It's that time of year again...

[tiredmommy]

I think it creeps up on us every year. Mother's Day is less than 2 weeks away. How are you doing this year? Some of us are in very bad places, some in new territory, some filled with hope and others are trudging along. I'd like this thread to be about the inspiration that keeps us moving along with our difficult children, that love and bond we feel for them. I was thinking earlier today that the ultimate Mother's Day gift for me would be to know that Duckie will be okay in the future. Or at least functioning. How about you? What do you want for Mother's Day (even if you won't get it). Any words of inspiration to the weary?

 

[flutterbee]

I hadn't realized it was so close.

I remember when easy child acted like a big brother to difficult child and how protective he was of her. Now they can hardly have a civilized conversation. My relationship with my brother has always been tumultuous and it's always weighed heavy on my heart.

For Mother's Day, I wish for my children to rebuild their bond and start building a relationship.

 

[tiredmommy]

Heather, that would be a beautiful gift. I remember, clearly, my father talking to both my brother & I over the years. He would remind us that, in many ways, our shared childhoods gave us more in common with each other than any one else in the world. It took awhile to sink in, but it did eventually.

 

[tiredmommy]

Nomad,
How wonderful that you are thinking of your friend! You may want to work with your friend to come up with a few new traditions this year since you both have lost your mothers. Maybe brunch, a nature hike, spending time reading to residents of a nursing home. Anything to show honor for your mothers.

 

[donna723]

My son thought it was THIS Sunday and was already making his plans! I have no idea what he will come up with, but since they've gotten older, the presents are nicer! And more thoughtful!
:thumb:
For Mothers Day, I would like to get a phone call from my daughter telling me that I'm going to be a grandmother! They've been trying for a year and a half, but nothing yet. Still waiting for that phone call! :wink:

 

[tiredmommy]

Donna,
Don't they teach boys to read calendars in school? Lol! :hammer: I'm looking forward to being a grandma too. Just way, WAY in the future, lol! :smile: Duckie and I have already talked for awhile about her being grown up, not marrying until after college and how I'll take the kids one evening a week so she and future sister in law can have an evening to themselves. She always tells me to be good & firm with the kids, I always say that her job. I'm grandma! :rofl:

 

[timer lady]

TM,

It will be a bittersweet Mother's Day this year. The tweedles are both out of treatment facilities this year - the first Mother's Day in 3 years that we can all be together as a family.

kt & wm have made baby steps - I'll take them.

My first Mother's day with-o my mom this year. In honor of Mom, I plan on planting a tree in my yard.

 

[tiredmommy]

Linda,
I'm glad the family can be together for you. You deserve it. I'm also glad that you have come up with a tribute to your Mom that you can enjoy for many years to come. It'll bring you comfort.
Here's a quote for you:
A man has made at least a start on discovering the meaning of human life when he plants shade trees under which he knows full well he will never sit.
- D. Elton Trueblood

 

[Just keep swimming]

My perfect Mother's day would be to hear from pediatrician that Jayme's echo was totally normal, that Aly's Scoliosis test was normal and that my 2 older kids were coming for a surprise visit(minus future grandson, still not over last weekend yet!!LOL)

The other part of my day would be a total difficult child-behavior free day!!!

Great topic!!

Hugs,
Vickie

 

[tiredmommy]

Vickie,
That's too funny about future grandson, but I understand. I feel that way about my youngest great niece. I'm happy to see her come, and happy to see her go. :wink:
Prayers being said that the girls' tests come back completely normal. :angel:

 

[totoro]

Mother's day is weird for me, since my mother commited suicide when I was 9yo, I have been alone and didn't think about it much... then came difficult child 1. I fell in love with being a Mom. Then it became so hard. I love her and try to find the calm and peace every Mother's Day, 3 years ago on Mother's Day I was giving birth to little Nina... who I named after my Mom. I gave her a Spanish name like my Mom and the same middle name. So with my little one being newly diagnosis'd it is very bittersweet, with Mother's Day coming, she starts Occupational Therapist (OT) next week...

It makes me think a lot of our future and my girls future.... But I am quickly pulled back to reality when they look me in the eye pleading help me Mommy, needing me to pull them out of their nightmare... I am their Mom. They need me. It all makes sense then.

 

[Kjs]

My mothers day wish would be to see that sparkle in my boys' eyes. Been a rough year.

 

[tiredmommy]

Totoro,
It's good that you are strong. Your girls need you. I'm glad that you are able to look past the loss of your mother and still find joy in what you are doing.
Kjs,
It hurts to look at our children when they are feeling defeated. I, too, hope that the sparkle returns soon. Happy & healthy is what it's all about.

 

[hearts and roses]

We're having Mother's Day this Sunday since easy child will be home for the weekend. I think we're doing brunch on Sunday morning before I drive her back to school.

Next Sunday, I will be in my gardens planting and sowing and mulching. No special plans.

It was hard, but I had to let go of my 'ideal' Mother's Day but once I did let go, I found that they got better and better. Some years difficult child doesn't acknowledge the day at all except for a perfuntory kiss and wish me a nice day. easy child always makes Mother's Day special - she writes me a lovely card and nudges H to take us all out for breakfast or dinner.

I think the key to having a nice Mother's Day is to not have high expectations of what it's "supposed" to be like and go with it.

My wish is for a peaceful day spent in my gardens.

 

[tiredmommy]

Jo,
It sounds like you have healthy expectations for the holiday. Enjoy your garden. :smile:

 

[amstrong]

Mother's Day weekend will be special for us. My Mom will be here. Saturday, we are doing a cookout to celebrate difficult child earning his diploma with me, husband, difficult child, my Mom, husband's Mom, difficult child's best friend, best friend's parents and an old friend of my Mom's and her husband (they have been part of my family since I was a baby). Sunday, husband and I are cooking breakfast for our Moms to consist of Tomato/Bacon Pie, bacon, fresh fruit and coffee.

difficult child mentioned to me last nite that his cookout weekend was Mother's Day too so maybe I will get a card-if not, it will be great just having him at home and all of us living in peace and harmony.

Hope every one of you have a great Mother's Day!

 

[totoro]

Thanks TM for starting this thread... You are what a lot of Mom's should be... Thoughtful... Kind...

 

[tiredmommy]

Robyn,
Your weekend sounds wonderful. I can't think of a better mother's day for you than knowing your difficult child will be a high school graduate. I think it helps us validate our struggles when a goal has been attained.
Totoro,
We are all works in progress, growing every day. I am often humbled by the sheer strength and devotion I witness daily among our members. It helps me to do better because I know I'm not alone.

 

[totoro]

TM- I agree I must say the parents here make me want to be a better parent!!!

 

[amstrong]

TM,

It is so gratifying to see difficult child achieve this goal. I agree wholeheartedly about the other parents on this board. If not for all of you guys, I would have snatched myself bald years ago.
This board rocks!