easy child going to Prom....

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by PonyGirl, Apr 2, 2008.

  1. PonyGirl

    PonyGirl Warrior Parent

    This is ALL NEW to me! I think I am as excited as easy child is. And as nervous. Does that make any sense?? Here's the dilemma: He asked this girl, C, if she would go to Prom with him. She replied, "OMG!! Yes!" :laughing: And then said, "Just as friends, right?" :boring:

    He has liked this girl for years. She has always been friendly to him, and has always maintained the "just as friends" stand. Which, I admire her for sticking to her true feelings.

    And of course, easy child agreed, "sure, just as friends, right.'" But he's a guy and you know guys. He thinks he can change her mind. I told him, she is not going to change. You've got 2 choices: Ask someone else to prom; OR decide if you can deal with the 'just friends' part. If you can't accept it, then you have to let go, because she's not going to change. And you're just going to get hurt/angry/frustrated/sad.

    We went yesterday and picked out a rental tuxedo. She's getting her dress this weekend, so then we'll go back and pick out colors for the vest & tie to match.

    Any motherly advice for how I can best support/offer guidance? This is really a cool experience, and I'm so out of my element! I never went to Prom myself, and neither did difficult child.

  2. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Ponygirl, my easy child is usually in the same boat. He has a lot of friends that are girls. He may have an interest but he figures if he is a good friend that they will eventually change their minds. At their young age I don't think girls understand the true value of being a friend first. They want romance, excitement, passion and what they think is love. So far easy child hasn't gotten the friends to change their minds.

    We have always tried to teach the boys that your life mate should be a good friend first so that it has a good foundation to become a life partner and lover.

    Of course, this is the prom and not a wedding so I think he should enjoy himself, be friends and let things happen naturally. It may grow or it may not but if he doesn't try nothing will happen for sure.

    It was exciting to me to see easy child enjoy the rites of passage. Enjoy yourself.
  3. So Tired

    So Tired Member

    Pony Girl, So happy for you and easy child. Maybe friends thing will grow into something more, maybe not. (I have been married to my "just friends" guy for 26 years now, so you never know!)

    I was also so excited for my son when he told me he was going to prom. He had never had a girlfriend before this so it was a pretty big deal for us. He picked out his own tux which was all black and a hat. Not my first choice but he loved it. I let him use my '82 firebird convertible since he and his date did not have the $$ for a limo. My only dissapointment was that the girl (now his girlfriend) was too shy to come over for pictures, so I called his friends and asked them to get me lots of pics at prom. Divine justice, I suppose, for not letting my Mom take cap and gown pics of me at graduation!!

    So glad you have something exciting to look forward to and to enjoy!
  4. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911


    Glad you and your son get to experience some of the normalcies in life.

  5. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    I know you're excited. My pcson only chose to go to prom his junior year. The next year he only did the after prom parties. difficult child never went at all. easy child daughter went all three years of hs.

    We have a young couple here at high school that I am helping send to prom this year. She is a foster child. Has been her entire life and just a delightful young lady. He is pretty much on his own and has supported himself (and his family) since he was 15. They are seniors and have dated since 9th grade. They even survived a year apart when she was forced last year to move to another county and another school because of issues with foster parents.

    So....I went Monday and paid for his tux.

    She has a dress. We are working on the other stuff she needs---hair, make-up, nails..

    Someone else paid for the prom tickets.

    We still need to get flowers and dinner reservations for that night and make an appointment. for pictures.
  6. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    It's always fun to watch these things. My easy child daughter always went with a group of her girlfriends, which I thought was cool. They were not embarrassed to not have a date. They had a great time.

    easy child son...well...he goes to the max, much more than my comfort level. This year it was a VERY expensive show on the strip, then VERY expensive dinner, clothes, limo, and finally a few minutes at the dance. I refused to be a part of that expense, but he paid.

    When I was young you were simply picked up with a corsage, couple of pixs, then went to the dance IF you had a car. His folks took us. ;)

    Hope they have a great time!! Take lots of pixs!!

  7. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Wow. My junior prom, my boyfriend at the time went to another school. For mine, we went to dinner but it was relatively inexpensive. For his prom, we ordered pizza and ate it on the living room floor at his parent's house.

    Senior prom, my date and I went to dinner but again, it wasn't that expensive.
  8. PonyGirl

    PonyGirl Warrior Parent

    Thanks my friends for your kind words :flower: easy child was so funny when he told me the story of how he asked her. He had said he promised himself he wasn't going to ask her, because of the 'just friends' stand she's always taken, and then he just up and decided, what the heck! (Just like Fran said) If I don't try, then I'll never know. And he also said, he thought to himself, I'm just gonna ask her, and if she says no, then I'm no worse off than I am right now!

    He picked out a dark charcoal gray tux, with striped pants! Like zoot-suit kinda! Very cool. He tried to check with C ahead of time, to see if she had preference for "traditional" or if something different was okay, but she didn't pick up when he called, so he just went for it. He kinda smiled at me and said, "Well whatever happens, people will always say, 'remember when you wore that cool tux to Prom'!"

    We talked things over, and agreed that we'll keep a running total, and we'll share the cost at the end. I'm good with that, and can afford it thanks to my happy tax returns. :bigsmile:

    So now the countdown begins.....Prom is April 26!

    Thanks again, and I'll be sure to get pix & post 'em here!

  9. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I think it's great he is going and I hope he has a terrific prom night!