Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by doubletroublesma, Jan 21, 2008.

  1. doubletroublesma

    doubletroublesma New Member

    OHHH is he peeved! *Our rule is two warnings then a consequence. He was told if helped his sister clear the dinner table he could have 15 minutes of computer time. At warning 3 he was told he lost computer time tonite. Now the meltdown begins.

    He is standing here crying and screaming, *so he was given the choice of either stop the crying or go to his room until he was over it. He has stopped and moved onto something else.

    Not bad, first meltdown in two days, they were several every day.

    *Based on the advice of the doctor, if anyone has suggestions I am totally open.
  2. PersonalEnigma

    PersonalEnigma New Member

    We often send difficult child to his room to finish his meltdown. I don't want to punish him for the behaviour he can't control, but I don't want to have to watch/listen to it. Sometimes he chooses to stop, sometimes he goes to his room. Whatever thing he had to do before the meltdown started remains there for him to do once the meltdown is over. For example if he had a meltdown because he didn't want to tidy his things he would be alowed to get the meltdown out of his system, but when he was done he would be expected to finish tidying his things. I also require him to clean up any mess he makes while in a meltdown but don't punish him for it.
  3. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    :bravo:to difficult child for stopping his meltdown & making good choices. That's impressive for such a young one.

    All I can recommend is to continue doing what you are doing & doing it consistently if you're doing if it works. Through the journey of GFGdom we many times must change tactics, but I use the ones that work as long as I can get away with it.

    Good job, :warrior: mum.
  4. daralex

    daralex Clinging onto my sanity

    I'm just starting to learn what works and what doesn't and am still open to suggestions. It seems for us that having strict guidelines as to what will happen if difficult child enters meltdown phase is helpful (just like the warning rules you've set in place). I learned yesterday first hand that keeping your voice calm while doing it seems to help tremendously in keeping them calmer too. I am not an expert by any means but consistency seems to be the key - You sound like you're getting a great handle on this and aren't we all so lucky that we'll have plenty of practice with it!!!
    - Dara
  5. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    I think you handled this just perfectly. Warnings, concrete consequences, and then a choice about his meltdown. Sounds like what you're doing is working too - anything that stops a meltdown is great in my book. ;)

    Yeah, difficult child!!
  6. tdtt

    tdtt tdtt

    This is what worked well for my two boys. They have a meltdown- they immediately go to their rooms until done. When all is calm again- they can rejoin the family.

    I may be strict but I don't offer them choices when they are in a rage- they just go to their rms. They would tear them apart- they would stay that way. Both boys would go to their rms ( under their own steam) as carrying or dragging was out of the question as that fed their need to control me. They needed to learn to control themselves & calm down - no matter how long it took. I was always there to check on them if necessary.