J. gets VERY upset when things go wrong. She has never been easygoing in any way, even since she quit drugs. Her relationship with G. has gone on for eight years now and it has always been a bit dramatic. I think G. is a little on the abusive side, verbally at least, and J. is not one to pacify him. When he blows up, she responds because that's how she is. We have talked and she is responding less, but it isn't stopping him from his periodic blow ups. When he gets angry, he is not above throwing things or breaking things like a young difficult child. He has also punched a hole in the wall. I have had many talks about this with J., but after the blow ups things would be good for long periods of time, she loves him and does not or DID not want to leave him. She is 27. I can't MAKE her leave him. G. is basically a pretty good looking man, but he's a geek and never dated much. So J. was shocked when she found some cell phone nudies from another girl on his phone last year. They almost broke up over that, but he talked her into giving him another chance. They went on vacation and he got his "another chance." But she never really forgot it and things have been more volatile since then. When he is angry, he calls her horrible names which he cries over and apologies for the next day. Lately, he has been breaking up with her then begging her back. J. is getting tired of him. He did this break up bit again this week and she decided to let it stand, but they own a house together. Both are stubborn. He won't leave and she won't leave. And he also spent half the night after he broke up with her trying to get her to go back to him. She told him he'd have to get help and prove himself, but that she's going to live her own life. There was an understanding that he would do everything in his power to try to keep her in his life. I am not sure what set her off this time because she called me from work and could not talk long, but apparently his crazy sister (yes, s he is truly crazy) told her friend to pretend she was a particular girl that G. knows and to flirt with him through texting. He didn't really take the bait too far but he did say he could use some loving, then said j/k. But my daughter was out with some friends last night and G's sister called her up to say that G. was flirting with this girl. My daughter lost it in front of everyone and called me over and over again, but my phone must have accidentally gone to "silent" mode. Today she got me and she is suicidal, sure that her life is awful and will always be awful and that the more she tries the worse it gets and no matter how hard she tries, it doesn't do any good. She was inconsolible and said she didn't even want to be around family or friends, she just wanted to die. She wasn't really listening to what I was saying. Now I'm freaked out, shaking at the keyboard. She won't do anything right now because she's at work (and said so). I'm concerned about 4:00 when she has to go home to G. In fact, I'm terrified. So these are my options and I'm not sure which to do: 1/Call 911 and tell them she threatened suicide. The only thing that stops me is that she'd say she was fine and they'd let her go, then she'd shut down and never give me a chance to help her ever again. Even if they kept her, it would just be overnight and she'd still have to go back to him. And, again, then she wouldn't trust me and I'm really the only person she has who she feels she can talk to. So this is touchy. 2/Called her father who promised to try to reach her and get her to stay with him. Now this is a good altnerative. She lives near her dad and he has a big, big house. But she doesn't like to stay with him. I don't think she would. He can be very annoying and although I think he is frightened enough not to be annoying right now, I don't know that she'd give him a chance. 3/Drop everything and run down to Chicago. She told me not to, but it's hard for me not to. I'm not sure what I could do once I was there, but....? On the other hand I have two kids here and can't leave them for too long. J. and G. have a land contract on the house. The lease is up in May. I can't stay until May. The house is actually in J's name, but I really don't think she is up to the drama of throwing him out. And of course there are all those tenants rights, etc. 4/Call my sister and ask her to go check up on J. Problem is, Sis doesn't know J. that well...they don't really have a relationship as we lived far apart for most of her life. J. has said she doesn't feel comfortable around Sis, even though Sis is really a nice person. I am stunned, not so much by the threat but by how desperate she sounded and how few good options I have. She said, "Mom, it's my life." Anything I haven't thought of? I'm halfway out the door and on my way to Chicago. by the way, I am NOT afraid she'll use drugs again. Unless it's to do herself in. She has already said she is not going back to THAT life no matter what, and that was yesterday and Is believe her.