Run to the nearest store and pick up the book boundaries. I am middle of moving or I could tell you exactly who the authors are I believe it is Townsend and cloud but I am not For sure. By the time you get to the forth chapter which is almost identical circumstances you will understand how much this book can help. This book was given to me by a therapist and it changed my life.I don't even no were to start. I have 4 kids ages 30 28 26 25. All live at home amd only one has not caused me any problems. My 2 sons are alcoholic and when drinking they become out of control .someone is going to get hurt and killed. I want to kick them out but I'm afraid because my brother killed him self at a young age due to depression and I'm sure my kids suffer from this as well.