TerryJ2
Well-Known Member
I've seen similar notes but after a brief search, couldn't find them ... I am in a position where I am planning to tell family members (sisters, etc.) that difficult child is high functioning Aspie. As he gets older, people are noticing he's a bit different. When he was little, they wrote it off to his being a boy. You know how that goes.
Okay, I have to back up.
I haven't even told difficult child yet.
husband asked me why we should tell him. Say what? It's his life and he needs to know what's going on. He's not stupid. Am I supposed to wait until I'm on my deathbed and difficult child finds boxes of testing and medication repts and papers about himself and flips his lid?
I was hoping that the psychiatrist would tell him last night (he respects authority figures--one of our problems is that he will shout in our faces that he's "fine" and we're lying--we've been through this many times with-other issues) but he refused to get out of the car so I sat through the appointment alone. She talked about SSRIs and how he needs Prozac or Zoloft for depression and anxiety fallout from not fitting in (she read the report) but you know what? She hasn't met him yet. I think she's putting the cart b4 the horse.
She said since he's comfortable with-our regular therapist, he should be the one to tell difficult child.
That makes her just a drug pusher, but if she's okay with-that, then she can coordinate the medications and I will just lower my expectations of her. (I did not have the Zoloft scrip filled. We're thinking about it. Even difficult child says he's being overmedicated. )
So, onto the family.
I really liked Fran's post, informing people about what sorts of supports and attitudes and environmnetns our g'sfg need during the holidays, and I would not expect everyone in my family to read that, but am considering lifting a cpl things from it for clarification.
Last night, one of my sisters called while we were out to dinner. We had gone out for difficult child's birthday, but he had a stomache ache, so easy child brought him home early. He took the call but didn't give me the msg. I told my sister that I saw her # on the Caller ID (long distance) so called her back. She laughed and said she thought difficult child had told me and maybe next time she should be more specific. Uh, yeah.
She is very sarcastic and tends to make things into a joke so unless I explain this in detail, she will tend to minimize it and then when difficult child is 18, she will suddenly wonder why he is acting odd.
One sister already knows and she's good with-it.
My s-i-l actually came up with-the idea to have difficult child tested so I'm probably going to tell her; she's pretty good about that sort of thing.
I want to do this to make it easier for people to interact. I do not want to invade difficult child's privacy.
Ideas?
Okay, I have to back up.
I haven't even told difficult child yet.
husband asked me why we should tell him. Say what? It's his life and he needs to know what's going on. He's not stupid. Am I supposed to wait until I'm on my deathbed and difficult child finds boxes of testing and medication repts and papers about himself and flips his lid?
I was hoping that the psychiatrist would tell him last night (he respects authority figures--one of our problems is that he will shout in our faces that he's "fine" and we're lying--we've been through this many times with-other issues) but he refused to get out of the car so I sat through the appointment alone. She talked about SSRIs and how he needs Prozac or Zoloft for depression and anxiety fallout from not fitting in (she read the report) but you know what? She hasn't met him yet. I think she's putting the cart b4 the horse.
She said since he's comfortable with-our regular therapist, he should be the one to tell difficult child.
That makes her just a drug pusher, but if she's okay with-that, then she can coordinate the medications and I will just lower my expectations of her. (I did not have the Zoloft scrip filled. We're thinking about it. Even difficult child says he's being overmedicated. )
So, onto the family.
I really liked Fran's post, informing people about what sorts of supports and attitudes and environmnetns our g'sfg need during the holidays, and I would not expect everyone in my family to read that, but am considering lifting a cpl things from it for clarification.
Last night, one of my sisters called while we were out to dinner. We had gone out for difficult child's birthday, but he had a stomache ache, so easy child brought him home early. He took the call but didn't give me the msg. I told my sister that I saw her # on the Caller ID (long distance) so called her back. She laughed and said she thought difficult child had told me and maybe next time she should be more specific. Uh, yeah.
She is very sarcastic and tends to make things into a joke so unless I explain this in detail, she will tend to minimize it and then when difficult child is 18, she will suddenly wonder why he is acting odd.
One sister already knows and she's good with-it.
My s-i-l actually came up with-the idea to have difficult child tested so I'm probably going to tell her; she's pretty good about that sort of thing.
I want to do this to make it easier for people to interact. I do not want to invade difficult child's privacy.
Ideas?