Somedays, like today, I truly do feel I'm losing my mind... or maybe I lost it a long time ago and just now realizing it! ;-) Tonight I went web-browzing to find info on ODD & ADHD together! The 2nd place I visited was here. Roaming around for 30 minutes or so, I decided to join. I soon discovered I was already a member! And apparently so for at least two years! LOL It's been such a crazy two years too! Today I hit the end of my rope - - - so I quickly tied a knot and wrapped it around one arm! LOL My young niece (7yo ADHD ODD ???) was getting rough, too rough, in her play. My 17yo daughter agrees they were just playing (not sure what) when my niece (DN) began slapping her in a playful way. She tried distracting her, to no avail; so changed tactics and told her she was getting too rough and needed to stop - and the next thing she knows DN takes a closed fist and pops daughter right in the mouth - HARD! This is a big problem as daughter is still recovering from a mouth injury and is very tender still. DN isn't even sorry about it - was laughing at it until I told her she's in big trouble now. She was only saddened at all because I was now punishing her for hitting daughter. DN has been so much more defiant the last few days - we're clueless about any reason. Sis just gives up on it all and whines about DN never listening to her. My kids are getting fed up with DNs behaviors and Sis' too. My FMS is flaring big time so all this is just adding to it more. It's bad enough that I can no longer just jump up and run to a kid screaming in pain like I used to - but to know that MY kids are way past this kind of thing and here I am starting it all over with my sister's kid plus my sister (who seems to knows nada about raising kids - tho she plays great with kids) and I wonder if I haven't just lost my mind in taking them in knowing at the same time there is no other option that would keep them together (but should they even be together?) What I need now is to make myself focus on what's needed for my DN, no matter how I'm feeling! I got thru 6 kids of my own that are all difficult children - so many diagnosis's & tx's, etc. But I was healthier then - I wasn't living in pain 24/7 - wasn't dealing with brain fog so often - and I can't seem to get my Sis to understand everything that's needed to deal with a kid like DN. I really feel like there's a piece or two missing in DNs diagnosis's - She was diagnosis'd with ADHD and ODD when she was just 3 years old... same round of testing also said she had an IQ of 126 (with-out any reading or math testing). At that point anything she learned was purely by osmosis as she was never still longer than 2 or 3 minutes. So I come here to try to figure out what's next - where do we go now? I've thought about counseling - for both DN and Sis. I've thought about more testing - that gets a bit tricky as we homeschool DN so having school do testing doesn't work too well - so then, who's to do testing? I'm a little lost in ADHD with-ODD in a kid this young. My ADHD kids weren't diagnosis'd until their teen years! By then we'd been thru so much that was like 'just another step' and no big deal. But, this kiddo is so smart too that sometimes I think I can see her thinking steps ahead of me! LOL So many times she seems to know exactly what's next - super fast reflexes. Not sure about seeking medications - for either - with-family history of so many allergies the less medications for anyone, the better. Welcoming any and all ideas tho!