I have NO problem with those who chose to smoke in their own homes provided it causes no health problems for the other residents of their homes. I won't EVER be rude enough to ask someone to not smoke in their own home - if it bugs me I will visit them somewhere else. I do have an aunt who for years would not let anyone smoke in her home when my parents, bro or I were visiting even though she and her husband were heavy smokers. we did NOT ask this, but she was around when my dad lost his father to lung cancer and it was her choice. I feel NO ONE has the right to tell someone they cannot smoke in their own home. Heck, I don't fully agree with the law about no smoking in restaurants. If a restaurant owner chooses to have a smoking restaurant, that is a business decision and non-smokers can eat elsewhere. It is part of capitalism, in my opinion. BUT I have a problem with smoking in places that people with health problems must go to. I smoked off and on, mostly when depressed until I figured that link out. Now I take prozac when I want to smoke and it works for me.
But cubsgirl is in a different situation. She has a health problem and that means her husband needs to not smoke around her or in the home. I do wonder if he has ANY idea the cost of lifelong asthma treatment/care? I have a friend who was in a similar situation only she wasn't the only one with asthma, both her boys did too. She found the info on the cost of treating asthma and made her husband get extra jobs to cover the increased cost plus 3x that amt for pain and suffering for her and the boys. Then he wasn't home enough to smoke in the house so it wasn't long before he decided it was easier to smoke outside than work that hard.
Rough, low end ballpark estimates of cost of asthma treatment in 1994 was $753 per person. costs were 10.7 billion dollars for treating 14.2 million Americans in 1995 (
http://www.aafa.org/display.cfm?id=6&sub=63) according to the Asthma and Allergy foundation of America. this is 1994 dollars, so costs are MUCH higher now, of course. This does NOt include indirect costs of lost work, lower productivity while at work, long term damage to children, lower quality learning of children with asthma problems, etc.... At least not as I read the site. I have a feeling that your husband would think it was a pretty expensive pack of smokes if he had to earn an extra $753 to cover the costs of your asthma PLUS an equal amt for your pain and suffering from the asthma attacks. Does he have ANY idea what it is like to ahve an asthma attack where you feel like you are suffocating even though there is plenty of air all around you?
This might be info that could help you state your case to him. Even if you don't need that much in medications this year, over a lifetime that is the average cost per year and it is pretty staggering to many of us. Not sure what medications you take, but here are some average costs of asthma medications/supplies if purchased with-o insurance: advair $285.99 per month, flovent $246.99 per month, $229.99 per month, proair (generic albuterol inhaler) $43.99 per month, ipratropium inhaler $37.99 per month, xopenex $125.99 for 25 doses, often used 2-6 times daily, etc...
maybe seeing this list of medications (all prices are from drugstore.com) would help him see another reason WHY he should do all he can to avoid causing asthma problems for you? I realize you won't use all of these medications, and likely have insurance to cover part of the costs, but the real cost of the medications, the retail cost, could be a huge eye opener. At least it would be for the men in my life. I have found over the years that presenting a dollar amount that a stupid behavior is likely to cost is an excellent way to get the males in my life to change behaviors.
Needing a sybicort inhaler and a proair inhaler (albuterol) because his smoking is causing an increase in attacks makes that cigarette in the bathroom after beer and a game on tv an awfully expensive indulgence. Heck, by smoking outside he might even be able to save enough $$ to afford to go and see some games in person rather than having to work extra hours/jobs to pay for your medication.
I hope that he will stop smoking in your home. Asthma is scary. I only have a "touch" of it according to my docs, but the only real attack I had scared me to death. I walked past a few smokers outside and almost had to call 911. I had one of thank you's inhalers in my purse because I always do and was able to use it and not need 911,b ut with-o that inhaler i might have died according to my doctor who was furious that I didn't go to the ER after using the inhaler.
And if he won't, try soaking his cigarettes in some noxious liquid or starching his underwear. Starching a guy's undies is a powerful message that Momma is NOT HAPPY.