A little ray of hope

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Origami, Mar 6, 2018.

  1. Origami

    Origami Active Member

    Hi all,
    This is in reference to my youngest son (now age 21), whom I previously posted about when he was more of a difficult child. He's matured a lot since I started posting about him about 4 years ago, and is not fighting and getting in trouble any more. However, he's been very slow to launch, and quit his last job about 9 months ago. He was supposed to join the Army then, but backed out at the very last minute. He was literally in the hotel waiting to leave for basic training the next morning when he decided he couldn't do it.

    So, despite my daily nagging for him to get a job, he has essentially been happy to stay in his bedroom, smoke cigarettes, and emerge to get food or hang out with his friends occasionally. My husband and I had taken away almost everything but room and board, and he doesn't have a driver's license so doesn't drive our car. But he manages to get his friends to take him around and bums cigarettes off of them. It's like he was just lowering his living standards when we took things away. He would claim to apply for jobs, but would never follow up on them to actually get one. He'd say, "There literally aren't any jobs here!" which is ridiculous since we live in a major city and there are Help Wanted signs around every corner.

    The ray of hope is that he finally got a job! I'm telling you guys since I'm not ready to tell my "in person" friends yet. I'd rather not deal with any judgements right now, but wanted to share the good news. He's very excited about it, and has made a list of priorities for his future money, including getting his driver's license reinstated and saving up to rent an apartment.

    As always, guarded optimism!
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  2. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    Origami that's fantastic! I'm so glad to hear it! :D
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  3. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    That's great news!! I do hope it's something he will like and stick with. Baby steps in the right direction.
  4. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    So happy to hear this news.

    Every step in the right direction is a positive move!

    It sometimes just takes that ONE thing to make a difference.

    Sending you rays of hope!
  5. Sam3

    Sam3 Active Member

    Yay!! It must be nice to see him looking forward.
  6. Triedntrue

    Triedntrue Active Member

    great news
  7. Billiesue

    Billiesue Member

    Great news! Glad to hear it!
  8. in a daze

    in a daze Well-Known Member

    I do remember you. Sounds promising! Keep us posted....
  9. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Good news Origami. A big step. Praying it works out for your son. A little ray of sunshine goes a long way.
  10. SeekingStrength

    SeekingStrength Well-Known Member


    Every step in the right direction feel so awesome! Thank you for sharing.
  11. LauraH

    LauraH Active Member

    I know how happy you and your son both must be. Congrats to him! Like everyone has said, baby steps are still steps. Wishing him the best in his new job.
  12. Origami

    Origami Active Member

    Thanks, everyone! He's there now for Day Two and said the manager told him he's doing a good job. I told him he's finally bringing honor to the family name! :)
  13. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member

    Sounds like a great beginning!
  14. Read the book boundaries. I think it will change your life it didn't mine.