A heart as big as all outdoors

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by susiestar, Jan 15, 2010.

  1. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    THAT is my Jessie.

    She mentioned casually that she had talked her best friends (group of about 4 girls) into being friends with S again. I asked why, given S's behavior in the past.

    S has had a really hard time this year, Mom. No one knew until about three months ago. S was just leaving school early to get her 2 younger sibs. Everyone was mad at her because she kept borrowing money and not paying it back. Finally a teacher figured out why. Her mom took off and left some money but she never came back. Her older bro took half the money and the stereo. She was taking care of her little bro and sis all by herself. Her mom had been gone for 2 or 3 MONTHS when the teacher figured it out. Then S and her sibs went into foster care. Her mom came back but she had been gone for almost 6 months. She was mad the kids were in foster care - S was supposed to make about $2,000 last the whole time and not tell any adults.

    So we are going to be friends with her. She really needs some friends right now.

    S is a child who has a gfgmom and gfgbros. One older and one younger. She used to dress like a hoochie because those were the only clothes she had. She acted like one too, but her Mom really encouraged those behaviors. That is why Jess was not allowed to play there. She was there after school once. When I picked her up because she called begging me to come get her, S was running around with-o a top wearing a waaaayy too big hoochi mama bra and a mini skirt. She was calling Jess names because Jess would not take off her shirt and run around in a "play bra". S's mom told me it was "so cute" to watch S and her friends "pretend" that they were dating college boys.

    They were in SECOND GRADE!!

    Over the years S was not very nice to the other girls. Her mom would yell at her if she didn't call boys as early as 3rd grade. The boys were not thrilled with this and one family had to get a restraining order. You could HEAR mom in the background pushing her to say inappropriately sexual things. this was reported to DHS but nothing was done. Scarily mom was studying for her Bachelors in Child Development!

    Anyway, on hearing what S had gone through, Jessie and one friend talked the other girls into being friends with S and including her when they chat on Facebook or go do things.

    I was so proud of my little girl. She really does have a sweet heart. Just had to share a good thing for once.
  2. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    Is S and her family still in Foster care? That's just a lose/lose situation. That's really nice of Jess and her friends to care.
  3. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Mother is trying to get custody. So is Gma. Neither is a fit parent. Right now she is at the Youth Shelter. It is an excellent place, very well run and supervised. It is the only way to keep the kids together. When separated the younger boy takes difficult child to amazing new levels and the little girl just shuts down. S is the only stable "authority" for either of them and with-o her they just fall apart. Such a huge load for such young shoulders. S is 14 like Jess.

    She has come a very long way in the last year. Realizes now that her mother's demands of her led her to inappropriate and dangerous behaviors for a young lady.

    Most kids at school are either avoiding her or making fun of her. One of the girls in Jessie's circle has threatened some of the boys to make them behave while the other girls have gone on the offensive against the girls who are being mean. They know that S is, underneath it all, a really sweet kid in a horrible set of circumstances. Apparently S became the parent because her mom brought home some really bad men. Her sibs turn to her because she started calling 911 while still in elementary school. To protect her sibs from her mom's "dates".

    This came out in tonight's round of FAcebook chats.
  4. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    Poor thing. I hope they can arrange a suitable placement in a stable home for her and her siblings.

    In all honesty, it's a miracle she isn't more of a difficult child than she is having gone through all of that.