difficult child 2 has been at grandma's this week, as his sitter has been sick. (bio dad's mom's house). husband picked him up last night.

difficult child 1 and difficult child 2 rarely see bio dad, if they do, its usually cause we're visiting grandma and he happens to show up. This is what happened yesterday.

Bio dad showed up about 30 minutes before husband arrived at grandma's to pick up difficult child 2. difficult child 2 showed bio-dad his teeth, shirt, legoes, etc, all in all, great...on his own he referred to and called him Dad, which is normal now that he finally recognizes the man.

About 10 minutes before husband got there, difficult child 2 started telling a story and got confused...he was talking about husband but was fighting with
words. Grandma changed the subject which he went right along with...When husband then showed up, difficult child 2 ran to him all great, hugs, etc, puts on shoes etc and calls back and says, "Bye <bio-dad's first name>."

difficult child 2's at grandma's again this morning, and she told me this when I dropped him off. She thought it was almost comical. 5 years old and
has it figured out!! The story he was telling and the reason he was having a problem was in what noun to use, really obvious to grandma...but she didn't think bio-dad caught it at all. (By the way, all of bio dad's family are supportive of allowing difficult child to refer to husband however he choses. And he interchanges husband's name and "dad" frequently, no one makes an issue of it.)

When difficult child 2 is "on", he's on, and he knows what's going on.


call 911
Sound like the son has surpassed the biofather.

Doesn't it make you wonder what in the H you ever saw in him in the first place? Sure does with me. My son called bio for the first 5 years of his life because the name GOD was already taken. When we left, it took difficult child a relatively short time to get to know, like and trust my fiance. After 3 years of engagement he asked DF if he could call him DAD. And of course, DF was flattered...and he said "I have always wanted a son, but never thought I'd get such a great one." (referring to difficult child)

Kudos to your kid. He's really getting it.



Going Green
My folks divorced when I was four and my mom remarried when I was six. A year later my step-dad adopted me. From the time of the divorce until I was around 11, I didn't see my bio-dad consistantly at all. (until he started dating my step-mom.....long story there) Bio dad and step mom were at our house once when I was around 12 ish and I walked into the room and said, "Hey Dad?".........they both looked up and I about swallowed my tounge. To this day I don't call either one dad when I'm around both of them. (even, on one occasion, when I was in a car with one and on the cell phone with the other). Absolutely won't do it (my step mom gets a kick out of seeing the ways I work around it). Somehow I've managed it for 25 years! :blush:


New Member
My easy child calls SO "dad" all the time, but he does it accidentally. I think he wishes SO was his real father, but knows he has a real one living elsewhere (Lord knows he's not happy about it).

Have to giggle he called him by his first name on the way out. Hey, the bio dad has nobody to blame but his own self, that's the way I see it.



New Member
I agree with Star. Sounds to me like son has surpasses biodad. It's sad in a way, but thrilling that he has it so much together!