Hello everybody...I'm new to the site. I have been reading alot of posts on here and I think alot of ppl here seem to be in a somewhat similar situation to what I'm in. I have three children, 2 boys and a girl. My boys are 9 and 8 and my girl is 21 months. My 9 year old has been giving me problems for years and I keep trying to help him and talk to him to make him understand and he never gets better. It just gets worse and worse and worse. This is going to sound bad, but I'm at the point now where I don't even like him anymore. I love him of course, but most days, I just wish he wasn't even around. He has a complete lack of respect for rules. He does what ever he wants, when he wants and when he gets in trouble he refuses to accept responsiblity for anything he does or he will blame it on his brother. He yells, he argues, he gets mad easily, he's manipulative, he lies constantly. He refuses to ever do his chores without being told. He hardly has anything in his room anymore because he breaks all of his stuff, not out of anger, but just for no reason as far as I can see. Then he gets mad because I wont buy him more stuff or because he doesn't have anything. I refuse to keep trying to make his room look nice and buy him things for him to continuously break them. He still wets the bed every night. And he has talked his brother into having "naked time" with him at least 10 times(that I know of) over the years. I've had problems with my 9 year old ever since I can remember. My 8 year old was always a lot different...quiet,shy,never argues(still doesn't), always does what he is told, but now my oldest is talking him into things and making him do things. My 9 year old will take my 8 year old and beat the **** out of him until he does what he was told by him. It's an endless cycle of trying to enforce good behavior and all I ever get is bad behavior, lies, and arguing. I'm so tired of it. Nothing I do works. I've tried EVERYTHING I can do at home. I'm so scared that the next person to be sucked into his influence is my little girl. Everything is so different when he isn't here. So normal. I took him to a psychologist when he was 7 and he said he had ADHD, ODD, and personality disorder I believe he said, but couldn't diagnose this because he wasn't old enough yet. We did Adderall for about a year and it did help improve his grades, but thats about it. He was also on Risperadol(SP?) and I saw no change from that. The psychologist was horrible. He never even talked to my son. He only talked to me alone and then would bring my son in and just tell him to be good for me and do what I ask. Then my husband got laid off and we lost our insurance and there went the medications. We also cannot get Medicaid because we make too much, but not enough to get insurance. I'm hoping to get insurance soon as my husband is changing jobs again and we should be able to finally afford it. The more I read about behavior and mental disorders, the more I think he has Bipolar Disorder too. I just feel like I'm at a stand still right now. The psychologist we saw before suggested putting him to the behavior center for several weeks. I started to and when we got there, they were bringing in 3 kids who were coming in from jail. It disturbed me because I was thinking,"my son is not that bad", and I didn't want him exposed to those kinds of children. And now I am severely regretting not doing it when I had the chance. I know now that I am just going to have to use tough love and suck it up and do what I have to do even if that means putting him in the behavioral hospital for a few weeks.
I don't guess I really have a particular question. I've dealt with this for so long that all I can do is talk about what is going on and thats it. Sometimes I don't even know what to say because I just don't understand why.
I don't guess I really have a particular question. I've dealt with this for so long that all I can do is talk about what is going on and thats it. Sometimes I don't even know what to say because I just don't understand why.