jaycee
New Member
Hi everyone,
I just found this site last night and am so relieved that I did! Just reading through some of your posts makes me realize I am far from alone in what I'm dealing with right now, and just knowing that helps.
My son is 16 years old, and the last two years have been a nightmare.
In that time, he has become addicted to marijuana (which, of course, he thinks is no big deal -- "everyone smokes it, mom."), his emotional reactions were so out of the norm that he has gone through two counselors and a psychiatrist, is diagnosed with bipolar and mood disorder for which he is currently taking Geodon (after claiming Abilify and then risperdal didn't help -- I am suspecting he's hoping to get a different drug that will get him high, honestly...).
He has a history over these two years of flying into uncontrollable rages (I have at least 5 holes in our walls, broken lamps/mirrors/etc), and threatens suicide as well as becoming self-destructive during the rages by hitting himself in the head or attempting to open car doors as we drive, for example.
Before he started doing drugs, he was a decent student and a talented athlete in three different sports. As of right now, he is involved in no sports at all and we are working on a plan with the school to support him academically. He lost out on a varsity sport due to grades, then got back on his team and was kicked off within two weeks after the police pulled him over and caught him with weed (a civil violation in our state). I spent an hour in the police station with him while they pressured him for information about his dealer.
Text messages I've found make it clear that as recently as a couple of months ago, he was dealing drugs. He was accused of that at school last year, denied it, swore he'd straighten out, etc., but nothing worked, apparently. I've found things in his room (bongs, pipes, lighters, small amounds of weed), and last week discovered that he has been pulling apart the inhalers we give him for his asthma and turning them into pipes. He doesn't see why that's sick.
I think he does other drugs. He has admitted to "trying" ecstacy and Adderol, but swears he doesnt' do anything but weed. But he is an accomplished liar at this point, and I am scared he's taking more serious stuff. There have been a couple times he's come home way more out of it than I know marijuana would make him...
We had put a car on the road for him before Christmas, after a period of no obvious incidents, but that was a huge mistake, of course. It's now in the garage, and he knows he won't be driving it again unless he gets clean and pulls his life together. If ever.
He is defiant to the point that we cannot control him. He cannot be grounded, because he either destroys the house or runs away. There isn't much left to take away from him -- most of his electronics are gone (sold for drugs, I am sure), and the cell phone is all that's left.
Sorry to ramble here...there's even more I can tell you, but you get the idea.
At this point, I know he will either be in jail soon, or needs to go to a rehab.
He is totally uncooperative -- threatens suicide/becomes destructive when I mention getting him help by sending him to a rehab or therapeutic school, won't submit to drug testing, goes out with all of his druggie friends no matter how much we object...
I guess right now, I'm wondering if any of you who've been through something similar can give me any advice on getting that level of help for a kid who is so resistant to it.
I have a 10 year old daughter who has been traumatized by her brother's outbursts and behavior, too.
Thank you for listening. It's good just to get it out, you know?
I just found this site last night and am so relieved that I did! Just reading through some of your posts makes me realize I am far from alone in what I'm dealing with right now, and just knowing that helps.
My son is 16 years old, and the last two years have been a nightmare.
In that time, he has become addicted to marijuana (which, of course, he thinks is no big deal -- "everyone smokes it, mom."), his emotional reactions were so out of the norm that he has gone through two counselors and a psychiatrist, is diagnosed with bipolar and mood disorder for which he is currently taking Geodon (after claiming Abilify and then risperdal didn't help -- I am suspecting he's hoping to get a different drug that will get him high, honestly...).
He has a history over these two years of flying into uncontrollable rages (I have at least 5 holes in our walls, broken lamps/mirrors/etc), and threatens suicide as well as becoming self-destructive during the rages by hitting himself in the head or attempting to open car doors as we drive, for example.
Before he started doing drugs, he was a decent student and a talented athlete in three different sports. As of right now, he is involved in no sports at all and we are working on a plan with the school to support him academically. He lost out on a varsity sport due to grades, then got back on his team and was kicked off within two weeks after the police pulled him over and caught him with weed (a civil violation in our state). I spent an hour in the police station with him while they pressured him for information about his dealer.
Text messages I've found make it clear that as recently as a couple of months ago, he was dealing drugs. He was accused of that at school last year, denied it, swore he'd straighten out, etc., but nothing worked, apparently. I've found things in his room (bongs, pipes, lighters, small amounds of weed), and last week discovered that he has been pulling apart the inhalers we give him for his asthma and turning them into pipes. He doesn't see why that's sick.
I think he does other drugs. He has admitted to "trying" ecstacy and Adderol, but swears he doesnt' do anything but weed. But he is an accomplished liar at this point, and I am scared he's taking more serious stuff. There have been a couple times he's come home way more out of it than I know marijuana would make him...
We had put a car on the road for him before Christmas, after a period of no obvious incidents, but that was a huge mistake, of course. It's now in the garage, and he knows he won't be driving it again unless he gets clean and pulls his life together. If ever.
He is defiant to the point that we cannot control him. He cannot be grounded, because he either destroys the house or runs away. There isn't much left to take away from him -- most of his electronics are gone (sold for drugs, I am sure), and the cell phone is all that's left.
Sorry to ramble here...there's even more I can tell you, but you get the idea.
At this point, I know he will either be in jail soon, or needs to go to a rehab.
He is totally uncooperative -- threatens suicide/becomes destructive when I mention getting him help by sending him to a rehab or therapeutic school, won't submit to drug testing, goes out with all of his druggie friends no matter how much we object...
I guess right now, I'm wondering if any of you who've been through something similar can give me any advice on getting that level of help for a kid who is so resistant to it.
I have a 10 year old daughter who has been traumatized by her brother's outbursts and behavior, too.
Thank you for listening. It's good just to get it out, you know?