Déjà vu over and over again

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by ksm, Sep 15, 2017.

  1. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    I wish this forum had the "on this day" feature that Facebook has. Two years ago, during the state fair in our town, oldest Difficult Child called in sick and didn't go to her CNA job. She wanted to go to the fair with a friend. She lost her job because of it. Fast forward to last year second week of the fair and once again she had a CNA job that paid well, she quit her job and was hanging at the state fair. Today second week of the state fair she calls to tell me her job was really rude to the marine recruiter who asked for her to be off to work at the booth at the state fair. She had told me earlier that working the booth was a volunteer thing she could choose to do. But she said when her job was rude to the recruiter and would not let her off at the last minute today that she just called in and quit.

    The only good news is he said that her ship date for Boot Camp is moved up to late October instead of late November. I really can't wait for this to happen. Supposedly she took this job working at a restaurant less than a month ago to get $ to get her car running. I don't think that will happen as she's been spending every day at the state fair and buying tickets for rides buying tickets for the evening show.

    Right now I really don't care. I should've put money that she wouldn't make it through the third state fair in a row and still have a job. I know even if she goes to Boot Camp for the Marines the odds of her completing it successfully are slim. It's not that she's not smart enough or incapable of doing it she just can't work towards a long-term goal.

    Ksm
     
  2. Ironbutterfly

    Ironbutterfly If focused on a single leaf you won't see the tree

    My 2nd son was in Marines-He has no regrets. Boot camp will make you or break you. I'm sorry she is living a wash, rinse and repeat lifestyle. Hopefully she will make it through boot-camp and it will be a life changer for her.
     
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  3. Crayola13

    Crayola13 Active Member

    The fair where you are must be much more exciting than ours. I don't know anyone who enjoys it that much. After I had been once, I didn't think it was that great.
     
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  4. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    How is your younger gd doing KSM?
     
  5. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    I think it's too early to tell it's just been about a week and a half. Her behavior at home is not raising any red flags she's been polite and follow through with chores. But, there's always a but.

    The other day she was late getting home even though I'd offered her a ride and she said she had one. When she didn't come home on time she said, well, her ride had to stop by his house first and she should be home shortly. Then she said he had to leave and pick up his girlfriend and was coming back but now she's waiting and he hasn't come back. And then some other weird stuff… Basically was an hour and a half late coming home and we finally had to go get her.

    The next morning are used a home drug test and she came up clean. Which is good. But I know she was lying about all the events from the previous night. It is what she does to get more time with her friends. And not all of her friends are people she should be around.

    I think I hate the lies as much as I hate the drugs. Ksm.
     
  6. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    Well the State Fair is over, folding up and heading out of town.

    Older Difficult Child leaves for the Marine boot camp in 35 days. Since she quit her job, to "work at the Marine booth" at the fair, she has blown the money she was saving to fix her car. On the day she was suppose to "work" younger Difficult Child was also at he fair, and she was never at the booth.

    Younger Difficult Child is at intensive out patient for three hours this morning (after an hours drive to get her here) and I am sitting at McD having a pop and free wifi. Later, I will pick her up, then we have to wait 3.5 hours for her psychologist appointment. Then, another hour to drive home.

    10.5 hours today...

    275 days til youngest is 18. In a way, she is worse than oldest. Because she is smarter than her sister. More adept at manipulating and gaslighting. Older just does stupid and impulsive things.

    So tired. But the end is in sight.

    Ksm
     
  7. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    It's my friends fault runs a close second to some guy did it.
     
  8. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    (((((hugs)))))

    Why do the last days seem to take so much longer than some of the earlier days? They always seem to go so much more slowly to me. I hope these days are uneventful for you. Probably too much to hope for, but I will hope anyway.
     
  9. Sam3

    Sam3 Active Member

    Ksm. I have so much sympathy for your McD wait time posting. These long days are just more proof that you are very giving parent. Especially since this is not your first rodeo.
     
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  10. A dad

    A dad Active Member

    What is with that fair that she always ditches work for it? A good plan will be for her to say I to employers is I will work well for you but not when then fair is in town.

    But seriously now what is with the fair is it that great?
     
  11. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member

    Guys hitting on her would be my guess.
     
  12. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    I think she mainly just wanted to hang with friends...

    To be honest...she hasn't kept any job longer than 1 to 3 months since she started working at 16. This year she worked for 5 weeks in Jan/Feb. and maybe 4 weeks in August/Sep.

    Like many people who has a history of prenatal alcohol, she lives in the moment. Can't set goals and plan ahead. She spent her money on the fair, instead of fixing her car. The same thing she did when she got her tax return this summer.

    Two days after the fair, she called and needed me to pay her copay to see the doctor for upper respiratory infection. And pay for the medications... Another de ja vu moment.

    Ksm