Hello all. I am a new member here and and grateful for the wise words and experience I have browsed the last few hours. I am a stepmother-although we never used that term I was just Mom to a 35 year old woman. I have parented her since she was 5. She had suffered abuse before coming to live with me and it has always been a rocky relationship. Recently I paid for her to go through counseling and she was diagniosed with borderline personality, bipolar and mood disorder, She is getting worse not better and today was the final line for me. It has been a hard road with her but I stuck it out for her children. Just as the two were getting older 13 and 15 she had another. He turns 5 this weekend. She has always used him as a pawn and has done so again today. Nothing we do is ever ever enough. You can't love her enough, you can't give her enough. Her youngest brothers wedding is coming up and she has distracted all attention from that to herself, yet again. I know I have enabled her in the past and I went to counseling and then encouraged her to go last year. Of course I learned a lot and she saw no benefit, the counselor wasn't helping, didn't know what she was talking about (she is well known and has many published books) the counselor referred her on to another Dr. to help her with her moods disorder medication and I cannot get her to go. She probably would if I paid for it but I have just had to stop. She has been a drain emotionally and financially for years. She just totaled my car two weeks ago, she takes advantage of everyone and the only reason we have stayed the passed 5 years is because of the baby boy who we have cared for and picked up almost every day since his birth. We are hurting because he is like our own child. The older two children no longer live with her because of her severe mood swings and verbal abuse yet she can still sway them and cause chaos. We paid for all 4 of them to go to the wedding in September. Now she has successfully ruined that by lying to the older two children. Non refundable tickets 1200 dollars down the drain. Her brother for the first time in his life told her to not ever contact him again. What started all of this is waking up to a facebook post by her saying she had no family and we never loved her and glad she found out our true colors, and then de friended us as we were asking what in the world is wrong. So, I think we are all worn out with her. I would love to see the little one but only if I don't have to deal with her. I am sure she has already lied to him today, how cruel, and I am trying not to think about it. She tried to commit suicide a couple months ago and was able to talk herself out of the hospital after about 24 hours. She was so angry that I called 911 but you threaten that is what you get. Then she admitted to me a few days later that she had in fact attempted and thought she would be ok now. To get her oldest son that was supposed to be in the wedding not to go she told him that his grandfather had done things as in molested!!!! the youngest one. I know this isn't true and my husband is totally devastated. We know we cannot go back now. She is no longer a part of our family. Her oldest brother has had I will no longer claim her. How do you move on. How?