed him up with an online public charter school thinking it’s not quit homeschool but defiantly not as demanding as traditional public school. So far he’s getting by, not without tears and telling me how “stupid” the work is. He ended up with some great teachers that get him and are available to him pretty much whenever he needs them via webcam.

He sees a new psy tomorrow after being off all his medications for over 6 months now. He was up to 6 pills a day that turned him into a completely compliant little zombie with crazy weight gain. After telling his last psy NP that I was worried about him looking sad all the time her idea was to add zyprexa at 20mg a day. Luckily I know psy medications and told her she was nuts! No child should ever be started on heavy duty anti psychotics especially at that dose. He could of literally died from his BiPolar (BP) dropping on the first dose. I was looking to get rid of some not add more.


Active Member
Sounds like he's having a hard time adjusting to school. If he doesn't show those traits at home I'd think that he's just anxious at school. Of course, I'm not a psychologist but I know from working as an assistant teacher in the schools that a lot of the teachers just say this one and that one should be medicated, etc. When I was growing up, they never had that - putting a child on ADHD medication, etc. So, if you find a good physician to hear you, maybe that will help tremendously. I know it's tiring going from one dr. to another. I have a granddaughter who exhibits anxiety in school. She's 7 and still will not walk into school without her mother holding her hand walking her in or the principal walking her. She goes to Occupational Therapy for her intersenssory problems, but there are a lot of kids who do this and it's nothing really major. I hope things work out for you and you do get the answers you are seeking.


Well-Known Member
Staff member
There are some odd little similarities with your child and mine when she was that age. She is now an adult.
She was diagnosed with adhd around age five or six. She was diagnosed as Bipolar 1 around age 8. There were other issues too.

she’s adopted.

She got kicked out of a lot of pre schools. She was hyper and impulsive. She would run out of classrooms a lot. At times she was argumentative. Mostly with other kids. Never with teachers. And if another kid was very mean to her, she would be violent. She rarely started violence though.

I would learn your rights Re IEP laws. Politely, but firmly, insist. A certified letter might be appropriate.

Boundaries work. 123 Magic works. But now your child is getting a bit old for simply saying “123...”

this might sound a bit weird, but get help and support for yourself.

risperdal is a great / helpful medication....very helpful...but might be best if only used for extremely bad days (as needed) due to the bad side effect of breast enlargement.

using any adhd medication that is a stimulant should probably be used with caution and much observation.

you might consider part time work with such a child for the time being, but I wouldn’t stop working completely.


Well-Known Member
Staff member one point I partially homeschooled our daughter.
These were some of the best years.
Sixth and seventh grades.
Two classes at the middle school first thing in the morning.
Subjects I didn’t like and with great and patient teachers. then I did the other subjects.
it gave her some classroom experience and ability to interact with people her own age without overwhelming her. And it gave me some breathing room.
Looking through the paperwork I Discovered that homeschoolers could take up to two classes at the school and so I set it up this way. She could keep it together for two classes.

had I been healthier maybe I would of continued. But this was a fairly good arrangement for a few years. Not too much drama those years.

Later in HS she went to a private school that was ok with “difficult” kids. It was really ashame as they dumbed diwn many subjects and although she is a bright girl, she ended up with a lower quLity education. (Rather then doing this particular thing...maybe best to push for an iep and consider tutors too)
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New Member
I have a 3 yo daughter with the same issues. Nothing is working. I'm a single mom, in school, and working from home. This is my BIGGEST fear. My daughter has had issues since she was one and a half. Homeschooling is not an option. Neither is a private school without a fully encompassing scholarship. Counselors don't help. We've been to 5 in the last 2 years. Doctors don't believe me. We have an appointment with a behavior specialist in March. Cps has been involved twice. I pulled her from daycare and sent her to a babysitter full-time because of my daughter's behavior. She has the same issues there. I can't work or do my school assignments when she is home either. I have boundaries and rules. She knows them but chooses not to follow them. I've list two jobs already because of her behavior. I'm afraid I'm going to lose more.

She's smart. She knows more than most her age, but when you ask her directly, she can't answer. I'm about to re-enroll her in head start. I'm just so nervous that she will be kicked out.


Active Member
Sorry I haven’t been here in a LONG time!
we’re still doing online cyber school. He doesn’t like it but he’s passing so there’s that 🤷‍♀️
his medications have changed I don't know how many times in the last few years because of the ridiculous weight gains. Overall his attitude is better and there’s almost no temper tantrums :)
For everyone that’s followed along, it does get better with time or at least we learn how to parent these kids better. Either way it does get better 🖤


Active Member
I have a 3 yo daughter with the same issues. Nothing is working. I'm a single mom, in school, and working from home. This is my BIGGEST fear. My daughter has had issues since she was one and a half. Homeschooling is not an option. Neither is a private school without a fully encompassing scholarship. Counselors don't help. We've been to 5 in the last 2 years. Doctors don't believe me. We have an appointment with a behavior specialist in March. Cps has been involved twice. I pulled her from daycare and sent her to a babysitter full-time because of my daughter's behavior. She has the same issues there. I can't work or do my school assignments when she is home either. I have boundaries and rules. She knows them but chooses not to follow them. I've list two jobs already because of her behavior. I'm afraid I'm going to lose more.

She's smart. She knows more than most her age, but when you ask her directly, she can't answer. I'm about to re-enroll her in head start. I'm just so nervous that she will be kicked out.
You’ve got a lot on your plate. She probably will be kicked out of head start. They’re not known to be the best with these kids. Be prepared for it. Get her into behavioral therapy as soon as you can :) the earlier the better. I didn’t notice much change at first either but when you look back you’ll see it!
Start keeping a record of her moods and fits. something simple like a desk or wall calendar. Over time you should see the changes, good or bad.
There’s resources out there for you, you just have to find them and none of that is easy. Start asking on local Facebook groups for child psy recommendations.
call the local school district and ask the Special Education dept what resources they recommended looking into.
Search out community organizations for mental health, even if it’s for adults. They’ll know what direction to point you toward for children.
get yourself a family therapist or counselor. You may not need it now but when you do you have one! They may even be able to help teach you how to better parent a non typical child. And I don’t mean that in any negative way. If I've learned anything over the many years, it’s that a non typical child takes a non typical parenting approach that most typical parents will not come to naturally. This board is GREAT for general advice and ideas from veteran parents that were once where you and I are now. I’m forever grateful I found it.
good luck! And if you’re anywhere near PA I’ll babysit for free 😂


New Member
Hello everyone. I am new to this site, this is my first post. I have read a lot of similar stories on here about kids that sound like I could have wrote them myself about my son. Unfortunately I have only seen lots of new parent posts with the details of the problems but no follow ups with solutions. So this is going to be a long post but I want to give as much information as possible.

My son is 6 years old as of July 2016. He was full term and a big baby at 10.8 lbs. He is the third child and has 2 older sisters, currently 13yo and 17yo. I am married to his and the other kids father and we all live at home together. No drug or alcohol issues. No abuse or violence problems. We are you typical boring family. We are not poor but are not close to rich either. Dad works and I stay home currently. He hit all his milestones on time with no noticed issues through toddler hood. I did notice that he was very bright and wanted to learn everything. He knew his ABC's, numbers to 20, colors, shapes etc. all by 2 and was speaking in full 5 or more word sentences. Everything seemed fine and the only issue I noticed was he avoided eye contact somewhat. I mentioned it to the pediatrician but she wasn't worried at the time.

Fast forward to age 3-4 and he was in preschool/daycare. He was a difficult, stubborn and trying preschooler. I got the notes frequently that he had a "bad day", didn't want to follow directions, sit still, take a nap, temper tantrum etc. All expected behaviors for his age but more intense and frequent then his peers. and only happens at preschool. He attempted to run out of the classroom a few times but was meet with locked doors and quickly gave that idea up. Toward the end of the preschool year he was telling the teacher he was "blowing up the school, and killing everyone". that set off alarm bells and he was seen by a school psychiatrist. He said that he wasn't worried about his threats and attributed them to playing video games with mild cartoon violence (mine craft, spyro the dragon) taken to seriously by a small child. I was told not worry about him and he was just adjusting to being away from his normal familiar home setting with just me and him all the time.

summer of 2015 we relocated out of state to be closer to my brother and a much better job offer for my husband. Move went well, no noticed issues over the summer. No Behavior issues that seemed abnormal for a 5 year old.

August 2015 he was excited and eager to start school in a "real big" school. The first few months went by OK. on the color chart he was yellow or green most days and very few blue or purple days (best)He wasn't a model student by any means as far as behavior but he had a great teacher that was dealing with his not wanting to follow directions and mini meltdowns. Over Christmas break my father in law died. We went back to where we moved from for the funeral etc. ( he was cremated and there was no body there only an ern). I only mention this because it seems like the time that everything started heading south. He loved his grandfather and his time with him but he wasn't particularly close to his grandfather. he seen him a few times a week for less then 30 mins but he was a very ill man that had little interaction with the kids toward the end.

Back to school Jan 2016. First week back is when the phone calls started from the school. He was refusing to participate in class and disrupting the class. Then he was refusing to follow any directions from the teacher. I requested for him to talk to the counselor and a meeting with the teacher. Nothing came of the counselor meeting as she seen no issues with him at the time except his behavior in the classroom. The counsler and I decided that maybe the death affected him more then we knew and she would have talks with him etc. By the next week he was running out of the classroom and trying to escape the building to come home. The teacher and principal made a HUGE deal out of this which I think now made it worse. He was suspended for the first time for 3 days. (obviously that didn't help any). The next 8 weeks or so his behavior declined rapidly to climbing under desks and hiding. Running around the lunch room like a mad man, bolting away from the teacher. Trying to leave the gym to exit the building and toddler like temper tantrums for the smallest things. Again only happens at school. I had requested a IEP meeting, assessments but never put it in writing.

By this time I took him to the psychiatrist walkin clinic (not child specific and deals with A LOT of people with really bad issues). After 15 mins she said "ADHD and mood disorder" here is your adderall and ripserdal. that should "fix" him. bring him back in a month. The fact she said "fix" him immediately pissed me off. He was not some broken toy that need glued back together. He is a smart, funny, loving and caring little boy. That happened to also develop some behavior issues for unknown reasons. needless to say i never went back to that doctor. His pediatrician put him on tenex which kinda helped with the outbursts but didn't last all day and then snowed him later in the day if another dose was given. He also ran out of the gym doors again and made it to the parking lot next to school for the rec center. I had said if he wont stay in the gym stop sending him there but was told PE is mandatory so he has to go. I said fine send another teacher or assistant with him and got told its not in the budget. there where plenty of other incidents that at this time I cant even remember but always resulted in the "come pick him up and keep him home for a few days" call. At this time the school was doing nothing to help him and pretty much saying "you made him you deal with him".

The last straw in 4/2016 was when I got called to come get him from the office at 750am. Now he got dropped off at 740am so he'd been there an entire 10mins. I only live 2 blocks away so i was back up there in 2-3 mins. I get there to see my son beat red faced almost hyperventilating because he was restrained and forced to the office from the other side of the school by an assistant principal that's not even trained to use child restraints. All because he was being "mean" to the teacher, threatened to hit her (never did) and was throwing crayons. So throwing crayons put others in harms way so he had to restrained. but running across a parking lot of school grounds inst a reason to catch and restrain him? I withdrew him that day and home schooled him for the rest of the year. No medications, and no problems.

In June of 2016 I called the school board and told them they need to get an IEP going for him and a plan because he will be back for 1st grade in the fall. School board was great about it but the principal decided to wait until August. August came, I re-enrolled him and was told lets wait for the first week to see how he does. I insisted that was a bad idea but as usual was ignored. I took him back to the pediatrician and now started him on all day intuniv.

Day one and he made it 3 hours and was suspended. He was throwing a temper tantrum because he was called first and it escalated from there. I called the school board again and told the super what was going on. the Meeting was moved up until the next day and all the Special Education people where there with consent for assessment papers in hand. We went over strategies and interventions for the classroom but really had no idea what was going to work because again I don't have 15 6 year olds at home and he does not behave like this with me or anyone else outside of school. This meeting was almost 2 hrs long and he happily sat there in the school office with his tablet and talking to the front desk staff the entire time.

Week 2 he ran out of the building AGAIN from gym and they decided a para might just be a good idea until hes done with his testing. today is day 4 or week 2 and hes suspended again. This time he refused to follow directions and was sent to the counselors office for a "cool down". he didn't want to stay there and tried to run. the para blocked the door so he couldn't. he said he would kick her if she didn't move and she didn't so he actually kicked her. And she didn't move again so he kicked her again. then the principal came in and said he was calling me so he hid behind a chair. When I got there he was terrified looking hiding behind the chair. I told him come out and he did. calmed right down and stood there quietly while they explained to me what was going on. I went to leave with him and noticed they actually had campus security (which is never at this school) and a police officer there on the other side of the door. Seriously? hes 6 ! is he really going to over power and hurt 3 full grown adults? or they wanted someone to restrain him and a witness since the previous incident can still cost them a law suit.

At this point I have NO idea what he has! ADHD makes sense in the impulsiveness. but not the focus or hyper part. He can focus and can calm down if he wants to or has no choice but to. Asperger's would account for the limited eye contact and lack of social skills but he doesn't have most of the other characteristics of the disease. Bipolar don't fit because his mood is generally stable. He is happy at home and mad/frustrated at school. The only thing I'm left with is a possible social anxiety problem? And ODD. but I consider that a diagnosis of nothing but symptoms. Something has to be the cause of the ODD. and though he is very defiant at school he is not at home. he will test his limits at home but knows exactly what they are and gives up trying quickly. He is also not purposefully mean and spiteful.

I'm at a loss on what to do except keep him home with me homeschooling forever. I would like to go back to work and be around grownups again. Plus 2 paychecks instead of one is way better. But I cant go to work and be at the school everyday either. I'm a nurse and no matter where I work leaving without a replacement is NEVER an option. He is on a waiting list to be seen at a ADHD/Autism center for proper diagnosis and behavior counseling etc. but the waiting list is 6-9 months at this point.

I took him to his pediatrician this afternoon to tell him what going on and I'm beginning to think he doesn't believe me. He sees this happy behaved little boy in his office and I'm telling him about the monster that he was just acting like an hour ago. He took him off the intuniv and said he is going to try to get him in to a good behavior clinic or child psy asap.
I realize this is an old post, but it describes my 6 year grand daughter to a T. She lost her mother 6 months ago and lives with my husband and I. She can be difficult at home, but nothing like she is at school. She has a para and an EIP and they still send her home and kick her out. What worked for you? I am unable to home school her, as I am the one that carries the health insurance for our family. She sees a therapist once a week and school, grief counselor every 2 weeks. What else can I do? She has been diagnosed with ADHD and take medications for that, but sometimes seems like they don't work at all. We saw a big difference when we started them, but not anymore. I have an appointment scheduled with a child psyc. in a few weeks to help determine if the medications she on are right for her. We also are on a wait list for the our state university hospital to have a full evaluation done there, but the wait list is long.