Hi all, I came across this site today looking for some answers for my troubled son. Your stories as many others hit home. Here is my story... I too have a son who is 21 years old that we have been struggling to help for several years. I also have a daughter with Cerebral Palsey(20) and another daughter(19) that is in her Freshman year of College. He has always had a self-esteem issue due to his height, lack of social skills and eventually acne in high school. He has always been a kind, bright handsome young man, but his personality has changed drastically over the last several years. Started working at 14 and worked 30 plus hours making good money in high school. Not exactly sure when he started smoking weed but I'm thinking around 15/16. When we found out we sent him to a counselor and honestly didn't know how to handle it. We were shocked and didn't probably react well, we were so naïve and unprepared for something like this. His pot smoking progressed and he has become a master manipulator. Graduated early December '16, and moved out saying he wanted to go to college. We signed him up for college and paid for both classes and apartment hoping things had changed as he made us believe. 3 months later he fesses up that he hadn't attended a single class so we cut him off. He worked for awhile, but eventually ended back at home. This is when we really noticed a change in his personality. He talks very strange and calls it his personal development. Watches odd videos on a website called actualized.org that promote psychedelics and moving away from normal society beliefs. After a short time I realized that he had also been experimenting with acid and Xanax. After a few months we sent him to rehab for a month. 2 weeks after being home he was back hanging with his "friends' doing the same crap. My husband finally had enough of the lies and bs after a few months and kicked him out. That lasted 6 months before he lost his job and had no means to support himself. This after being arrested for possession of a controlled substance(Xanax) October 2017.We hired an attorney and he got a deferred judgement. 2 months later Feb 2018 he was arrested again for DUI and possession. We got him a lawyer if he agreed to go to a dual diagnosis facility for mental health and substance abuse. He came home this May(18), on various medications for depression and eventually started seeing a therapist. He has no "real" friends that I know of and has such social anxiety that it's hard for him to meet new people, and has never had a girlfriend to my knowledge. In July he violated his probation and got arrested for public intox. We again hired him an attorney and were waiting to see if he would lose his deferred judgements. He Started working full time in August and I really thought things were going to get better. We had gotten his acne under control and I thought I was seeing progress with his self-esteem. My mistake was having hope. He just recently got his license back He has in the last month stopped taking his antidepressants, started drinking heavily again, staying out late and this week supposedly started smoking pot again. He is on probation with 2 deferred judgements he is at risk of losing next week and he decided to text to inform his PO that he smoked pot last week. He has court this coming Thursday, saying prayers but thinking maybe he needs to face the consequences as much as it kills me. He is so bright, and has so much potential. This has been exhausting and financially draining several years. I don't have many friends anymore, this has completely consumed my life and the life of our family. I hope my story helps others and would love any advice. So heartbroken.