I had a temper tantrum.....

[Debdeb1031]

Bob and i have been really depressed about life in general these past few days/(weeks?)....Bills and little moments with chris have taken a toll on our relationship as well as our family....anyways this morning Bob and I were talking and Chris came into the room...I asked him to leave because we were talking....he wouldn't...i asked him over and over and he wouldn't get his butt out of the room....now granted it doesn't sound so horrific but add that to feeling so sad and down..i lost it....i yelled at him to get out of the room he yelled back no, so i went over to him and tried to drag him out as he is yelling screaming and kicking...i finally grabbed his ear and pulled him out and locked the door....i know it doesn't sound so bad, but with work and problems with bob, the stress made me break...i sat on my bed and just cried and cried...chris' ba came and they all went to the park, so now i can beat out my frustrations on my pile of laundry...chris has been doing really well..its just that now i'm at the point where even a little bit of defiance is just as bad as a meltdown...anyone else go thru that as well???? where you see good behavior that every little bad behavior is just so traumatic??? <sigh> even chain smoking isn't helping matters...i'm so depressed about all in general...thanks for letting me vent...i know you all have full plates of your own...

 

[Martie]

Everyone of us has yelled when we didn't mean to. We recover, and the difficult child recovers if it doesn't happen too often.

You sound very depressed and overwhelmed. I think the first thing you should do is seek support for yourself. "If the mom is not OK, no one is OK."

You do not mention medications for yourself--that's OK, not everyone is comfortable with that. However, if you are not on medications, perhaps you should talk with someone qualified to help you. medications for many moms put a "floor" under the terrific stresses we face.

I hope you get some relief, because you need a break.

{HUGS}

Martie

 

[TerryJ2]

been there done that, Deb. So sorry.
It's the history of the thing, in addition to being at your wits end.
Hang on.

 

[Jessica mom of 2]

Its ok! We all break at one point sometimes. You could talk with Chris later after you have calmed down and tell him that you are sorry for hollering at him. BUT at the same time, you ask him to leave and that him telling you NO, is an inappropriate answer. You could explain to him that you and your husband needed to discuss something and you needed for him to leave. I know all of this sounds so much easier said than done, I wish I could use my own advice when I have times like you have had today. I am so sorry and hope that you and Bob and Chris are able to work things out!

As far as you being frustrated for the last few weeks, i would say, you could use some time for yourself for sure! Don't beat yourself up because it is completely normal for us to loose it sometimes, we are human!

Keep us posted!
Jessica

 

[Debdeb1031]

Thanks all....i feel much much better...i did apologize to Chris, but i tried to make it like I was showing him how he acts with us..lol...little white lies couldn't hurt...he is much better socially and mostly at home, but like i said it's the little things that become huge...like when i say no to one of his requests...he calls me names and it hurts...now i just ignore him...bob and i managed to snuggle on the couch a little while in peace while the kids were out playing..nothing like a few i love yous to make a soul feel better...thanks for the words of kindness and encouragement...i never really flipped like that...

 

[susiestar]

Oh I am glad you had a snuggle with your sweetie, that is such a good thing.

We all lose it sometimes. Even parents of children without these problems lose it. It is just hard to keep in mind that we warrior moms are human.

And yes, sometimes, all it takes is the constant interruptions and chattering to drive you batty.

Try to find time to do something you enjoy, truly enjoy. Recharging is so important for moms.

Hugs,

Susie