I kicked my son out Monday. Because I had insisted he arrange to enter into treatment. I gave him 10 days. He has coverage under my insurance. I did not specify residential treatment. I said any treatment: NA, AA, personal therapist, County Mental Health, inpatient, whatever. But you cannot stay here without getting some kind of treatment. He spent the week reaching out to several options and smoking lots and lots of dope. By the end of the interval, we kicked him out. He left with his sleeping bag and there it was. We wondered about him and worried about him. M said he had called yesterday from a number in the big city. Today he told me he had called from what M thought was a hospital. I called the number, and it was a regional medical center with a psychiatric unit. Nobody would put me through. The contact from the residential treatment center that my son thought was the best bet, called today too, and said that all barriers to his admission had been removed by the insurance company. That he could enter. Unfortunately, M said, he is not here. He went to the big city and I do not know how to reach him. I am grateful my son is safe and while I can see it showed good judgment (in a sense) to gain admission to a psychiatric hospital, (he probably had no money to eat), it peeves me that he lives this way. I am hoping that he will indeed go to the residential treatment center, but, we are at the end of the month--his SSI check arrives. Probably tomorrow. With money in his pocket who knows what he will do. I know my son does not want to live on the street. And as far as I know there are no doors open to him--by friends. Will he again be satisfied to live near the street--ripped off, to get a couch to sleep on, and no security that he will not be thrown out, half his check gone and nowhere to live? Hopefully the stability we gave him, gives him the moment to think about whether or not he wants to go back to something so marginal. But I am without any control here. I do know that. I just hope my son makes the right choice. He could no more live here. He was regressing. There had been a lot of growth on his part, but it had stopped. The dope. The lying. The busting the wall. He was trying to dominate again. Whether or not he was engineering things for this to come to an end or not, I do not know. But we had no choice. Now he does. I hope he does right for himself. Pray with me. Please. Thank you.