So 36 calls to tell me that his son told him that his mother said she is going to leave town and go far away with him soon. 36 called me to "ask your advice. What should I do?" I know better than to go beyond saying "You're a grown man. What do you think you should do?" But this is something that alarmed me. If she says she is going to do it, she is mean enough to do it. I have never been wrong about her moves. So I told him that he should document on the Wizard and call his lawyer to see if he can stop it now. This is not a surprise to me. It's something I expected her to do. Well, I just hung up on him, although I realize I contributed to it by scaring him. I guess I just should have kept my trap shut, even though I know that she will do it. At the very end of our conversation, in which he was yelling so loud, my husband could hear it from across the room, he said, "SO YOU ARE PANICKING ME! THANKS A LOT. YOU ARE THE MOST WORTHLESS, F****** MOTHER..." I hung up. I am shaking. And when she does run off, he's going to say, like he always does, "You were right. Now how are you going to make me feel better?" and he'll be in a rage and mean and scary mode until/unless he can get his son back. Sometimes I really wonder why I bother to talk to him at all. He is always asking for advice, gets uber-mad when I tell him he's a man who can handle things himself, and then gets abusive. True, he is pleasant when times are good, but life isn't good...it's full of ups and downs and he can NOT handle the downs without being abusive. He is almost 37. Soon he will be 37 when I talk about him, not 36, and it is sad that he still can't control his frightening temper, and, trust me, it is frightening when he lets loose. I really want to stay out of this one. When she runs off in the middle of the night, and she will, it will be worse than the custody battle. 36 does love his son. His son is his life. But he doesn't think rationally about what he has to do to protect his son. His son would be in worse shape with his ex. But, sadly, the fate of my grandson is not in my hands. I barely know him. I can't do anything about it. Please kick me for not saying, "You're a man and I'm sure you an figure it out." Even though that would have made him hang up on me, it would have been better than his ear-busting rage and insults that had me shaking. Maybae I get PTSD talking to him when he is like this. My God, this adult man is going to be 40 in three years. It boggles my mind. Thanks for reading. I will be at Al-Anon on Thursday morning, the first chance I have. I wonder if he was drinking. He said he'd stopped, but they always say that. At any rate, I need the message of self-love that Al-Anon delivers. I also fortunately have a therapy appointment. on Sept. 25th and am going to see if I can move it up. When he yells at me that way, I remember him cornering me in my house, not letting me go, lifting his fist and smashing the wall right by my head. I remember the day he slapped me across the face when I shoved his shoulder to push him back from me. He can be so nice to me, but when he loses his temper, he scares the bejeezus out of me. I know he is hurting, but at his age that is just not an excuse, is it?