I don't have a title for this post...I'm just having a darn hard time!

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DDD, Nov 29, 2012.

  1. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I've NEVER been a whiner. I'm a DO IT person. I have no intention of listing all my stressors but I could really use some caring support. husband is driving me nuts as he is back to drinking at the ripe old age of 80, God forbid. I have HUGE business problems. Ace is not receiving the attention and love he deserves. I am a November Whiner. I've gained 15 pounds just from stress eating (all organic!). Somehow I have to "get a grip" but....I'm feeling tired, old, sick and vulnerable. How's that for an ugly combination?? I can't tell you all how much I want to embrace a stress limited life and I swear it just is impossible. Sigh!
    Whine! Sorry...I just feel so x'ing vulnerable, it's pathetic. DDD
  2. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    DDD, geez, lotta stuff going on.................I'm sorry to hear you feel vulnerable, however, I don't hear any of this as a whine, I hear it as your life and right now it's hard, you have a lot on your plate and every right in the world to be feeling whatever you're feeling. It helps me when I can just tell myself that it's okay to have all these feelings, just accept what is, you feel vulnerable, tired, and disappointed that life isn't giving you what you want........I hear you...........it sucks...............yikes, it isn't pathetic, it's real................rant away.............vent..............throw some pillows, stomp your feet............I know exactly how you feel...............I'm sending some really big hugs right now..............and hold on, my guess is there will be more coming................
  3. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Vent away DDD...
    Wouldn't it be nice to see that "light at the end of the tunnel"? Some resolution forthcoming. I know that's how I feel right now. All I can see is being completely overwhelmed with no end in sight.

    Yep, vent away...and prayers for strength in the days ahead.
    Your friend always,
  4. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

  5. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Vent away hon, you've every right. Venting is not whining. They are not the same thing. We all need to vent at times, even the strongest of us, because otherwise the prisons would be much more full than they are presently. (lol)

  6. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    You do have a lot going on and you forgot the whole house hunting craziness. I know I felt vulnerable and old and weak a few months ago after my surgery and you are dealing with much more than I did. I've learned that when I start to feel that way I need to take care of myself because no one esle is going to do it. Tell husband you need help and so he needs to get a grip. Do whatever you can to destress your life. It's important that you keep a positive attitude. If I lived closer I would take you out to lunch.

    It's ok to need support. You have been so strong for everyone in your family for so many years. It's time they were strong for you.

  7. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    MORE HUGS!!!!:Grouphug:
  8. katya02

    katya02 Solace

    DDD, you're such a source of strength to people here ... when you need some support, don't think of it as whining! You have so much going on. Things that don't have a simple, immediate answer. Even the strong get worn down. It sounds like you're still being torn by multiple expectations from other people, yet you have your own health problems and difficulties and need some care, too. Taking time for yourself is NOT wrong, even if you feel guilty about Ace. If you get too burned out you won't have anything to offer anyone else. If I could offer one piece of advice I'd say, care for yourself. Build yourself up, your physical, emotional, mental, spiritual needs. These must be met. Others will get along in one way or another; usually they'll do whatever they were going to do anyway. You need to lower your stress - write down some things you know would be helpful with that. Put them on a list and work through it, adding one every day, or more. Make a schedule where you block out non-negotiable time for yourself. Don't explain, don't justify, just do it.

    I've been one who sacrificed everything, gave up everything far too long, sure that my all was needed to keep my family going. I now think that's a little off the mark. I think we all need and deserve to care for ourselves. You, too, you especially. Sending {{{{hugs}}}} and support, and good thoughts.
  9. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sounds like it is time for a Cutty, my friend. Have one on me.


  10. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

  11. Hopeless

    Hopeless ....Hopeful Now

    Hugs ddd!! It really isn't a whine as we all need to vent at times when you have a life filled with gfgness.
  12. bby31288

    bby31288 Active Member

    Oh DDD the stress you are having is not good. Like nancy said take time for yourself. Ace will be fine for now. Hugs and support. When I'm super stressed I try some deep breathing to try and calm down and get a clear head. Take a moment for you!
  13. Calamity Jane

    Calamity Jane Well-Known Member

    That is not a whine. It seems like you're going through a season of life's poop just piling up on you. Sometimes those seasons are short, and sometimes long. We're all here for you, as you are for us. Caring hugs to you. Try to get some rest.
  14. barneysmom

    barneysmom Member


    Good you posted.


    P.S. Vulnerability is very frightening for me too.
  15. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Hugs and much support back to you, Lord knows you give so much to all of us.
    I've not faced your situations but I've felt that trapped and overwhelmed feeling. Picking one thing for myself, for me it needs to be out of the house. Even a ten minute walk ....or a drive to a library or store or volunteer somewhere. I understand not being able just to eliminate the stress. But doing one thing....just for you. That you can probably do. (Easier said than done, I know.)
  16. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Honey you arent whining. I whine. You really need to make some plans for Ace. Do you think easy child/difficult child can take him? Does he have a fenced in yard? If not, is there a good dog park near by that he could take him once a day? I sure wish you could talk to your daughter in Tx again about taking him again.
  17. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I am sorry life is so rough right now. As you know, this too shall pass. Meantime, focus on yourself for a bit. Just think about something you would enjoy and do it. You are the only one that knows what you need, so announce it and make it happen. Hugs!
  18. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I agree, that is not a whine. You are under a lot of stress and good grief, having an 80-yr-old husband who is back to drinking makes it all worse.
    I'm so sorry.
    You are, indeed, a huge support and source or wisdom here on the board. Many, many hugs. I hope you can soak in a soothing bath today. Lock the door and read a book.
  19. muttmeister

    muttmeister Well-Known Member

    Sending hugs your way. I don't think anybody here sees this as whining. I've been in a rough patch myself lately and coming here and venting is one of the things that saves my sanity because I know people here, much more than most people in general, understand the kinds of problems we have. We are here to lend an ear, offer hugs and support, and cuss with you when you need it.
    Hang in there; better days will come.
  20. cubsgirl

    cubsgirl Well-Known Member

    Definitely not a whine. Huge supportive ((hugs))