Hard day

mof

Momdidntsignupforthis
well, just a hard day.

I was right, son lost his job, why, who cares I don't think he's being honest.

He is sick at girls house and low on money. He has not asked for anything, but his life is soon going to get very tough. He will get a job and make it or be homeless. Pretty sure her family has sucked him dry since few work, but also believe he was using the needle again.

Here's the bad part , lol. We will not assist him. I told him what is coming up he will need to deal with, the mission can help and they may want to hit a few food banks

Unless he calls with humility and wants real help, that's all we're doing.

Tough love sucks, but I know it's right. He's not in the street. He may go to jail, hopefully he won't deal, he may get work and squeak by.

But not with us. I will keep my home peaceful, drug free and safe for my two other boys who show no signs of any issues.

I will try not to let the grief overwhelm me, for I know I deserve better... it's a hard day.
 

RN0441

100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
Cyber hugs to you today and every day.

You are doing everything that you should do. He has chosen this difficult journey. He can and will figure it out.

You cannot sacrifice four people to save one. Your husband, yourself and your two young sons. I did that for many years in our own home. It doesn't help anyone, least of all the person we are TRYING to save.

Your son, like mine, has all the advantages in life but chooses to take the hard road. Why? I don't think I'll ever find the answer to this but I really hope I do someday.

They say everything happens for a reason and that is my silver lining.

He KNOWS you are there for him if he walks the right path and that is all that matters.
:staystrong:
 
well, just a hard day.

I was right, son lost his job, why, who cares I don't think he's being honest.

He is sick at girls house and low on money. He has not asked for anything, but his life is soon going to get very tough. He will get a job and make it or be homeless. Pretty sure her family has sucked him dry since few work, but also believe he was using the needle again.

Here's the bad part , lol. We will not assist him. I told him what is coming up he will need to deal with, the mission can help and they may want to hit a few food banks

Unless he calls with humility and wants real help, that's all we're doing.

Tough love sucks, but I know it's right. He's not in the street. He may go to jail, hopefully he won't deal, he may get work and squeak by.

But not with us. I will keep my home peaceful, drug free and safe for my two other boys who show no signs of any issues.

I will try not to let the grief overwhelm me, for I know I deserve better... it's a hard day.
I absolutely feel for you and the pain that this is creating. I also admire your strength to know what you need to do for you and your family. My son is in same boat, lost another job. He has not asked for anything either, and We are not helping with anything, except all the emotional support he can handle, which he is not utilizing at this time. You are right, tough love does suck.
 

ColleenB

Active Member
I am so sorry for your hurting mom heart. It is so hard when they are not doing well. It is like having your heart completely broken.... I get it.

Some days I cry and think I will never be happy again, and then other days I manage to keep busy and try to find joy in the small things I do have in my life. We are trying to find some peace now that our son has moved out but I do think of him all the time and wonder....is he ok? Is he using? Is he lying to me?

Thinking of you and sending some healing vibes..... hugs
 

Albatross

Well-Known Member
Aw, I'm sorry, mof.

I was right, son lost his job, why, who cares I don't think he's being honest.
This is the crazy-making part for me, when I KNOW what's going on but hope I'm wrong in spite of my gut telling me otherwise. It's "mommy sixth sense" turned against us. I'm sorry you had to go through the gaslighting again.

But not with us. I will keep my home peaceful, drug free and safe for my two other boys who show no signs of any issues.
Tough love sucks, but I know it's right.
Great on you, mof, for being the strong mom you are, to ALL of your sons.
I will try not to let the grief overwhelm me, for I know I deserve better... it's a hard day.
Indeed you do deserve better, and hoping that tomorrow will be. Many hugs to you tonight.
 

mof

Momdidntsignupforthis
Aw, I'm sorry, mof.


This is the crazy-making part for me, when I KNOW what's going on but hope I'm wrong in spite of my gut telling me otherwise. It's "mommy sixth sense" turned against us. I'm sorry you had to go through the gaslighting again.

Thank you, can't sleep and have died a bit inside, but am glad he isn't down the hall and I'm wondering what's up.



Great on you, mof, for being the strong mom you are, to ALL of your sons.

Indeed you do deserve better, and hoping that tomorrow will be. Many hugs to you tonight.

I love my sons too much to let one scar all of us deeply. Not their fight or responsibility, and my marriage is very important. Husband has severely detached, remember he does prison ministry... very aware.. sigh
 

mof

Momdidntsignupforthis
I am so sorry for your hurting mom heart. It is so hard when they are not doing well. It is like having your heart completely broken.... I get it.

Some days I cry and think I will never be happy again, and then other days I manage to keep busy and try to find joy in the small things I do have in my life. We are trying to find some peace now that our son has moved out but I do think of him all the time and wonder....is he ok? Is he using? Is he lying to me?

Thinking of you and sending some healing vibes..... hugs
Thank you. I know the lies are flowing and have a hard time with why they think as they do. Therapist says it's the addict brain, just doesn't work like ours. Well....sadly sober they have a chance, but the drugs snatch it fast.

Never did any of us want to be this kind of Mom.....
 

wisernow

wisernow
i am so sorry for your breaking heart. At times it feels like our hearts get broken over and over. Your post brought me to tears because I know how hard this stuff is. Stay strong, be kind to yourself. This to shall pass and the sun will be out again. Sending you many many hugs!
 

Littleboylost

Long road but the path ahead holds hope.
well, just a hard day.

I was right, son lost his job, why, who cares I don't think he's being honest.

He is sick at girls house and low on money. He has not asked for anything, but his life is soon going to get very tough. He will get a job and make it or be homeless. Pretty sure her family has sucked him dry since few work, but also believe he was using the needle again.

Here's the bad part , lol. We will not assist him. I told him what is coming up he will need to deal with, the mission can help and they may want to hit a few food banks

Unless he calls with humility and wants real help, that's all we're doing.

Tough love sucks, but I know it's right. He's not in the street. He may go to jail, hopefully he won't deal, he may get work and squeak by.

But not with us. I will keep my home peaceful, drug free and safe for my two other boys who show no signs of any issues.

I will try not to let the grief overwhelm me, for I know I deserve better... it's a hard day.
I am so sorry to hear this. It is truly soft love MOF you are not abandoning him you are enabling him. And you have every right to grieve. My hear is with you! Stay strong you are doing the right thing!

:angel3:
 
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