My adult daughter stole from.

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by zilla, Mar 18, 2013.

  1. zilla

    zilla New Member

    Hi, I had a breakdown last year and my daughter talked me into putting my money into her account, I was confused and a bit helpless at the time (I had been attacked by 2 guard dogs at work, which left me disabled in my right arm and leg), now Im feeling a little better but she wont give me my money back, Im worried sick as it was quite a large ammount, my roof is leaking and needs to be fixed asap.....I dont know what to do, Ive phoned her, emailed her, she will not listen to me, in fact she turns her phone off, Im at my wits end, anybody any idea what I can do please!!!!! :'(
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    You may want to post in parent emeritus too as those are all parents of adult kids who are big problems. I happen to have a few adult kids. My advice right off is to get a lawyer right away. Don't waste another minute. If you feel she is abusing you or trying to isolate you because of your money and you can't afford a lawyer, call your local Dept. of Aging and Disabilities (even if you're not that old) and ask them what to do. They are good advocates. Do you have any other kids who will help you? Relatives? This is serious. You need to not be afraid of her. If all else fails call the police and see what THEY suggest. You didn't sign it over to her permanantly, did you? Is she your legal (court approved) guardian? it not, she has no rights to your money, but you need help physically doing the legwork to get it back. Any close friends who are pretty bold and would help you? Gosh, I feel terrible and I hate situations like this. If I lived near you, I'd be on MY phone finding out EXACTLY what you can do. I'm one of those people who refuses not to try and refuses to give up...but that doesn't help you...

    The first thing I'd do, if you have access to ANYONE's phone is call a lawyer. If she shuts down the phone, ask a neighbor if you can use hers. I can tell you, most people hearing the story would say "of course!" DO NOT BOTHER TRYING TO REASON WITH HER!!! Get legal.
  3. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    This is awful! Im so sorry. I dont know where you live or any back story to this but I am going to assume some things since I would assume you dont have a husband or live in partner or you would have put your money in their account.

    Its also pretty obvious your daughter doesnt live with you. Do you have any other kids? Does your daughter even live in the same town with you? Are you better from your injuries now? I am hoping so.

    The very first thing I want you to do if you dont have any documentation showing that you put your money in her account is to send her an email saying something to the effect of " (Daughters name), I have been trying to contact you about the money in the amount of XXXX that you allowed me to deposit into your bank account at XXX bank on YYY date. I need to get it out and start a bank account in my name now. Would you please call me about this matter as soon as possible. Thanks a lot...Mom"

    That gives you documentation that you did just such a thing even if she doesnt respond.

    You should have some sort of paper trail of where you got your money to put in her account and that is where you can start to show its your money and not hers. She would have to show how she got that substantial amount of money since you said it was a substantial amount and not just a paycheck.
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    I agree, your bank statements should match her deposits so if this goes to a legal process it will show what happened.

    I pray she still has the money. This situation makes makes me sick for you, I'm very sorry.