My one son, Brownie (ADHD/ODD), never--or rarely--hugs me. Maybe his dad. It kind of breaks my heart. His brother, Bug, is a very snuggly guy, loves hugs, cuddling...which makes sense, given he's a sensory seeker, loves deep pressure, etc, and Brownie is much more of a sensory avoider, fussy, doesn't like having a mess on his hands, etc. We say it's like having a dog (Bug) and a cat (Brownie). It sucks when your kid doesn't really hug you except under duress (I mean, we don't force him, but sometimes I playfully ask for a hug before I'll give him a cookie, etc)--but my fear is that Brownie will think we love him less. I know he sees us snuggling and loving on his brother. I try to remember that there are different ways to show love, and bring him little things like snacks or arrange his stuffed animals in a way that will make him laugh, etc... But I still have this image of him in the future tearfully telling us that we loved his brother more.