I almost posted this in Watercooler, but so much has to do with difficult child and 504, I thought I'd get more input here on those two. Skip the next 3 paragraphs if you want to get to the difficult child and 504 part. Well, husband took the day off today because easy child-D went to preschool this morning for her first day back. It was our first day of no kids and we wanted to just hang out. What that really means is, we had tons of errands to run. First we went to like 5 stores trying to find folders with brads and pockets. I still don't get why middle school doesn't post school supply lists BEFORE school starts. Then we went to the police station for finger printing! Yes, I'm now part of the FBI database. LOL No, it was for us to start moving forward with the adoption. Gotta have my background check done. I was afraid to do this earlier because I didn't want to JINX our case. I know, stupid, but I just didn't want to get too far ahead of ourselves. So then we took the fingerprinting cards to the attorneys office. Dropped those off and headed home. Tuesday I got a call from my mom asking for advice with custody issues. A woman in her office had her son over for the weekend and he broke down in tears and told his mom that his bio dad has been beating him. My advice was to call CPS. They will typically get the kid out of there faster than a judge, unfortunately. So they did that and the kid was removed and placed with his mom. So, back to today, mom called again asking if I had clothes that may fit the boy. I have 5 boys and 2 friends just gave me a bunch of clothes, so I found winter stuff, but no summer stuff. Poor kid, all this change, new school started today and no clothes to wear. I told my mom I'd run to the thrift store if she wanted, but shes going to take her friend there tomorrow and buy some clothes. Okay, so after all of my running, we had our 504 meeting for youngest difficult child. I was really hoping this new school would be better, but I swear the new teacher seemed miffed in the meeting. Maybe its just me. I told husband I thought she seemed annoyed with us. When the cupcake incident was brought up and the cookie incident, I let her know that difficult child sneaks at home too so I understand, but still the hairy eyeball. Maybe she was just trying to stand her ground on what she thought was best. I don't know. We are so flexible and I try to make teachers feel like I support them, but I don't want the hairy eyeball nor did I deserve it. The old school said they would heat up difficult children lunch for him because he would eat leftovers and they aren't always tasty cold. The new school said no way to this. The old school said toy treats were okay for birthday celebrations because difficult child can't eat cupcakes/cookies and the new school wants food treats. I said okay to these things because I'm trying to work with them, but then they won't let him have his afternoon snack because other kids aren't eating one. I have to bring a doctors note ordering it. I told the teacher this was for her benefit, that if he gets hungry, he has trouble focussing and behaving, but she still says no. I can't get this teacher to reply to my emails the night of, so I can't ask about difficult children specific behavioral problems. They have a chart that has a T for Talking, O for Off Task and D for Disrespect. This chart probably works great for other kids, but if they want me to help out and support them, I can't get onto difficult child for talking, off task or disrespect without getting more info. I have to spell out what actions were wrong and what actions he should have done. That paragraph was getting too long, so heres a new one. LOL Anyways, teacher says difficult child is refusing to put any effort forward on anything. He'll answer the easy stuff, but if he has to read to figure it out, he refuses to answer. He had a sheet of spelling words, 20, that he had to write and he only wrote 6. Not because he doesn't know the answer but because he just doesn't want to do it. I told the teacher that medications will help some of this, but I still got the hairy eyeball. I'm not sure what to do. She seemed nice in her last email, but in person she seems a tad annoyed with us. I'm sure she thinks he just needs more discipline, which is what MOST people think. HECK I use to think this, but geez! Those that know us know we are more structured than any house around and we don't let our kids slide. I'm at a loss as to what to do to make this year go better than it seems to have started out as. I offered to come and shadow him next week, they want him to learn to do things on his own. Umm, hello, he won't. I wish I could explain this to people when they first meet him, but they of course have to figure this out for themselves. If this school decides he is too much to deal with they can send him back to his home school which means we get to deal with the Evil Principal again. UUUGH! I offered the lanyard idea, they said no. Oh, but they did take me up on one thing. difficult child isn't finishing classwork and I told the teacher if he doesn't finish she can send it home and husband and I will do it with him. Of course that idea was good enough to accept. I'm just at a loss. I'm not sure what the heck to do here. If I cause too much trouble we could be back at the old school in a heartbeat. This school does not have to take us, we are transfers. So enough of my babbling...any ideas on what I should do now?