I have a 17 year old who suffers with depression, anxiety, and ADD. She has been in therapy off and on since she was very young, 3-4 years old. As a small child, she suffered with selective mutism, enursis, encopresis, chewing on her tongue, pulling out her hair, night terrors; you name an anxiety symptom and she seemed to suffer with it. She started on generic Zoloft when she was 12 and it was like I had a new normal kid. She would hug us; she stopped making lists (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) symptom); she could sleep alone in her room; most of her symptoms began subside.
Midway through her junior year, she began to regress. We changed the medicine. I got her into therapy, but nothing worked. So here we are almost at the end of her senior year and I am not sure how much more I can take. She has been in therapy with a new doctor, since October, who seems to understand her issues. We have just changed medication to generic Wellbutrin, but she is going to be 18 in a few months and I, my husband, and the psychologist, do not believe that she is ready for college.
She makes the worst decisions. She doesn’t turn in her school work. She has been skipping classes since t he first of the school year. She just got back her car today, because she skipped school and lied about it and didn’t tell me where she was (our biggest rule to our kids having their own transportation), and she skipped again this morning. Her logic is “it wasn’t going to last anyway, so I might as well have fun.” WHAT!? She has GPS on her phone. She knows I can find out where she is. Why would you do this knowing you will get caught. Twice when caught and punished, she has cut herself. So, of course, I’m terrified it will escalate. Everything is my fault, something the doctor is working on with her. She doesn’t take any responsibility for her actions or choices. I think she says some of these irrational things as a defense or to lash out at me. She refuses to think past this moment.
She’s not a bad kid. She has good friends. She’s not into drugs or alcohol. She follows curfew. But her logic is off the wall weird. I don’t understand her thinking and I don’t know how to help her see that she is only hurting herself, in so many ways. She wants to find a job, and I think it would help her to experience the real world, but she is paralyzed by her anxiety. She only applies on-line and has been contacted twice but she won’t call back and set up the interview. She is terrified of calling people. She spends all her home-time in her room. I think she’d be happy if she never had to leave it.
We are not dealing with little kid problems and I don’t know where to turn or how to deal with this irrational behavior. I know this seems minor compared to some of the problems others on this site have posted, but I have been battling this child for 17 years (literally) and it feels like I am failing miserably. Has anyone had similar issues and what helped?
Midway through her junior year, she began to regress. We changed the medicine. I got her into therapy, but nothing worked. So here we are almost at the end of her senior year and I am not sure how much more I can take. She has been in therapy with a new doctor, since October, who seems to understand her issues. We have just changed medication to generic Wellbutrin, but she is going to be 18 in a few months and I, my husband, and the psychologist, do not believe that she is ready for college.
She makes the worst decisions. She doesn’t turn in her school work. She has been skipping classes since t he first of the school year. She just got back her car today, because she skipped school and lied about it and didn’t tell me where she was (our biggest rule to our kids having their own transportation), and she skipped again this morning. Her logic is “it wasn’t going to last anyway, so I might as well have fun.” WHAT!? She has GPS on her phone. She knows I can find out where she is. Why would you do this knowing you will get caught. Twice when caught and punished, she has cut herself. So, of course, I’m terrified it will escalate. Everything is my fault, something the doctor is working on with her. She doesn’t take any responsibility for her actions or choices. I think she says some of these irrational things as a defense or to lash out at me. She refuses to think past this moment.
She’s not a bad kid. She has good friends. She’s not into drugs or alcohol. She follows curfew. But her logic is off the wall weird. I don’t understand her thinking and I don’t know how to help her see that she is only hurting herself, in so many ways. She wants to find a job, and I think it would help her to experience the real world, but she is paralyzed by her anxiety. She only applies on-line and has been contacted twice but she won’t call back and set up the interview. She is terrified of calling people. She spends all her home-time in her room. I think she’d be happy if she never had to leave it.
We are not dealing with little kid problems and I don’t know where to turn or how to deal with this irrational behavior. I know this seems minor compared to some of the problems others on this site have posted, but I have been battling this child for 17 years (literally) and it feels like I am failing miserably. Has anyone had similar issues and what helped?